Warning - Long post - I'm not going to sum it up so you "TL;DR" (too long; didn't read) folks can look away LOL
Over the past week I was really stressed out (which showed in some of my posts) and in the stressful time, I didn't have one thought about drinking. I'm a little over two months sober (2 months, 3 days) and the reason for the stress was due to school and upcoming testing that I was worried about.
Before I quit drinking I just had a job and I wasn't happy - acted semi normal at work but I was always tired, hungover, and felt crappy from the night before. The night of the 16th of October I was drinking, had several beer cans beside my desk (my hiding spot) and I had about 20-30 cans there from previous nights and there I was finishing my 12 pack that I bought on Saturday. I got really depressed that night and didn't like anything at all - yet I made a 1,000 mile move, had a job, transportation, mountains, nature, and several things going for me, yet there I was moping over my life.
I had enough, not suicidal or anything but just really depressed and I there I was with a beer can in my hand - The connection was made at that point in my opinion. I finished up the beer and went to bed.
I woke up feeling like crap, depressed, and sick.. I saw the beer cans sitting in a tower beside my desk and the beer cans from last night scattered on my desk - what the hell was going on with me? I should be happy! I went to work and when I got home I knew I had enough of this alcoholism and I said no more - I searched google and found SR. I made my first post
and that Monday was my first day sober in over a year. The year before I went sober for two months, but relapsed, but I had no support and I had my second brother move in with me and about a few weeks living with him and stress made me go back to drinking heavy.
Anyways - Since I'm sober I've been improving my life, I noticed that I was tired for the first few days with bad cravings but I was drinking tons of water and keeping my mood upbeat and happy - and boy, what a difference that made. I had support for the first time (thanks SR!) and I had things going my way.
With almost a month sober, I lost my job due to not having a High School diploma or GED. I lied on my application when I applied and their background service basically busted me. I went home and cried and was really depressed, had bad cravings but I took a bath, relaxed, and went out for a LONG walk and thought about my sobriety and life. I had huge SR support in my october thread and I'm so glad I did - I knew I wouldn't go back drinking, but I had alcohol withdrawl big time because of stress. I never did drink over that very stressful situation and I'm so very thankful - I owe it to SR and my own commitment to sobriety. I found a new job within 2 weeks.
After losing my job because of no diploma, I called and made an appointment to start going back to school and getting my s* together. I studied HOURS on end and then came the week before the exam, I was really stressing out and I had a horrible day the day of the exam - Remember, I never dealt with real stress outside of the two situations (job loss and exam) without drinking, so I'm still learning. I passed both tests with flying colors, I scored well over 100 points MORE than what is required to pass them.. I just found out today by the way
Anyways - Stick with sobriety, Life will get hard but boy oh boy - you can do so much with your life (even in really stressful times) if you stick to your plans and keep on your path of sobriety. If I can do it, you can do it. Relapsing multiple times is not "normal", it's not healthy, and it will just make you think it's okay to keep relapsing - it's not. Take control of your life and deal with situations as they come. I may of been a crab with the stress, which is not a good excuse, but at least I wasn't stumbling out of a bar and driving home.
I would still be crying and drinking over the first stressful situation and I still wouldn't have a job if I was drinking.
Stay sober and take care of your life.