Update
 

Hi...I just wanted to thank everyone on here so much for keeping me sane while I await being admitted into treatment...this site has been so wonderful for me as I have been to OTL to drive to a meeting and trying to maintain while awaiting admittance. Anyway, just wanted y'all to know, if a bed opens up before Monday, I will be going in, my family and boyfriend, and even my son's dad, have all been so supportive, probably because, finally, i am being HONEST and asking for the help I NEED. And from you all too. Thank you:) Also, I will most definitely be back to keep you posted on how I am doing once I am home again which will be around Thanksgiving time, unless of course something happens, but if everything happens according to how it should, well, I should be able to post again then and be following an aftercare program and doing a 90 in 90 (which I was ALWAYS told to do but NEVER DID) (cuz of COURSE I KNEW BETTER!) Well, you may see me on here till then till Monday, but hopefully I will get in sooner, just wanted to say thanks again for everyone's support...

also, am so having thoughts about treatment, have been to this place befor and tho I KNOW it is what I need, and that I can and WILL do it, it is so daunting, it is no picnic, it is very regimented, it really breaks you down to build you up, which is what I know I need at this point, but still, not really having second thoughts, but, uh, not so looking forward to the process, rather the oputcome, so words of encouragement are welcome, such as, stop being a spoiled brat and be happy you can even be medically detoxed and have treatment and the so forth...which is what I've been telling myself...but kinder words of encouragemnt as well...thank you!

Misskris,

Wow 90 days to just concentrate on you and getting sober. Luxury!!!!.
I have never been to rehab but if needed, I would certainly go. Good on you. Make the most of it. What are you packing? (book clothes and stuff)?
All the best
CaiHong

Yeah, the rehab is 28 days, and then you do aftercare, which is an outpatient program, and the 90 in 90 is 90 meetings in 90 days, which means going to an AA meeting every day for 3 months:)

It sounds like you have the right mindset! I was only in for 30 days and the first couple of weeks were very hard for the reasons you described. After I adjusted to the schedule I started to make connections to the people there. I really started to get into the flow of it the last week or so. I hope to never go again, but I'm so glad I did. In retrospect, I think I would have liked to stay or 90 though, but I couldn't afford it at the time.

Best advice I have is to try to get into the flow of the place and don't fight it. Try to make friends with people there and find people you can talk to/hang out with. I don't know if there is a blackout period for your treatment center, but the one that I went to didn't allow you to talk to anyone from the outside for the first week, and that was a lot harder than I thought it would be.

Try to bring books! After the first week the first thing I did was call my parents and tell them to bring as many books as they could carry. I'm not much of a TV watcher, so I spent a lot of time reading.

Try to enjoy yourself! It's going to be your time to really focus on your mental health. When I look back, I really almost think of that time like it was a vacation -- a chance to call a "time out" on life and sort out a lot of crap.

Best wishes to you, I hope you learn a lot.

what is so great about reahb is they detox you in a medically controlled way so you are comfortable and won't, like, die, but then it's kind of like being in an institution which is a little harsh, and I know, I'm willful and spoiled, so that's what makes it hard.

yeah Josh, they do have a 'blackout period' but this h#ll of a bender I have put myself on??? Sheesh, I think I will be sleeping thru it on phenobarbitol...it's the worst I've EVER EVER been...I could go to a halfway house after if they say I should, but man, it's a toughie as I have my son and all, still, I am soooooo lucky to have my family, my son's dad, and my boyfriend to be so suppotive, and at this point, I've proven without a doubt that I cannot EVER drink and whatever I have been doing DOES NOT WORK, so if that is what they suggest, as much as it will suck, and being that I am THIRTY FIVE- well, you know, I will do it, cuz, like, well, it's the REST OF MY LIFE FOR SIX MONTHS? at this point I surrender..I will do what I have to and what they tell me and am only so grateful that I have my family, my son's dad, and my man to support me, thank God.

i mean the thing is you really have to give in and surrender to the fact that you have a disease I've heard it over and over and ove and over and over and over, but never did, I mean this is the fourth time I will be in treatment and like, yeah, I get it, but till you get it you will fight it, cuz no one wants to give in and admit it, like, c'mon, if you can beat it on your own, who wouldn't wanna? I can't beat it and till ya get to that point ya just don't get it, and I FINALLY get it.

I've been to inpatient twice and both times, once I started sobering up, the first thing I wanted to do was get the hell out of there by any means possible. But I stuck with it both times and didn't want to leave at the end of it. I'm happy that you're getting this opportunity Misskris. Embrace it for the blessing that it is and do what you need to do to make the rest of your life worth living. I'm glad you finally understand surrender. Looking forward to hearing more from you when you get back.

--Fenris.

I never have before but sure as heck do now, thanks, Fenris:)

It's somewhat liberating actually, after trying to 'keep it up' for so many many FREAKING YEARS!!!!