dingoraven

just thought i would post a few things here. i started binging pretty hard a couple months ago and where i'd drink very heavily 2-3 days in a row then stop for a week. i just got into a relationship and she thinks i have quit. my body also can't take the day after anymore. this time i'm extremely bloated in my stomach. just scared about my overall health and the effects this could have on my relationship. i just think to myself, what am i doing? why do i need to do this?

anyway, i'm in my late 20's and will begin a job in january. but right now the dangerous thing is having all this time on my hands for the moment. it's especially at night when i'm alone that it gets bad and the temptation and urge to drink is very strong.

i guess i feel that this is something that could be a huge problem for me down the road and i want to nip this out sooner rather than later. i hate always saying, 'this is my last drink and that was the last time' but then it only lasts a week and makes me hate myself more for not being a man of my word.

would love to hear any feedback from people who may have experienced this themselves. i have no one to really talk to about this so i think this forum could be a really thing to use to get to the root of this.

pikkle69

I'm brand new to this forum as well. I just got off a very heavy month long binge, been sober for 17 days now... before that, drinking heavy 3-4 days then 2-3 days off for about the last 15 years. Not a fun cycle. Do it for yourself and your health, my health is what really scared the hell out of the after this last binge. I've been unemployed for the last month and a half so I have the same challenge with lots of time on my hands and now having to force myself to not do what I would normally have done in the past which is drink myself into oblivion. It's hard as hell but I'd rather not die just yet. Good luck, hang in there.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

It seems like a vicious cycle when you drink, then you hate yourself, and of course you want to drink again just to relieve the negative feelings and it never ends. Unless, you make a decision to stop drinking. I'm glad you have done that!

bozboz

A big welcome to the both of you! A lot of great advice and people here on this site.

Dee74

Welcome dingoraven
I know you'll find a lot of support and a few ideas here

Have you thought of other positive things to do with all this time on your hands?

D

pikkle69

I will admit that even after more than 2 weeks, my energy level is not where it needs to be but I'm forcing myself to do projects around the house, not huge ones but just enough to take my mind off things for a few hours and it is helping... I've run my course with everything on cable at this point!

least

Welcome to the family. My early recovery was up and down for a while but it ended up smoothing out, as did my life. I'm glad I gave up drinking for good and only wish I'd done it sooner.

dingoraven

yeah i have a whole list of things i would like to do. obviously it helps on the nights where my gf is with me (she never drinks). it's the nights when she works that it becomes a problem for me. so the cycle right now has been do well for a few days (working out at night, coffee shop, reading...) then i don't know if i convince myself that i can 'reward' myself with getting wasted for one night. it then turns into 2 more and i feel awful and feel like a giant failure the next couple days. then it starts again.

i really want to take responsibility for my life and the choices i make. need to fight through those discouraging moments.

thanks for the welcomings btw. seems like a very friendly, helpful place.

sissy07

Dingoraven,

Welcome to SR!!!!

Impurrfect

Welcome to SR!!! I spent many a night here, in early recovery, reading posts of others and it was great to read of those who had found recovery, and a good reminder of why I didn't wanna go back to my using life (I'm a recovering crack addict) with some other stories.

We've got it all here..those who want recovery but haven't found it, those new to recovery, and those who have some good time and are giving back what was given to us with support.

Welcome to the family!

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

pikkle69

Well, I went out tonight and met up with a very good friend who was also a very hard drinking buddy and believe it or not, I wasn't talked into going out and drinking... gotta keep winning the little battles like those!

artsoul

Welcome dingoraven!

You're taking a really positive step by stopping the pattern before it gets worse. I used to make those "last time" promises, too, but it didn't work very well until I got support and worked on getting through the cravings.

It's easy to forget how bad we felt after a few days of not drinking. Glad you're here - we know what it's like....