CamilleBelle

It was not as bad as I thought it would be... I took a xanax to avoid withdrawls in the early morning, so it felt a little surreal. I woke up around 11 and got a call from my mom, saying she was going to an AA meeting in her hometown... I tried to talk her out of it... I'm the alcoholic, Not you, so why would you go??? She said it was an open meeting and she just wanted some insight on the whole situation. I had planned on going to a 5:30 meeting today, but I could already hear myself saying, no, nevermind, I'm fine, I just need to stop drinking and I can do this without help. My mom said I sounded down, and mentioned a noon meeting in my area. litterally 2 minutes from home. Felt like crap, dizzy, hot, ect, but for some reason, at 11:47 I got dressed, did my makeup and went to the meeting, introduced myself and got a silver coin thing. Everyone was welcoming and friendly. Not scary odd people, but normal decent people. And gosh, they have been through some stuff!!! Couldn't believe half of it! I will go back. I think It will be the only way for me.... Want to know the funny thing though, I left feeling inspired and warm and happy... so I bought a bottle of wine! I think this "thing" has way more power over me than I ever thought possible. I think when my husband gets home Ill tell him where it is and have him help me pour it out.

PaperDolls

Well, I'm glad you made it to a meeting. That's great news!! The second one will be even better. And yes, get that bottle poured out!!! It's critical.

As far as your mom going to an open AA meeting ..... that's her decision ..... I think you should be grateful you have someone who loves you so much. She's willing to go and learn about the disease so she knows even more. It's a good thing! You should suggest Alanon to her. It's specifically for friends and family of alcoholics. She'll get a lot out of it!!

Congrats again!

Anna

Camille, you can pour out the wine yourself.

I'm glad you're working on your recovery.

Dee74

I agree - pour our the wine yourself, Camille.
Make a statement- even if only to yourself

I'm glad you went to the meeting.

D

Jay1980

Your mom should check out Al-Anon. It's for family members of alcoholics. There are just as many of those meetings as their are of AA.

Gerbosko

CamilleBelle - Glad your meeting went well and that you were inspired, I'm thankful that you're going to dump out the bottle of wine you bought. It might be hard at first to detach yourself from the bottle but with you taking proactive steps to quitting alcohol it's going to just get easier.

SadRN

FYI- Xanax is just AS, if not more addictive than alcohol. Get away from it at ALL costs!!!

aasharon90

Ive been to a many meetings within my
21 yrs. sobriety and have met many nice,
awesome, intersting people of all backgrounds
and was surprised at how many had similar
stories as I which made me feel comfortable
being around them.

Just normal looking people with a common
problem looking for a similar solution. I guess
that's what kept me going back and staying
sober for a many one days at a time.

CamilleBelle

Thanks for your posts! I'm still staring at this bottle like it's the only thing on earth... I know I should pour it out... not wait for him to do it for me. And SadRN, I know all about the xanax, I hate pills so it takes a lot for me to even take one, but it was that or a full blown panic attack. I dont like the way they make me feel at all, so I dont worry about getting addicted to them, even if I take any I take a 1/4 or a half. Gonna start a puzzle... see if that helps keep my mind occupied.

newmoon

I know how hard it can be to get rid of something so obviously like that! I was holding a bag of cocaine over the toilet for literally 45 minutes once. Its a tough battle, but believe me, you will feel just a little freer once you can let go.

sugarbear1

Only cut the xanax if there's a cut line in the middle, otherwise it can be fatal.

singlespeed

I agree - pour the bottle out. It's too much temptation. I had an open one in my fridge the week I quit and I had to get rid of it as it would have been too easy letting it sneak its way into a glass. Remember, it's our enemy, not our friend!

Great job getting to a meeting. Keep going back!