Jenners

Blah, after doing a good job of cutting back last night, I seem to be less ambitious tonight. It's not even like I feel like drinking, I feel like I am just sitting down relaxing and having an empty glass feels weird. I don't even drink fast, but it is 10 and I have had a drink an hour since 3. So 7 drinks already. And this happens every day. I justify all the time that one an hour is not a big deal but the amount it adds up to every week all the time is brutal.

1undone

:ghug3

suki44883

I tried rationing and moderating my drinking for years. It just never worked for very long. Alcoholics just aren't satisfied unless we can drink as much as we want. But, it seems we'll try just about anything before we are willing to admit that we just shouldn't drink, period.

Tippingpoint

You're not going to get anywhere till you decide to quit completely Jenners. Moderation doesn't work. You have to commit to quitting and then you have to do it. Pick a day.

How does tomorrow sound - November 23rd, 2011. You'll be able to celebrate Christmas and your one month marker sober.

Think about it. You know you have to do it. So, just do it.

Jenners

Quitting before the holidays seems so difficult. Although I know I should look at it as feeling good thru those days instead of like crap. And how would I even explain to everyone??? People are pretty used to me having a glass of wine in my hand.

Dee74

yeah I could never get a decent streak of cutting back Jenners - got a good many streaks of drinking myself into oblivion tho....

I know it's a big step, but the only way I really found to change things was...to change things...

The only way was to break the cycle of drinking completely.

D

Jenners

Dee, did you just stop completely? That seems like the best thing for me for sure, but so unreachable.

eJoshua

I know how you feel. I felt the same way for a long time, except in my case it was more like this:

OCT-DEC - Quitting around the holidays is just so tough, there's no way I can do it.
JAN-MAR - Quitting in the spring would be impossible. The days are so short and it's cold and depressing.
APR-JUN - Summer's here and how can I quit during the summer? It's so nice out and I won't be able to live without an ice cold beer in the summer.
JUL-SEP - I'm not sure I could quit now, days are getting shorter and the summer is ending, it's so depressing.

Unfortunately, it's like how they say there's no good time to get sick. There's no good time to quit, but the sooner you quit the sooner you get better.

I think TippingPoint has a great suggestion. If you were to quit tomorrow you would be feeling sooo much better around Christmas. Don't worry about what to explain to the relatives, that's all secondary stuff. You can cross that bridge when you come to it. If you have family stuff tomorrow you can just say that you aren't feeling well so you decided to lay off the sauce for the day.

I know you can do it. Trust me, I have been sober for 7 months and there's no way that I thought I could go even a whole day without drinking. I was ready to drink myself to death because it seemed easier than trying to quit. I knew the only way that I would make it is if I stopped cold turkey. It's like a band aid: you just have to rip it off quick.

There's always hope in recovery! You can do it!

instant

Cutting back just prolongs the sense of dissatisfaction. The first week is a hump but dire predications of what it will be like are lies from the part of you that wants to continue to be addicted.

Once you are over the hump and you are happy with the initial decision the growing sense of freedom is liberating.

Dee74

I did. Tapering never worked for me, and I couldn't stand one more day drinking.

Unfortunately, I did it without any thought whatsoever, and I also had a very bad detox - that's not to say you will, but I really recommend you see your Dr beforehand Jenners.

D

NickSwitzerland

Hi Jenners,
I've been drunk most days for the last 18 years and I've
never got past five days dry before. I joined SR this week
and I'm on my sixth day. Like you most people find it odd
if I'm not drinking, this happened last night at my in-laws,
I just said I had an ear infection and was on antibiotics..
Then all the questions stop, no pressure, no inquisition.
I know how hard it is, I feel odd at the moment, like I've
smoked some low grade cannabis, but it's a hundred times
better than a hangover, start tomorrow, and at Christmas
we can both celebrate one month!!! All the best...

Tippingpoint

I think most everyone that quits "just stops completely". There really isn't any other way to do it.

I agree with Dee - If you've been drinking daily for a long time you should visit your Dr. and they will help you to detox safely. It can be dangerous for some.

I am super excited about a sober Christmas this year. I'm not worried at all about drinking situations and what people will say. I'm proud of my choice and am confident that I hold the moral high ground - at least as far as my own situation is concerned.

Good luck with your decision Jenners.

MsJax

Hi Jenners. This really would be a wonderful time to just be done with it. This is my first sober holiday season in over 4 years, after a horrific 4 year relapse. If you stopped today, you would have a solid month by Christmas. For me, it is such a relief to not have the stress of trying to drink anymore.

You are right, people will make comments & ask about why you're not drinking. You owe no one an explanation.

One of the many things I love about sobriety is having my time back. I wasted almost all day every day drinking, even at work. You can stop today and get your life back.

Bimm

You taken the first very important step by realizing you have a problem. Take the next step and try to get sober. Unlike some others here. I've only been dry for 6 days and already I can tell I'm better physically and emotionally. Sure, I still want to sit down and throw a few back, but I am determined to beat this alcohol demon.

Do it for yourself, please.

WhoDey

Jenners ... You know what you need to do. You may not want to admit it to yourself right now, but you know what you need to do.

I spent so much time, money, and energy on my drinking. Moderation was drinking without getting drunk. Sure, I had many evenings/events where I drank and didn't get drunk, but I also had many evenings where my drinking got in the way of the rest of my life.

You've invested so much of yourself in drinking and it hasn't worked. Why not invest in not drinking for a time and see what happens? If 30 days scares you, quit for a week.

I've only been sober 10 days and I'm floored at how my life has improved. I feel sad about the time I wasted with my wife and kids, but I'm on the right track now. Only 10 days, but I can see how I made alcohol an idol in my life.

Continue to visit SR and learn the stories of others.

chainsaw4618

Hey J: Everyone has said it, we all know it: there is no moderate drinking for us. The thing I would say is this: I think you have to know this also, or you would not be here sharing this site with us. I know it is very scary, but you know the day is coming when when you will have to stop all together. It is daunting, but it is coming.

Gerbosko

Hi Jenners!

Don't worry about what other people think, they have their own opinions and you have your own. You're doing this for your health and well being, not theirs .

Jasmine2011

Why is it that we're all so concerned what people will say or think?

If someone says, "why aren't you drinking?" Simply say, "why are you?"

Charon

You reminded me of this quote:

Sometimes I think about having a glass of wine with dinner. Then I
remember I have plans for Christmas.
-- Robert Downey, Jr.

Charon

Jenner,

How about this for an incentive. You say you drink 10 drinks every night. Figure out what that comes to in dollars and set that amount aside every day instead of drinking. At the end of a week, month, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, a year, etc. take that money and spend it on whatever you want. Frivelous or not, no justification other than you want it. If you Hold Fast to not drinking you will also be able to enjoy life. In a very short time you will find that you can even take a trip - to the Caribbean or many other places. If just feeling better isn't enough rewarding yourself might tip the scales. But as everyone has said, more than very short term, moderation is not an option for us.