Squizz

I've been going to AA on and off for almost six years now.

A lot times I hate being there. I hate the people. I hate the smell of the churches. I hate the readings.........I hate just about everything about AA.

But I'll tell you this much: I don't feel that way when I leave a meeting. I usually feel strangely optimistic.

I know a TON of people who feel exactly the same way.

One guy who's been sober for 27 years now put it to me like this:

"I've never gone more than two weeks throughout my sobriety, where I feel like I'm just going to tell everyone at the meetings to eff off. So I get to the meeting, and I'm PISSED. I'm going to tell everyone EXACTLY where to go. And then something strange happens: Somebody will say to me, 'So Gerry, how's it going?' and I say, 'Oh fine. I'm great!'"

And that's the funny thing about meetings, you can walk into one stark raving mad, a complete lunatic, and walk out a completely different person.

I should know, it's happened to me MANY times.

I don't know what it is, but that's just been my experience.

DayTrader

Boy, can I identify. It's also precisely why they wrote that line in the AA book that reads "to be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face."

Not all that many ppl I've known hated AA more than I did when I first showed up. I hated the book, hated the people, didn't believe it would work for me, thought the steps were bogus, and thought everyone there was half-******** and easily bought into AA's half cult / half hippie-commune BS. I was also COMPLETELY convinced I was far too smart, far too deep, and far too complicated for "the program" (and boy, I hated it when they'd refer to it as "the program....." how infantile!) to work for me.....especially when it's so simple that a homeless guy without a grade school education could "get it" and get it to work for him.

It's obviously a good thing I wasn't ever REALLY committed to much of anything (including my own beliefs) because I was wrong on every one of them.......when it came to AA anyway. As fate would have it, I fell in love with the program, it absolutely works......for me and for anyone who'll work through all of it....and it's THE single best thing I've ever done in my life.

.......it's probably not what you think it is......and it's nowhere near what I thought it was. lol.

lillyknitting

They say you only need to do step 1. I like aa for the support and mixing with peeps who I can identify with and help and support me but the only requirement for membership you need is "a desire to stop drinking" .

DayTrader

Hopefully you never heard that in AA....

.....because, if that's precisely what you heard, whomever said it is full of it and/or has no real experience with AA and the steps and was likely just trying to repeat something they thought they heard from someone else...something that sounded neat to them.

Let's just use some common sense for one..... if all you need in the AA program is the first step, why are there 11 other steps, a whole lot of chapters in the Big Book and many other books devoted to all the other steps and how to practice/incorporate them into your life?

I think maybe what you're likely referring to, hopefully what you "really" heard and just remembered incompletely (or possibly what you head from someone who doesn't know what they're talking about) is a saying that floats around the rooms of AA. It comes from the 12 & 12 - but gets twisted by some AA members sometimes because they haven't read the section and just repeat what they think they heard someone else say.

In the 12&12, in the section on the 6th step, it reads:

Only Step One, where we made the 100 percent admission we were powerless over alcohol, can be practiced with absolute perfection.

.....What they're saying is that the first half of the first step can and must be practiced "perfectly." The other half of step 1 and the remaining 11 steps will be works in progress and, possibly, never worked "perfectly at all times."

As is obvious from the quote where your statement came from, all we're doing in that first half of the first step is admitting we have absolutely NO power to control our drinking once we start and NO power to keep ourselves from picking up that next first drink...... we're just admitting, from our experience, that we're powerless in that regard. -- while the admission is great, you'll need the next 11.5 steps to get recovered.

Zebra1275

I tried to stop drinking many times in different ways. I avoided going to AA for years because I wasn't that bad, and I knew that the meetings were full of alcoholics. I wasn't like them, I was different.

gravity said it well, and I wish I would have heard this (and paid attention to it) years ago
It's your choice - keep drinking, being miserable or suck it up and go to AA.

I gave up and finally went to AA because my drinking had gotten to the point where I was about to start losing stuff, wife, kids, job . . .

I've learned a lot from the program and the people I've meet in it. I'm thankful that the AA program of recovery exists, it was there when I finally decided I needed it.

AA will be there for you whenever you decide you need it. The program will also be there wherever you need it. There are meetings all over. I travel some on business and it's cool to be able to go to a meeting and be welcome wherever I'm at. It beats sitting alone in a hotel room thinking about drinking.

StPeteGrad

I'm with you on the travel thing! I used to hang out the hotel bars until closing time. Now I grab cab and hit meetings. It seems I never need a cab ride more than 2 miles and there has ALWAYS been someone willing to take me back. It's very exciting and I love seeing how they do it in other parts of the country.

AA is there for us whenever, whereever we need it.

Duke10

OK. So I did my research and found the next meeting site. For my area it had all kinds of little letters that mean different things. No-smoking, smoking, women only yadda yadda. It was a little confusing but I think I have it figured out. Can I ask what I have to do at the first meeting? Can I just sit and listen or do I have to participate?

Pigtails

Nobody wants to be in AA! Everyone is resistant at first. It's the club no one wants to belong to. But it helps many, many people. I am so glad I went to AA, even though I thought I would hate it (and I do hate certain parts of it, honestly.) I would encourage you to give it a try... why not?... maybe it will work. Try to keep an open mind and a willingness to try what has worked for others, in the hope that it will work for you too! Best wishes and happy holidays.

Pigtails

I just saw this update, yay.

You don't *have* to do anything, just show up. You may be asked to introduce yourself, in which case, just give your first name. If asked if you want to share, you can, or you can say you are new and just listening. People will likely be welcoming and accepting. You could also try a speaker meeting, where only one person shares their story, instead of people going around sharing their thoughts. Try to look for similarities among the speaker/other members rather than differences. Don't be surprised if you feel emotional or over-whelmed, this is natural. Good luck. Let us know how it goes! I'm glad you're taking a step in this direction... action will get you very far!

doggonecarl

Check out this stickie:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-about-aa.html

Duke10

Thanks Dog! I have checked out a few of those websites so I think I know what is ahead of me. Just afraid. Once you go then you are in a whole different world.

Gile4551

aa is a great thing to do if you're uncomfortable with it. that's when you will get the most out of it.