onetanktoomany

Hello everyone. I've decided to create an account here tonight, as on Thursday night I drank myself into obliteration for the last time.

I've had a mixed history of problems with alcohol. I'm only 26, but I have been experiencing problems with drinking for at least the last 5 to 6 years at least.

I'm a binge drinker, and have no particular dependency on drinking regularly. I can go considerable time without drinking, but every so often I find myself completely messed up (every 3 to 6 weeks or so) having drank ridiculously too much. This culminated two nights ago with a visit to the "drunk tank", my arrival and specific reason for being there still elude me.

In any case, I've decided that enough is enough. I've had dangerous and "eye-opening" experiences in the past, but none as humiliating as this. My problem is that, since I am not a regular drinker and instead simply drink far too much when I do, I have had what one could call "success" in the past, having opted to not drink for a long period of time. I no longer wish to drink again (ever, period) but none of my loved ones (specifically my girlfriend, who is my best and only friend in the world) believe that I will be able to succeed.

What advice can anyone suggest to someone who has experienced specifically problems with binge drinking, in succeeding at overcoming it, and at establishing support in my loved ones? I understand it may be too late, but I don't know what I'll do without her.

I'm also not particularly spiritual, and a lot of support information online pertains specifically to allowing God into your life. I'm certain this form of support is great for many, but I don't know if this is right for me.

I'm just looking for some insight. Thank you everyone.

DarrenW

I was the same way. I would go weeks and even a couple of months without drinking...then I would reward myself and drink a case or more. I thought that I couldnt have a problem if I didnt crave beer. I suppose I am lucky- not physically dependent on it= just used it to "chill" out lol.

I have finally realized I can never drink again. If I do, I might die as I could never stop until I almost passed out. Driven drunk probably at least 100 times. No DUIs and I will not get one now for sure. I have a guardian angel on full time alert for sure.

I just told my parents and my wife, joined AA, and made an appointment with a counselor. I need to be held accountable by people. I will never drink again, but I am sure it will be a difficult road. Good luck.

bozboz

I began with binge drinking, which in the past couple of years led to drinking everyday. My advice is, listen to what people say here on SR. Try different things until you find the one that suits you best. Most people go to AA, do inpatient/outpatient rehabs, etc...I went to my dr, who suggested I see a therapist and a nutritionist. These have both helped me. When I'm having an extremely bad day, I'll go to a meeting, or I'll stay here on SR, reading everyones post. I also pray, but that's not for everyone. I've never notice anyone judging anyone else here for their beliefs in SR.

Wishing you the best!

~boz

tanja

I think you can overcome a drinking problem if you make the commitment to change. If that is your number one priority and you put forth the time and the effort to change. Changing the way you think is instrumental. Believe you can do it. Support is available here. You are not alone.

artsoul

Welcome, onetank!

I started off as a binge drinker, too...... I never seemed to have the same ability to control it that some of my friends did. The more I drank, the more i wanted "just one more."

The amount/frequency of our drinking doesn't matter as much as what happens when we do drink. Staying away from the first drink is the only way we can avoid the problems.

Take it one day (or one weekend) at a time, get support, and look for things to do that don't involve drinking. It takes some getting used to, but being sober is a better life all the way around.

onetanktoomany

Thanks everyone for your replies. My road to success starts now, and I intend on ensuring it through whatever means possible.

I know one cannot convince a loved one to stay, if they feel that it is in their best interest to leave, but can someone offer up some insight with respect to this? I'm experiencing a lot of stress and mixed feelings about this whole time in my life; I can change myself for the better, but I'm losing the things that matter anyways, not to mention a good part of the reason I want to change.

I want to change for myself, but I want to change for her too, because I love her and want to show her I'm not a lost cause. More importantly, because I want to give her a life of love and happiness; I'm just afraid my foolishness, and poor behavior may force her to choose love and happiness elsewhere.

Dee74

Hi onetanktoomany

I think joining a community like this will be helpful.

I started as abinger, ended up an all day drinker, but I still wrstled with the idea I wasn't 'that bad'

Coming here every day and reading and posting helped me reinforce the idea that I was in fact that bad, and I got a lot of support in changing my life and quitting for good

Good to have you with us

D

least

Has your gf indicated that she wants to be on her own, without you? The way you put it seemed that way. I'd just say, go into recovery for yourself, for your own well being, and if your relationship is strong and healthy it should survive the change. That said, many people find that they can't live the life they lived as a drinker (when they're sober) and that they have to make changes, some painful ones.

Just do this for your own good and hopefully she'll see that she's not losing you, she's just gaining a healthier you.

onetanktoomany

Thank you for your reply. She has certainly indicated she wants to leave, and I've tried to explain to her that "this time is different". I also know that's a near impossible thing to believe, especially after having witnessed several failures, and don't blame her skepticism whatsoever.

However, I've never felt as adamantly about this as I do, nor as certain of my future success. I hope I can make her understand, and thank you again.

Anna

I remember feeling as lost as you are right now and wondering if my marriage would survive, could it? The hard lesson I had to learn is that I had no control over other people, and all I could do was to take care of myself. Honestly, I think if I had tried to stay sober to save my marriage, it wouldn't have worked. Be patient, focus on you and stay sober. That's all you can do.

For me, I did need a spiritual connection, but if you are motivated to recover, then you will.

DarrenW

Here is a thought- do an online journal like I did and give your wife a way to access it- either by bookmarking the thread or having her become a member here. She doesnt have to post. Then post in it every single day in the beginning. Let her read it and be honest. Even if she leaves she can see how you are doing. This, of course, would only work if you did quit drinking for good. Just a suggestion. Good luck.

TigressTen

i was a binge drinker and i have 8 months sober today....we do recover....

TigressTen

I WAS A BINGE DRINKER..........AND I CELEBRATE 8 MONTHS SOBER TODAY...WE DO RECOVER....

Dee74

congratulations TigressTen - and welcome

D