randomliargirl

My name is Caitlyn. I am turning 24 next week. I have had substance abuse issues since I was 12, between narcotics, presciption drug abuse, eating disorders and SI... I have done it all.

I cleaned up about 4 years ago. Stopped smoking weed. But secretly I was still doing prescription pills. That is the first time Ive ever admitted that. I wasn't going to... but thought it is useful here...

in the last 2 years, I have increased and increased and increased my drinking. I dont smoke weed anymore and I have been off pills for 6 months. I am a smoker... cigarettes. But I cannot stop drinking. I want to so badly. I have gained so much weight and I know it affects my relationships.... every day I wake up, and say I will not drink today... and then I get home from work and down a bottle of wine!

I cant stop. I need to stop. I dont want it to kill me. I have been an addict for 12 years... enough is enough...

Please Help Me!

Dee74

Hi randomliargirl

Welcome to SR - you'll find a lot of support here.

Besides us have you tried any kind of support before?
D

least

Welcome to our international recovery family. It is possible to stop drinking and live a better life - I'm proof of that. After trying and failing I've finally succeeded and have 23 months sober today. You can do this. Support is crucial. Do you have any other support? Friends, family, a recovery program, counseling? I see a counselor once a week and it's been very helpful, both in getting sober and staying sober. If I can do this, so can you. :ghug3

Tigger41

Welcome to the boards. You can do this - you really can and yes it will be hard but if you got off the pills you can do this. I'm an evening wine drinker and started taking Antabuse - for me I only need a moment of strength to take the pill to know I can't drink for another 48 hours. For me it's something I need right now. Most folks here it's just sheer will power. But we can all do this. We're more committed and stronger than the addition.

Reach out - get whatever help you can get from family, friends and doctors just don't give up and keep trying and trying again until you succeed.

Hevyn

Caitlyn, If I could quit in my 50's after drinking for a lifetime, I know you can. I didn't know how I'd live without it - but then I realized I wasn't living anyway. I was numb and like a zombie most of the time in the end. You won't let that happen to you!

When I came here & saw so many people just like me, I was encouraged and filled with hope. I was all alone with the nightmare before joining SR - no one in my life understood what I was going through. You can do this and have a wonderful life. We're here to help you on your journey.

Anna

Caitlyn, Welcome to SR!

There is hope that you can do this and we are here to offer you support.

tanja

Hi Caitlyn, it is hard to stop drinking, but I know you can do it. Are you using alcohol as a stress reliever of reward mechanism after work? Can you find other ways to soothe yourself for just one day? (a warm bath, good book, massage, a lot of good ideas on the "what can I do" section of the forum). One day at a time really does work. You will get a lot of good advice, support and love here. You are far stronger than you think you are. It took a lot of courage to post and seek help. That is a sign of strength and a desire to change. Never, Never give up!

CaiHong

Hi Caitlyn,

You have made the first step, you recognise the problem. I commend you for that. I can't believe it took me so long. I am 57. Though I did have some years of sobriety for different reasons. It is only now that I realize that the drink was making my life so much worse, awful really.

I am 5 months sober and can honestly say I am feeling great and these feelings are becoming more prolonged as time goes on. I use AA and this forum to stay sober.

You can do it.
CaiHong