Back to Day 1 again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 111
Back to Day 1 again.
I basically ruined Thanksgiving for my girlfriend and me. Did the same thing earlier in the year with my birthday.
Spent all day today and last night throwing up from withdrawal. When I go on binges, I can never seem to stop until I'm literally too sick to drink anymore.
I think I need to make the following changes.
1. Get off my high horse. I'm not the expert here, I'm the beginner.
2. Start actually "doing the work". I was pretty much doing the least to get people off my back, but didn't quite realize it. I was thinking I was doing it for me, but my girlfriend was finding these sites, buying the books and reading, etc. I wasn't doing enough.
3. Priorities. She listed them for me: it's Alcohol first, then my friends, then Reddit, and finally her. Not a great system.
Spent all day today and last night throwing up from withdrawal. When I go on binges, I can never seem to stop until I'm literally too sick to drink anymore.
I think I need to make the following changes.
1. Get off my high horse. I'm not the expert here, I'm the beginner.
2. Start actually "doing the work". I was pretty much doing the least to get people off my back, but didn't quite realize it. I was thinking I was doing it for me, but my girlfriend was finding these sites, buying the books and reading, etc. I wasn't doing enough.
3. Priorities. She listed them for me: it's Alcohol first, then my friends, then Reddit, and finally her. Not a great system.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
Start actually "doing the work".
but I wasn't actually doing the work I needed to do to keep me sober....the only thing I was really working on was drinking.
D
I'm here to learn!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: I'm on it!
Posts: 2,038
Originally Posted by Seared 
1. Get off my high horse. I'm not the expert here, I'm the beginner.
I wish you the best.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 92
Seared, I am so proud of you. Making that leap from "how do I make this issue go away" to "how do I make my life better" is massive. Good for you for realizing what you need to do and for coming to SR to talk about it. Good job.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 28
Congratulations on your admission. Humbling yourself is a big step. I realized i needed to stay sober after leaving my kids at home and driving drunk to get more alcohol (wasn't caught, thank god) then not remembering anything about the night before, then opening a bottle of wine on Thanksgiving and finishing it myself. (had separate bottle for guests) my guests only had one or two.
Now I know I will NEVER be able to drink normally. I had to admitt I could not do it on my own. (tried many times to stop or cut back). I told my hubby. It is HUGE that your girlfriend has looked into this stuff. I have been told it gets better. I am trying to hold on to that. You should too.
Now I know I will NEVER be able to drink normally. I had to admitt I could not do it on my own. (tried many times to stop or cut back). I told my hubby. It is HUGE that your girlfriend has looked into this stuff. I have been told it gets better. I am trying to hold on to that. You should too.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 111
Originally Posted by Noknewme;
It is HUGE that your girlfriend has looked into this stuff.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Alabama
Posts: 226
As someone who has relapsed too many times now, I can tell you that it takes WAY more work than I ever thought it would. You really have to want it bad because it is a daunting task, but, no where close to insurmountable.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt
Posts: 298
seared I hope that you can find that small sliver of willingness. Sounds simple, but I was not willing for 30 years. ( tried many times to get sober) What is willingness to you? For me, I found it had to be everything or I had nothing. After 6 months sober I find it to still be the same.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
lushly: I agree with you and have been where you are, except that it took me more than 30 years. I always thought I was in recovery (or had recovered!) but I was still playing games. It's really weird how one can feel that recovery is underway when the reality is that the situation has yet to come to a head so that a beginning can be made. It's that first step. All the other steps are easy compared with that first step. After 23 years of sobriety I still can't explain why all of a sudden I began to recover after so many many years of thinking I was coping with this illness and in reality I was just kidding myself.
W.
W.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 111
Day 4
Can finally eat normally again. Feeling better, and went to my first recovery class since drinking. They don't kick people out for drinking, as long as you want to get better.
...which is good, because otherwise I would have just told them I hadn't drank at all over the holidays, and who would that be helping?
Can finally eat normally again. Feeling better, and went to my first recovery class since drinking. They don't kick people out for drinking, as long as you want to get better.
...which is good, because otherwise I would have just told them I hadn't drank at all over the holidays, and who would that be helping?
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
