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The good news and the bad news...

Old 10-29-2011, 06:24 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Have you ever considered that something great could be waiting for you around the corner?

It easy sometimes to let our fears get the best of us, or think that things will never get better (at least it is for me). Part of staying sober means that I have to let go of some of that, try to stay in the moment, and find little things to be grateful for along the way. (It takes practice, so don't give up!):ghug3

Also, remember that you can only do this one day at a time......
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Old 10-30-2011, 12:30 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Congrats on your time! I would second what many have said here: maybe now is not the right time for that trip?
I can't speak about drug addiction because I am an alcoholic, but I remember my first few months of sobriety were very tough. I went to AA meetings, but I essentially just sat there. I didn't do any recovery work. I didn't have a sponsor, hadn't started working the steps.

Things finally started changing when I started doing "the work".
Some people seem to be able to recover and feel better with a minimal amount of work. I think that is fantastic and I tip my hat to them!

I'm not one of those people.

I needed to do a maximum amount of work in order to recognize the nature of my emotional problems, what made me drink, and what I needed to do to change my entire outlook on myself and the world around me.
Have you considered some kind of program? There are alternatives to NA, such as a therapist, as laurie recommended.
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Old 10-30-2011, 01:34 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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((JD)) - we have similar stories. I was totally miserable with XABF#1 (I'm a slow learner and have THREE). I had always drank with him, but when things started going south I turned to opiates. Quit both of those with no problem, but was still miserable.

My alone time had been used to get numb. I eventually met someone who introduced me to crack, which is what brought me to my meeting.

I realized I wasn't comfortable being ME, and if I didn't get a grip on it, my future would be really bleak. I started reading the Friends & Family forums and worked on accepting me. I had to deal with the harsh fact that, though the ex's were abusive to me, in one way or another, I was the one that tolerated it. At that point, I realized that I couldn't save the world, didn't have to save the world, but I could be the best me I could.

Basically, I had to work recovery from addiction and codependency to start making progress.

I don't know if you're a codie (codependent) but a lot of us are. We go through "if only ---would happen, I'd be just fine". Thing is, great opportunities and people aren't just going to fall in our laps.

Recovery is tough, no doubt, and I've been through some pretty traumatic things. However, the support and ES&H (experience, strength, and hope) I've gotten here has helped tremendously, and encouraged me to reach out to loved ones for added support. I really don't think true recovery can work if we don't have support.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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