Pondlady

Wondered how things have worked out for all the posters a year ago.....just curious.....it would be nice if they followed up.

Melanomagirl

Interesting thread! I've enjoyed all the posts and opinions. I was talking to my sister today and telling her that I've decided to quit drinking..again. I told her I'm more serious about it this time and I've joined a support group (sr). I told her I'm scared I'll fail by having a drink and what that would mean...it would mean I had a serious problem! She and I ran a marathon together a few yrs ago so today she used it for an analogy...when you set out to train for 26 miles it seems impossible (just like never drinking again) but you get a plan. You follow your training program-one day at a time. You train and focus on that run. Everything may go smoothly all the way to race day. But on the other hand you may miss a run bc you're sick. If you miss a run you don't say forget it I won't do the marathon. You get back on track where you left off and keep training. Your goal stays the same. You want to do the marathon. At the same time, you don't set out to skip runs..and half a** train.

Hope this makes sense. It encouraged me. My goal is no drinking! But somewhere down the road if I mess up, it doesn't mean throw the towel in or that I'm a failure. Good luck everyone!!

quitforme79

"Looking back now, the truth was I was a blackout alcoholic drinker who sometimes had a 'normal' drinking experience - it was blind luck, not good management".

The above describes me to a t....thank you for this post. Always great to hear your words of wisdom

Dee74

time for a bump.

D

ImperfectlyMe

I'm so glad you bumped that!!!! I and im sure others needed to read that. Today is my 60th day. So glad to be where I am. No more counting days from here on our I'm moving onto months.

Thanks dee

Hollyanne

Dee, thanks.
I talked to a friend who relapsed in April.
She bought a bottle of vodka so it would be easier to hide the "EMPTY".
Turned out, she filled 2 bins with empty vodka bottles.
She sounded awful. We talked for a while.
She was saying that it was a good thing.
She also said it affects no-one as she lives alone.
She has five kids, adults, but you know...
She needed to get it out of her system etc.....
And I listened and she then told me how she can't walk properly now.
She also sounded a little confused. I am sure she was truthful about not drinking the last few weeks. I have seen wet brain up close. I worry she might be a bit damaged.
She is only in her 50s.
There is no such think as a harmless drink to us.
I am glad you brought this up.

Nighthawk8820

I think its somewhat of a process. Like I remember saying things like I wont get drunk this time, or I will drink less. It took me these attempts to get to the point where I knew I had no control in the matter and there was only one way to resolve this, and that was NO drinking at all. These people saying "At least I didnt get drunk" are simply not at the final stage yet, where they fully realize the extent of this addiction. Its normal to try everything under the sun besides quitting drinking completely. I did herbal things to cure hangovers, added water to my bottles of booze on the countertop so nobody would know how much I really drank the night before (replacing it with a REAL bottle sometime in the day so I could start again that night), drinking water when drinking, pedialite (as I heard it cured hangovers, it doesnt), setting time frames for drinking or a specific time I had to wait before starting drinking, because drinking in the day time was only for alcoholics. I could only begin drinking after 9pm, and boy oh boy was it hard waiting for 9 to roll around. I would get pissed watching the clock waiting for GO time. I did every thing I could think of to try and get around admitting what was actually happening and realizing it was all or nothing. Its frustrating sometimes seeing people say things we all know are excuses or whatever, but for them, its just part of the process to realizing what must be done. Its all part of the process in my opinion. You can tell them everything you know, but its like when you were a teen and your parents tried to give you advice. You listened sometimes, but more often than not, you had to figure things out on your own through making mistakes/trial & error.

Dee74

Sure Hawk that's a given.

Every time I share my experience, I have no idea who will find it useful and who won't, much less who's 'ready' or who's not.

I don't even know who may read this 10 years from now...but all that doesn't stop me sharing it.

It can't - it's what we do here

D

HReady

Dee~Thanks for your recent Bump! I read the whole thread!!You_Rock_

Talana

I remember trying to moderate my drinking.... I'd have 2 or 3 drinks and then I'd go to bed. I was so proud of myself, I felt like I'd accomplished something special.
Looking back I had accomplished nothing at all, I only did that when I quit totally.

Dee74

Giving this discussion what I think is a timely bump.

D

fini

thanks for this thread, Dee.
as for the above quote, i can't see it as either/or but "and". you can do both. it IS good if someone stops at one, AND you can encourage a little deeper look.

Junegirl

Thanks for bumping this, Dee. It was what I needed to read.

Junegirl

bigsombrero

Wow, and here I am in 2013 wondering how I'd missed this amazing thread! Glad to see it got the bump it deserves.

Very wise words Dee. I couldn't agree more.

I do see many posts that mention a "little slip last weekend", or "I just had a few beers but got out of there" and the like. And all too often those posters are met with supportive applause. In my opinion, we should keep the support - but lose the applause. This is a timely reminder to all of us that getting sober is serious business. Those little slips turn into free-falls and those couple of beers turn into an ambulance ride.

ReadyAtLast

Great posts Dee

I also feel sad when I see the posts because I know when I used to do it it meant

" at least I didn't get drunk......this time. What a relief. I will next time though"

zombiegirl

I stopped myself last night in buying wine after work as I didn't want to let myself or u guys down.
It's not worth all the work I have put in to spoil everything I have achieved.
I knew that if I bought that wine it would end up going from a glass to a bottle then on to the beer in the fridge that my husband has in.
Instead I got myself a hot chocolate my book n went to bed.
If I didn't have this site im not sure what I would have done but I know now that it is possible not to drink

SnoozyQ

Dee thank you . I'm sure it will offer food for thought to a lot here cos we all aim to get sober .

People know you well enough to realise its not a judgement !merely an observation Nor is it directed at any individual .

If this post helps just one person , its a job well done xx

Thanks for caring about us x

SnoozyQ

* bump*

bemyself

Bloody marvellous and timely post for me - thanks for bumping it Dee!!!

mecanix

I had six or was it nine months sober in 2002 or 3 .. swimming every morning before work , fitter and healthier than i'd ever been . I knew i was an "binging" alcoholic from about 1998 ..

At the end of those nine months i persuaded myself that one small glass of wine was a sensible thing to have for the "health benefits" with my dinner .

6 months on from there i was again drinking 20 pints per day on the weekend and 3 bottles a wine a night mon-fri… my job got in the way , so i sold my house and moved to france to live in a cheap cottage there , i was drunk for 4 years and some of the boxes i'd moved there with were still unopened . i was drinking 3 bottles of wine a day and some spirits occasionally .
I lost all my money , moved back to the UK and bummed of my mum for a year having a bottle of whiskey every other/ every 3rd or 4th day . trying desperately to control it , to try and give it up somehow …. till next time …

Somehow i managed to land a job 5 years ago (they were desperate) whilst drinking 2 bottles of wine a night and till blackout at the weekend … that went on until 27 months ago when i quit for good .

I lost the years 28 till 37 in my life, 9 of what should have been great years , a house , a job , a cat , a life , my self respect . who know what damage to my long term health …

Thats what one little drink did for me .. 9 years ..

Think the drink through … the full 9 years ..

Yours' gratefully in recovery , living it as fully as possible every day , m