cunning, baffling, patient
 

4 weeks today and aside from slight evening craves, I seem to be doing alright! Yipee for that. Some interesting mental wars with alcohol though. Just before I got on the sober train, I found a fantastic sale at Vons in San Diego (I split my time between NY and SD). Scotch, vodka, champagne all at great prices. Guess who bought about 6 bottles plus five bottles of wine. Under normal circumstances, no problem, but given alcoholism and single apartment living in SD....probably not the best thing. Well, then comes the sobriety band wagon.

CUNNING: I am too cheap to throw away, and certainly cant bring into work or give away to good friends in SD....it is too much money.

Baffling: I guess I am better off staring at a fridge full of great boos to stay sober.

PATIENT: You haven't cracked yet, but you will and I will be right here waiting for you.

Fortunatley my wife and kids came out to visit. My wife astutely pointed out the recipe for disaster, so we decided to pickup some bubble wrap and boxes to ship the boos back to NY. We landed last night in NY without the slightest scratch of a bottle....resilient little suckers!

Plus Side: We did Christmas eve at my in-laws, today at our house and the 28th at my parents. We have a bunch of boos to keep everybody merry.....(says the alcoholic).

Funny enough, I seem to do just fine when it is staring me smack in the face. I cant tell if that is my fortitude and will power, or if the cunning/baffling/patient is rearing its ugly head.

One more thing....the SD quantity of boos is nothing compared to NY...wine fridge and all. Hell, I have some bottles of Opus that aren't ready to drink for three years. Despite the absurdity of this badge of honor, I feel like it makes me more resolved in not drinking. CUNNING.....AS I DELUDE MYSELF. Well, still sober today!:whoop

boos. sounds like ghosts.

why bother buying booze, sale or not? next time, leave the money in the bank. you seem to be deluding yourself that you are "cheap."

throw it out, seems like you're not seeing very clearly....

No argument here SB. In fairness, I didn't buy it sober. There are others who drink responsibly in my family...no need to punish them. That said, my delusion hasn't escaped me, just coming to terms one day at a time.

Happy Christmas to you. hope you have a peaceful and sober day. And you should never buy booze, not even as a pressie for someone else. we just cant underestimate the power of this thing.

It will be much easier to come to terms with it if you don't have it sitting in your fridge staring you in the face. There will come a time when you have a weak moment and you will walk to that fridge open up a bottle and start drinking before you even realize you are doing it. Get rid of it. This is not about testing our self-will or wearing a badge of honor, this could be your life.
God bless.