4MyMel

I think my depression is coming back. It was really bad back in 2007/early 2008. Then things kind of happened that pulled me out of it. Since then, I've met the love of my life, lost all that depression weight, almost done with my MBA, have a better job and am excited about the next chapter in our lives. Throughout all this, I never stopped drinking however, in fact, it has gotten worse. I've tried to quit a few times, but here I am again. This time though, I have no motivation and feel like my depression is creeping back. I'm falling behind on my school work, not putting in 100% at work, not in the mood to do anything anymore, I just wanna sit on the couch and have people feel sorry for me. I've done the therapists and the anti-depressants (which I ended up abusing!). I KNOW what will make me feel better - quitting drinking, going to the gym, putting my head down and finishing the last few weeks of school, but I just don't feel like none of it. I told my gf that I'm having a hard time because she's seen me drinking more, and I feel like I need her to do something, but what can she really do?

Any suggestions? How do I snap out of it and do what I need to do?

Anna

Hi,

It's good you're aware that you're feeling down right now.

And, no your girlfriend is not going to be able to solve the problems for you.

If you stop drinking, it's possible that your depression will lift. Alcohol is a depressant. However, you might need help from antidepressants. I had to try a few to find one that worked for me. It's something that you might want to talk to your dr about. I could not have recovered had I not treated my depression.

suki44883

I told my gf that I'm having a hard time because she's seen me drinking more, and I feel like I need her to do something, but what can she really do?

She can't do anything for you. It isn't her problem, it is yours. Please see a doctor about your depression and mention your drinking. Anti-depressants won't do a bit of good if you continue to drink. Alcohol is a depressant, as you probably know. Many times, when we quit drinking, the depression will lift natually. If not, then the doctor can probably help, but not if you are still drinking.

4MyMel

Thanks for the replies. I know that my gf can't solve my problems, I hope that wasn't implied in my post. I do want her to be part of this with me. Is there anything that I can ask of her? or is this my battle to fight?

suki44883

My opinion is that it is your battle to fight and her decision as to whether or not she wants to be a part of it, and she can change her mind later if it's more than she can handle. You have to be doing it for YOU, not for her.

Opivotal

Without addressing your depression you are gonna have a difficult time. Your GF will not be able to pull you through. This is something you have to address with your Doctor. Alcohol made my depression unbearable. Seems to me you have the answers and can't put them in place. Your looking for someone else to "fix" you....I did the same thing. Unfortunately, I was wasting my energy on "hoping" not doing something to help myself. One doesn't just "snap" out of true depression. You have to muster up the energy to get some help. Maybe your GF can drive you to the Doctor? Putting the alcohol down would be my first step. I wish you the best.

IMHO ...yes, this is your battle. Your GF can support you but can't do it for you.

sugarbear1

I would stop drinking. Drinking will interfere with anti-depressive medication.

Stick around. Try staying stopped!

4MyMel

She did tell me that she wants to be part of it and help me in any way she can. I just don't know what she can do. She asks me and I just stare at her not knowing what to say.

I don't think I have clinical depression. I watched my mother go through it and I know what it looks like. Also, I took the screening quiz and it's not terrible. I know that quitting drinking, coming completely clean to myself and my gf, starting exercising and getting a hobby will bring me out of it, I just can't seem to get going.

sugarbear1

Have you tried aa? Al anon for gf?

4MyMel

I've tried AA, not al-anon.

Aegian

Make an appointment to see your Doc and when you are there, be HONEST with him/her about your alcohol consumption. Alcohol is a depressant and can and will interfere with anti-depressants, so the Doc needs to know exactly what they are dealing with or you could find yourself in an even worse position.

Obviously, quitting the booze needs to be a major consideration if you ever want to break this cycle. If the Doc isn't trained to assist you with that component get recommendations from him/her and set a game plan for regular appointments if they put you on meds as your need/dosage will likely dramatically change once you have the booze out of the equation.

sugarbear1

If you go to aa, your girlfriend can go to al anon. Both of you will have a serene life together. Just a suggestion.

eJoshua

I think you need to quit drinking and get treated for your depression. You said it yourself, you know what to do, so go do it!

We are here to help you along the way, but you are the one that needs to make the changes in your life. Best wishes,

artsoul

Hi 4MyMe -

I think one of the worst things about drinking (at least for me) is the mental/emotional part. The longer I drank, the more I felt like you described: depressed, anxious and unmotivated. I truly believe alcohol wears us down in so many ways and we often don't know the toll it's taking until we get sober.

I hope you give sobriety another try - it sounds like you've got a lot going for you.....