peaceful1

Woke up this morning and said my prayers, then started thinking of how my life has changed since I stopped worshipping a bottle of wine everynight. My life has improved in every way....there is not one aspect of my life that has not been affected. I was never in jail because of alchohol, or rehab, never had a DUI, no lost jobs or relationships.

I just lived a life of quiet despair, always telling myself that I wasn't good enough, believing that I was different than everyone else....that I wasn't acceptable, smart, pretty enough etc.....I drank every night to shut off the noise in my head that was torturing me on a daily basis. Now that I've stopped drinking those thoughts have disappeared and I can't help but wonder..... was I drinking to block out those thoughts, or were those thoughts occcurring because I was drinking? I've been doing it so long I don't know.....but I am so grateful to be free.

least

My life too has changed for the better so much it's amazing. I too used to live a life of "quiet desperation" but since I got sober I don't feel that despair anymore.

Thank you for your positive message.

24hrsAday

i hear you on the noise in my head thing peaceful1 and how that is now much better.. drinking was an Elevator that only took me Down.. never Up! good post..

endlesspatience

It's interesting to note that because alcohol is a depressant, we don't realise when we're in its grip the power it has over our mood. I think the problem for me is that once I've had a certain amount of time sober, I then forget the depressive power of the drug and start to tell myself that it's an uplifting mood enhancing drug. Then I think I'll go back and give it one more try. The result is always horrible.

Anna

That's a great post and I'm glad you're doing so well!

instant

Peaceful. Remarkably I have found the same thing!! I have so much empty space in my mind now to play in and do productive things with!!

goodcheer

thank you peaceful1. your post helps me immensely. i can relate to the need to worship a bottle of wine. i have become a slave to wine, needing it more than i have needed the people in my life, organizing my schedule around my drinking. now that i am six days sober, i am sleeping through the night and wake up feeling well rather than ill. i realize i had been either drunk or hungover all the time, never feeling healthy. i thought that was my normal state, but now i am starting to see that there is peace and health possible in freedom from alcohol. i am glad you are feeling better, and i appreciate your post as it gives me hope.

MrSilver

My life has been happier since I dumped the drinks.

Hevyn

That's wonderful to read, peaceful. Things will just keep getting better.

Dee74

Thanks for that post peaceful1
I identify with the life of quiet despair - I thought it would always be that way with me....but nope

D

foodie1

Wow that's a great post, thank you for sharing!!

LSNP

You know, the number of people who drink is astounding to me. Two girls at work just shared that they have to have their nightly bottle of wine. Blows me away that they think it is ok. Laugh about it. So many people think wine is so innocent. It's not. And I'm here to tell all of them that a bottle of wine a night is getting drunk every night. Wine is strong. It has a "nice" reputation.

I ran with a bunch of women for a year or so. Had lots and lots of "friends." Thing is, it was always a drunk. When I stopped the first time, I lost them all.... and I fully realized that I have NOBODY I can hang with sober. Recently lost my stepmother due to the vicious things she said to me one day when she was drunk. They weren't drunk words, though. They were unfiltered truth. I'm so tired of being alone but I am also tired of extending my boundaries in a desperate attempt to keep people, even those who are not good for me.

Sorry. Went off on a rant.

lushly

Wine is the modern womens' little helper. I drank gallons and gallons of the stuff over the years. It gave me energy to to do my second shift. It was a mellow "me "time alone and with friends. It then became my everything, till my life was no bigger than the wine box I was drinking from. One of my last drinks was from a wine box I had in my purse. (They make small "To Go" boxes now. What a stroke of marketing genius for an wino like me. Thank you for the post. I have been free from it for 5 months. It is worth the work to remain unencumbered too. I remember at one time acting like I gave a sh*t about the kind and vintage.Thank you wine industry for making my alcoholism hip. Here's to feeling OK....yeah