iamlost

I found this website. I realize now that alcohol is a big problem for me. I hate myself every time I drink. I think I can control it, but the first thing I think about in the morning is when I get to have my first drink. Its not like I don't work, but what I care about is getting drunk. When I drink I make totally stupid decisions. I can honestly say alcohol has never done one good thing for me, but I give it my time, money, and self worth. I hate myself for what I have become. I want so much to quit, but I know I am lying to myself. I can't. God I hate this.

Rusty Zipper

welcome to the family lost

thats a great start,

you can climb out of the abyse as i have, and many many others.

put the drink down, find a program of recover that works for you,

and stick with it.

all good wishes lost,

and you will get found


rz

IndaMiricale

Welcome lost , you will find some good support here at SR

I can relate to all that you said you can find a better way

Keep comin and chatting

Sparkydog

You are wrong, you can quit and its not really as hard as you think and every day gets easier, and not being a slave to alcohol is habit forming once you get on track, and once you start thinking with a clear mind your life will improve on so many levels your only regret will be not having done it sooner.

If someone had told me this a year ago I wouldnt have believed it, I believe it now. Go see for yourself. It will be the best decision youve ever made.

Dee74

Welcome to SR iamlost.

I pretty much felt exactly the same way as you do when I got here.
I got a lot of support advice and encouragement here - a little hope too

I know you will find the same

Have you got a plan to stay sober?

D
D

ronf

Hey Lost, Mornin! Your in the right place at the right time! I remember being staggered (pardon the pun) at the number of people who have felt the exact same feelings as myself. Now, your one more. You'll find several different approaches to our common goal here. AA worked for me, you may find something else.
Keep posting, keep reading. You'll soon find the worst is over! It all gets better from here!

Ron

MsJax

Hi lost. You can get sober. I had countless mornings like you, the wanting/needing a drink, the regret and on & on & on. You can start a new way today.

Tigger41

Hi IAL and welcome. You can beat this u need to be ready and committed but once you are it gets better. I am at 17 days and feeling really good. Still thoughts about drinking but it's nice not to have to worry about the next time I can get a drink in me.

You'll find support here come whenever you need to

overthis

Hi iamlost,

I have felt the exact same way so many times. I am only a week into sobriety today but I am beginning to realize that we CAN do it. We just have to decide we are going to live a better life for ourselves, it all gets easier from their without alcohol controlling our every waking moment.

iamlost

Thank you for the kind encouragement. I am going to try for day 1. I really want to kill this beast. I have no plan other than keep thinking about how alcohol has screwed up my life. I think I will go to a movie and go home afterwards instead of head to the bar. I want freedom.

WhoDey

Welcome.

I joined here this week and could have written your post. I thought my problem wasn't as bad as others, because I was carrying on with my life. I saw a pattern in my drinking, however, that wasn't headed in a good direction. It was just a matter of time before my drinking started to have major impacts on my life.

If you decide to stop drinking, take it just one day at a time. I'm on Day 5 ... which doesn't seem like much, but on Day 1 it seemed like a huge hill to climb.

Read the stories of others ... share yours if you're ready. You'll find lots of support here.

I'm glad you posted.

Genie

Lost - I found reading posts on this forum has helped me. There is quick support here and the people sincerely want you to get better. I've seen myself reflected in so many posts and realize that I am not alone in this struggle.

I wish I could control my drinking too - be normal, have only 2, but the only thing I can control is not taking that first drink. After the first drink, I've lost control. I don't want just one drink anyway or just two - that's torture for me. Moderation is not in my vocabulary. It's easier for me to simply not drink.

iamlost

I want to thank everyone. I have made it 3 days - the longest time without alcohol in over a year. Genie, that is exactly how I feel about just having one or two drinks. I always want more - it is torture. Sometimes I even sneak off to the bar while I think no one is watching so I can down another drink. Lately I have been hiding alcohol in my car so no one will find it. If I am honest with myself, I drink to get drunk. There, I said it.

Hevyn

lost, Be very proud of what you've accomplished so far. I was the same as you - hated what it was doing to me, but kept pouring the stuff down my throat anyway. Looking for what, I'm not sure. In the end, there was no more fun or joy, just misery and regret.

I know you can do this and have a whole new life - one not filled with sadness & hopelessness. We are with you on this journey. Keep talking.