greebobeebo

I have been through so much in the last 12 months ish.

It all started in Feb this year, #1 son started to act different, I rang social services, who took until june to contact me, then he decided to move to his grandparents. The first I knew was when his grandad told me that he was never coming home.

I have had mental health problems for a long time and was begginning to rely on #1 son to help out with #2 son. Not once did he tell me he wasn't happy with it all.

I have been clawing my way slowly out of my hole, tablets and counselling and a drug and alcohol group.

I moved to a cheaper rent flat, with #2 son and things were looking good, I had stopped drinking every night.

Now I'm drinking more than I was, not every night though, miserable as sin and feeling like I don't want to be here anymore. Good thing I still have #2 son otherwise I wouldn't be here now.

Everything is still positive, apart from slight money worries, plus I have a new kitten to help.


I am sick of feeling like this, I can't talk to my Mum, she doesn't want to know. Personal problems and a partner who has problems too. My OH is going through his own issues and can't be sympathetic at the moment. All my friends have their own problems, I don't feel right dumping mine on them too.

I don't really know why I posted on here.

LoftyIdeals

Posting here is part of the road to recovery. Welcome to SR. I hope you'll continue to come here and read the hope in the posts of those at all stages of recovery. And I hope they will move you to achieve the improvements in your life that you seek. Life can be hard and lonely at times, but I have found that sobriety is a great way to handle it all. Peace to you.

Eliasson

Welcome to SR! I'm so glad you reached out. There are so many wonderful, caring people on this site. I felt just like you do, truly I didn't want to go on and am pretty sure I wouldn't have had it not been for my kids. Because I couldn't die, I decided I HAD to find a better way to live. I've been sober for 86 days now and I can promise you if you put the drink down and leave it down, a day at a time, it does get better. Some things haven't changed. My 17 yr old son still has brain cancer. I'm still battling a debilitating autoimmune disorder. My husband is still actively drinking very heavily and we have major financial problems. But, I have changed! How I look at things, my attitude, and the gratitude I have for the little things in life. It's all different. There are still hard days, but I know a drink won't make it any better. You can do this. It will be the best decision you've ever made in your life. Do it for you. And your sons. We are here to help in any way we can!

artsoul

Hi gree -

I'm sorry you're feeling so alone right now. Is there anyone in your drug/alcohol group you could call (or your counselor?) I'm sure that the people in your life care very much about you even though they may not be supportive right now.

I think the real problem, though, is alcohol. Drinking kept me in a depressed and anxious state where everything seemed overwhelming and hard to cope with. I think as long as you're still drinking, it's going to be like that. It's miserable, I know. I'm glad you posted and hope you decide get sober - you deserve better.

Dee74

welcome back Greebo

I think when things start to get overwhelming is the time to reach out, so it's good to see you. You'll find a lot of support here

Can you speak with one of your drug and alcohol counsellors as well, or whoever you see for your mental health issues?

I think when we have more than one thing going on it's really important to tackle everything.

aussieblue

Hi Greebo I am so sorry to hear your struggling like this. I am hopeless at giving advice but I wanted to say I am thinking of you . Listen to the good people here they have pulled me out of some dark places. :ghug3 It was a nice surprise for me to see your face here today .