Okay, this has been bothering me so have to share
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
Okay, this has been bothering me so have to share
I wasn't honest and truthful with the nurse technician person this morning at my doctor appointment. He asked "tobacco usage?"
Answered "none" (totally honest there)
He asked "alcohol usage"
I answered "ah just a bit". He asked "how much"
I answered "maybe a glass or two a week, that's about it really" (LIE LIE LIE)
DAMN
I felt horrible afterwards. I almost pulled him back after I answered that and admitted it. I've never ever given the doctors the truth and yet on Tuesday I will be coming clean to my therapist. I know they will probably refer me to Army Substance Abuse Program which I'm grateful for but I feel horrible that I lied.
Even to this point I wish I could email my dr and tell her the truth. Admit that I lied but then I keep reminding myself, on Tuesday the caca hits the fan anyways. She'll see it in my medical record after that. And she'll know I lied to her.
I'm really ashamed of myself. I'm otherwise a rather honest person. I might tell a white lie here or there and of course for years and years I've answered the same way to the same question but not it rips me up that I said that.
Answered "none" (totally honest there)
He asked "alcohol usage"
I answered "ah just a bit". He asked "how much"
I answered "maybe a glass or two a week, that's about it really" (LIE LIE LIE)
DAMN
I felt horrible afterwards. I almost pulled him back after I answered that and admitted it. I've never ever given the doctors the truth and yet on Tuesday I will be coming clean to my therapist. I know they will probably refer me to Army Substance Abuse Program which I'm grateful for but I feel horrible that I lied.
Even to this point I wish I could email my dr and tell her the truth. Admit that I lied but then I keep reminding myself, on Tuesday the caca hits the fan anyways. She'll see it in my medical record after that. And she'll know I lied to her.
I'm really ashamed of myself. I'm otherwise a rather honest person. I might tell a white lie here or there and of course for years and years I've answered the same way to the same question but not it rips me up that I said that.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 205
Don't feel bad. It could be argued that you did exactly the right thing. Your medical records can be produced in a variety of contexts, and many people make a point of never mentioning their drinking or other substance abuse to their doctor for that reason (the caveat to this is, and it's a big one, that detox can be dangerous and safety may well trump discretion when it comes to detoxing).
I once wanted to try antabuse. I didn't mention it to my doctor, but went to a private clinic in another country for the prescription.
Your therapist records are also subject to production, but that is less likely and probably worth the trade-off in any event.
I once wanted to try antabuse. I didn't mention it to my doctor, but went to a private clinic in another country for the prescription.
Your therapist records are also subject to production, but that is less likely and probably worth the trade-off in any event.
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Munchkin,
I am retired Military. I made the mistake of not admitting that as in my last 5 years or so I became an alcoholic. It is not great to have in your records while active duty, but is a big hole in your records when you retire if that is your plan. I also taught some of the AF program. I am long ago retired but don't you realize that if that means separation they will rehab you first. Get sober with them now and get the alcohol problem in your records. Then do the rehab program and succeed for life in it by getting sober. What do you have to lose? The addiction? I think you may find that if you want to get better, you will very soon. If given a choice make sure you volunteer for any in patient or in army programs offered. They cost a lot more on the outside. However I used the VA for in hospital detox and rehab and I am not a homeless wreck by any stretch. Stop being afraid if you can and start looking forward to the relief of no longer hiding and fearing.
Good for you!
I am retired Military. I made the mistake of not admitting that as in my last 5 years or so I became an alcoholic. It is not great to have in your records while active duty, but is a big hole in your records when you retire if that is your plan. I also taught some of the AF program. I am long ago retired but don't you realize that if that means separation they will rehab you first. Get sober with them now and get the alcohol problem in your records. Then do the rehab program and succeed for life in it by getting sober. What do you have to lose? The addiction? I think you may find that if you want to get better, you will very soon. If given a choice make sure you volunteer for any in patient or in army programs offered. They cost a lot more on the outside. However I used the VA for in hospital detox and rehab and I am not a homeless wreck by any stretch. Stop being afraid if you can and start looking forward to the relief of no longer hiding and fearing.
Good for you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
Hi Itchy,
Thankfully I'm a spouse, not AD.(active duty) That's hubby.
The horrible thing about all of this? Hubby is the ASAP(army substance abuse program) person for his unit. LOL
When we moved here and he got that job in his unit I thought "Well isn't THIS ironic?! Hubby is the one responsible for testing soldiers for Substance abuse and his wife is an addict!" LOL
Thankfully I'm a spouse, not AD.(active duty) That's hubby.
The horrible thing about all of this? Hubby is the ASAP(army substance abuse program) person for his unit. LOL
When we moved here and he got that job in his unit I thought "Well isn't THIS ironic?! Hubby is the one responsible for testing soldiers for Substance abuse and his wife is an addict!" LOL
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 521
You know... the only thing you can do is say... okay that wasn't the exact truth... come clean if you want and if you don't pray about it... forgive yourself and move on.
Someone said in AA the other day how they were such a shady person before coming into recover... and now and then they want to lie... and it will just come out in conversation.. and it doesn't have to be about anything important... and they will have to stop the conversation and say "you know I told you I just climbed Mt Rushmore..." but, honestly I have never even seen it... Which I think was funny as $hit!
But, in the end it is just the DESIRE to be deseatful that she fights more the anything.
Saliena
Someone said in AA the other day how they were such a shady person before coming into recover... and now and then they want to lie... and it will just come out in conversation.. and it doesn't have to be about anything important... and they will have to stop the conversation and say "you know I told you I just climbed Mt Rushmore..." but, honestly I have never even seen it... Which I think was funny as $hit!
But, in the end it is just the DESIRE to be deseatful that she fights more the anything.
Saliena
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Munchkin,
Aha! You are an unissued but acceptable spousal Unit!
Most folks don't realize that behind most military folks they say thank you to there is a spouse that makes it possible. My Significant Harassment signed on with me 39 years ago. They should have given her the medals. I just did the fun stuff.
OK then, you don't have career issues so you get the rehab done anyway. Good luck to you. Don't worry, you'll get used to not having to lie about it.
Is he OK with your getting treatment?
Ironic? Sure is!
Aha! You are an unissued but acceptable spousal Unit!
Most folks don't realize that behind most military folks they say thank you to there is a spouse that makes it possible. My Significant Harassment signed on with me 39 years ago. They should have given her the medals. I just did the fun stuff.
OK then, you don't have career issues so you get the rehab done anyway. Good luck to you. Don't worry, you'll get used to not having to lie about it.
Is he OK with your getting treatment?
Ironic? Sure is!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Ninja Camp
Posts: 495
Munch I think you are being really hard on yourself.
It is a hard thing to admit and doctors realize that. As Nic said in our conversation the other night though, they need all the info to know how to best help you.
If it makes you feel better you could email her or leave her a message that you wanted to talk to her about it.
If that isn't a possibility talk to your therapist about how to best present the information.
You are going and doing the things you need to for you. Be proud of that. I am proud of you.
It is a hard thing to admit and doctors realize that. As Nic said in our conversation the other night though, they need all the info to know how to best help you.
If it makes you feel better you could email her or leave her a message that you wanted to talk to her about it.
If that isn't a possibility talk to your therapist about how to best present the information.
You are going and doing the things you need to for you. Be proud of that. I am proud of you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
The crazy thing is 1 year ago I answered the question with no qualms what so ever. I answered the question with no thought that "well that was completely dishonest". If anything I felt like it simply wasn't their business.
Now I almost felt like crying as I answered it as if someone inside of me was screaming "WTH are you doing?!!??"
So at least the good side is it will be coming all out on Tuesday. I have to fill out a very long questionnaire and a good portion is all about substance abuse. I will be honest about that. It's going to be hard to fill it out and I plan to fill it out by myself when hubby is not around and my son is possibly in bed.
It will go in my very EXTENSIVE records(after all I'm a military brat and a spouse. These records have been kept since I was born. )so any future doctor will be able to look and see.
Now I almost felt like crying as I answered it as if someone inside of me was screaming "WTH are you doing?!!??"
So at least the good side is it will be coming all out on Tuesday. I have to fill out a very long questionnaire and a good portion is all about substance abuse. I will be honest about that. It's going to be hard to fill it out and I plan to fill it out by myself when hubby is not around and my son is possibly in bed.
It will go in my very EXTENSIVE records(after all I'm a military brat and a spouse. These records have been kept since I was born.
)so any future doctor will be able to look and see.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
Originally Posted by Itchy 
Munchkin,
Aha! You are an unissued but acceptable spousal Unit!
Most folks don't realize that behind most military folks they say thank you to there is a spouse that makes it possible. My Significant Harassment signed on with me 39 years ago. They should have given her the medals. I just did the fun stuff.
OK then, you don't have career issues so you get the rehab done anyway. Good luck to you. Don't worry, you'll get used to not having to lie about it.
Is he OK with your getting treatment?
Ironic? Sure is!
Aha! You are an unissued but acceptable spousal Unit!
Most folks don't realize that behind most military folks they say thank you to there is a spouse that makes it possible. My Significant Harassment signed on with me 39 years ago. They should have given her the medals. I just did the fun stuff.
OK then, you don't have career issues so you get the rehab done anyway. Good luck to you. Don't worry, you'll get used to not having to lie about it.
Is he OK with your getting treatment?
Ironic? Sure is!
I always liked the bumper sticker "Army Wife: Toughest Job in the Army" Actually he is....somewhat. In the past when I've somewhat asked for assistance from hubby it's always with the "sure, you can get help but it's gotta be convenient for me" idea. In other words if it means he has to pick up our son, drop off our son, take off from work, leave work early, get into work late then it is no good but if it doesn't do any of those things above then it's fine. Since then we've talked a bit(he's actually on a TDY right now) he has agreed to do whatever to help me.
Now that being said, he's getting ready to go to a school for three months so he'll be gone from January to March so it'll be just son and I.
I have no one to watch my son (other than my alki Mom) so I will be doing most of my rehab here online each day(and I will check in each and every day, attend the meetings online, go to the gym with my son to get us out of the house and away from the witching hour (as a friend calls it) and then maybe when hubby comes home in March I can start possibly attending any sort of AA meetings in the area.
Thanks Art! Actually I wish I could get my dr's email address but she won't give it out. Funny. My podiatrist readily gives out her email but my GP won't. LOL
Good news is after Tuesday it's in my records regardless. Info like mental health issues stay secret somewhat but substance abuse will be in there. No worries though as it won't hurt anything else. Military can't go after hubby since I haven't done anything considered illegal so I'm happy about that and none of my jobs will ever suffer since they have no access to my military medical records.
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
I've never put my career ahead of my family in my 27years of AD!
Well maybe a little. Think about swapping with another spousal unit that also needs to get some help with watching kids. Their house.
You have had some most excellent responses here munchkin.
I look forward to following your adventures kiddo!
Well maybe a little. Think about swapping with another spousal unit that also needs to get some help with watching kids. Their house.
You have had some most excellent responses here munchkin.
I look forward to following your adventures kiddo!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
Dee,
Actually the doctor won't give me her email address. I asked actually today! Go figure, my podiatrist and acupuncturist will but my GP won't. LOL
Unfortunately we just moved to this area about a year and a half ago. We now live on a mostly civilian base with housing that is about 1/4 full.
The neighbors we do have that are military or civilian we just don't get along with all that great. One neighbor is in hubby's unit and they really don't get along. The other neighbors are okay but they tend to be loud, swear like sailors in front of their kids, use their kids(3 yr old, 4 1/2 yr old) to go get their beer, wine or other alcohol along with their smokes, so we don't have much around us. We keep meaning to start interviewing possible candidates for babysitting but have yet to find the chance. It was always put off behind something else.
Actually the doctor won't give me her email address. I asked actually today! Go figure, my podiatrist and acupuncturist will but my GP won't. LOL
Think about swapping with another spousal unit that also needs to get some help with watching kids. Their house.
The neighbors we do have that are military or civilian we just don't get along with all that great. One neighbor is in hubby's unit and they really don't get along. The other neighbors are okay but they tend to be loud, swear like sailors in front of their kids, use their kids(3 yr old, 4 1/2 yr old) to go get their beer, wine or other alcohol along with their smokes, so we don't have much around us. We keep meaning to start interviewing possible candidates for babysitting but have yet to find the chance. It was always put off behind something else.
*Grateful*
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,619
Maybe I am wrong, but you know, people don't really care nearly as much as we think they do. Case in point. My late husband died of brain cancer and he was miltary. (USN) I have his entire medical file downstairs in a huge tupper tub. I loved him dearly, but I have never read through all of his medical records. "yawn" I don't even know why I still have them, I am re-married and he has been gone over a decade.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
