DisplacedGRITS

Hi everyone. I'm back in my dear Alabama to be with me and my husband's families for the holidays and I'm doing fine by day but the nights are a struggle. I'm too busy during the day to havesignificant cravings but I feel like half of the commercials on are for hard liquor and it's getting to me. I am not going to drink and even if I wanted to, I don't really have the means to. I just wanted to share my frustrations. I went on a major bender a little less than 2 weeks ago and had my last major withdrawl symptoms around Friday so this is about the time I start getting major craves. My only saving graces is my determination to stay sober and enjoy my days and the fact that I'm in a very controlled environment. It's so frustrating I just want to cry.

Frankie12

Hi Displaced,

The holiday season can be a big challenge for many of newly sober, or trying to stay sober.
Being inundated by commercials pushing liquor, beer and wine is not helping matters at all.
Would it be helpful for you to abstain from watching TV? Is that even possible for you? (Not that anyone can force you to watch, of course, but in some households the TV is simply on all the time.)

I can't tell if you are a new member on SR, but if you are, welcome! This is a good place. You'll find support and strength here.
I find it helps me to spend time here, reading and posting.

Btw. GRITS = Girl Raised In The South?

Frankie12

Ah, Displaced....never mind my question about you be being a new member. After my browser refreshed it showed you joined in August and had over 140 posts.

Sorry!

Scolova

My mind has been ripping me apart tonight, not entirely about alcohol, but it's on the list and those commercials aren't helping. I've made it 90 days and I guess my pink-cloud has evaporated away. I really wish I could put my anger issues to bed while I stay awake, most of my drinking was done due to anger, hate, resentment.
Frankie, Grits is corn meal in southern US, I guess like porridge is oat meal to northerners, but Girl raised in the South is good too.

Dee74

welcome back DG

I think we have an inbuilt defense against those ads - we know what the reality is for us.
We've lived it.

Pull up any thread here and read.

Think about the last time you got drunk.

For us alcohol does not make us funnier, it does not make us more attractive to the opposite sex, it does not make parties spontaneously erupt, it does not make our bad times better....

we know the truth - we just have to keep reminding ourselves, sometimes....

stay strong

D

DisplacedGRITS

Hahaha...both of y'all are correct. I'm a displaced Girl Raised in The South! Displaced because my home with my husband (also raised in Alabama) is now in Wisconsin. I broke down and cried today driving through my old stomping grounds but I suppose that's to be expected.

Abstaining from TV would probably drive me nuts. We don't have cable where I live up north so zoning out to a little TV is kinda fun. I'm trying to take every liquor commercial as a challenge and remember how much happier I am in general sober. Also, I'm afraid I had another seizure last week wile sobering up and that's helping to scare me straight. Also, I'm doing my damnest to stay on my meds. I also have an eating disorder so the holidays are kind of a double whammy. I am trying to view all of this as a chance to grow and learn more about what makes me tick. Thanks for the support. I think I'm going to try to keep posting here and maybe find an AA meeting tomorrow.

Frankie12

Hi Scolova,

I know about grits, I've even tasted them.

If you don't mind, I prefer our oatmeal.

The acronym for "Girls Raised In The South"GRITS is quite well known and available as bumper stickers, t-shirts, baseball caps and so on.

I spent some time living in The South. I can say that The South is where I picked up my past drinking habit, which I don't hold against The South, btw.

DisplacedGRITS

So true, Dee. Keeping in mind how clear headed and responsible and happy I am during the day sober is helping my motivation. My mom and dad are great in that they've kept the alcohol away and in a safe place away from me. My dad accidentally left a single beer in the bottom of the fridge so I told my husband about it and if I touch it, I'll be busted. That helps too.

DisplacedGRITS

I tell ya, grits are way better than oatmeal! Lol...hehe..to each his own!

My "home" now is around Milwaukee and it's one of the hardest places to sober up. The good thing is there are tons of resources for sobriety up there. I've been to rehab twice and was actually locked in the psych ward for 4 days to safely detox last time. When I go back, I only have one day between getting home and seeing my therapist so that's good.

DisplacedGRITS

Good news is that I found a meeting at a great time on Thursday morning. It's close by and, even better, it's open so my husband can come. I'm not typically an AA person but I think it will be good. Coming here gives me encouragement and strength to go.

Scolova

That's good about the meeting, I know of acouple in my area and really need to get into one or both.
Wow, I have feared being locked up in a psych ward for many years, but looking back, it would have started me on the path to sobriety much earlier than this. My neighbor would have an Old Milwaukee's Best in his hand, every time I'd see him. He now has terminal shaking on his left side. I guess it would be weird to go to a Brewers game without the brew, that's all I think when I here Milwaukee.

Frankie12

Great that you found a meeting to go to, GRITS.
I know you can make it through the holidays! Sounds as though your family, as well as your husband are supportive of you.
And then, you can always check in here.

Btw, can we call it a truce on the grits versus oatmeal question?
Simple explanation, you have southern taste buds, mine are more northern.

DisplacedGRITS

The psych ward was, pardon the pun, a sobering experience. I actually had minimal withdrawl symptoms. Many of the people in there were suicidal, schitzophrenic (sp?), hearing voices, delusiona, etc...I went to 3 weeks of partial hospitalization (6 hours a day 7 days a week) then 4 or 5 weeks of intensive outpatient (4 hours, 3 days a week). I relapsed a couple of times in IOP and was asked to seek one on one therapy. Of course, I put that off and relapsed yet again. I'm tired of all this crap so I hope this time away from Milwaukee will give me a head start.

DisplacedGRITS

Deal, Frankie!

I feel a lot better, friends. Thank you. Hot chocolate helped too, lol.

SoCalDude

DVR is your best friend. I record all the shows I want to watch the night before, and watch them the next night so I can fast forward through the commercials

gaffo

Something someone said on this site really resonated with me--something about being the only survivor in a room full of zombies, I've modified that as a defense against those maddening beer commercials..."must drink beer must eat brains"...

Ten more days and we will have survived the "Holiday Trifecta". Stay strong!!!!

flamingredhair

Weighing in on the grits vs. oatmeal debate. I'm a lifelong northerner but spent some time in the south during the summer of 2010. I have to give my vote to grits even though I was raised on oatmeal, probably because I'm a "savory" eater as opposed to "sweet."

While in the south we attended a wedding at the Biltmore Estate and at the reception dinner they served grits with cheddar cheese and chives that was one of the most amazing things I've ever tasted.

Okay. Carry on.

soberlicious

OK, yeah, I just can't wrap my head around anyone NOT liking grits...LOL

As far as the commercials. They are just selling a product. No more, no less. Because that is their goal, of course they make it as tantalizing as possible. I think it's important to keep in mind the psychology of advertising and not fall prey to it. I said it in a different thread, but I'll repeat. If the commercials depicted people waking up in their own vomit, they wouldn't sell much product! It's all smoke and mirrors...change the channel or DVR as suggested.

Pigtails

Sometimes I get really mad at liquor companies and their advertisements because they capitalize on human weaknesses. I feel like they know that people can be addicted to alcohol and so they exploit that and glamorize their products that actually make people like us sick/help us stay sick. But then I realize many people drink alcohol recreationally and are not addicted to it (I am not sure if those people are the ones who care so much about the ads, or who are drawn to the product due to the ads). And anyway that's just how adveristing is, and the more people drink, the more money they make, so there is obviously a market and they are just selling to it. I try not to let it concern me anymore but when I do get triggered I remind myself that it like poison to me... if someone was selling a bit bucket of rat poisoning or something else that made me hurt myself and others, would I be salivating for it? No. It is my brain's way of trying to have what it wants but what it wants is bad for it, so, too bad, it's not getting any. I don't know if any of this helps but it's how I look at it.

I'm glad you're going to an AA meeting, I think that will help. Holidays are very stressful. Please know that you're not alone and these feelings are normal. Could you try taking a walk or doing yoga or some other form of exercise to get you concentrating on your body instead of your mind? Or how about watching some holiday Christmas movies or something else where you know there won't be liquor advertisements? (I know, it's pervasive and you are liking to see a scene of old guys sitting around the fire drinking Old Fashioneds or Hot Toddys... but, hopefully it won't be as triggering as the liquor commercials).

Best wishes. Keep posting and staying strong, you can get through this.

DisplacedGRITS

Thanks everyone! I'm starting to the the truth behind the lies of the liquor commercials. I was never a two or three drink person and of course, they're not going to use the sloppy drunk lush to sell their product. When we see a McDonald's commercial, do they show a morbidly obese person getting 3 Big Macs, 2 large fries a milkshake and a Diet Coke? I think not!

Heh, it kinda helps that I've caught a stomach bug my mom had. The mere thought of alcohol turns my tummy!