ForLove

I don't have much of a point in posting this except to say that now is the time when I struggle the most. I've done my fair share of daytime drinking but I'm typically a late night binger. As I try to wind down for the day and reflect a little bit, the anxiety builds and that voice starts telling me that alcohol is there. These are my scary moments. I do fine during the day with little to no thoughts of drinking but as soon as the sun goes down, all hell breaks loose. My mind races and I know oblivion is a short drive away. I don't want to do it anymore and I'm going to stay sober tonight. Does anyone have this problem? I guess I'm just trying to occupy myself.

sugarbear1

Hard candy lollypops. Try one. with a glass of water. Replace the sugar, keep up the arm movements. Ice cream. It takes time to break old habits. Read. Journal. Do something to keep a bit busy.

Give yourself time to heal!

ForLove

Thanks for your suggestions. I'm going to take a long, hot shower for now and then try some of what you recommended. Thanks again.

Deserto

ForLove, You're not alone. That's exactly my problem. I'm only on Day Two but everything is fine and dandy (especially during the weekdays) until 5 pm or whenever I'm done with work. Then, it's all thoughts of drinking. Oddly enough I find if I make it til 8 pm things quiet down til about 10 pm... and then yeah, the late night hours are really hard, cause I could usually drink pretty freely after the wife had gone to bed.

The only solution I can think of is to read these threads and try to go to bed at a reasonable hour. Why stay up late wrestling demons?

sugarbear1

I had coffee at 6 pm...it really messes with the routine I had started. Going to listen to a speaker mp3 & sleep with the cat....

eJoshua

Well it probably isn't the best long term solution, but there are tons of free arcade games on the internet. Sometimes when I'm feeling antsy I'll play those for an hour or so. Keeps my mind busy.

Stay strong!

StPeteGrad

I can sure remember those days! Our addiction is very patient and will come at us when it can hurt us the most.

For me, a bedtime routine is absolutely critical. In fact, a full daily routine for the first 90 days was critical.

In order that I could slow my mind down I had to make sure I had everything I needed nutrition-wise. A good dinner, a snack (taper down the sugar -but I was a sugar fiend at first) would help me know that my body had what it needed so I could focus on the mind.

Since I'm an AA'r, reading the stories in the Big Book was great to settle my mind and help me sleep. I still read every night. There are a lot of great recovery books that help my mind when I feel out of control. Night time is when I need to stare down the elephant in the room.

Hang in there - it will get better and a routine will help.

Scolova

ForLove, there is no way for me to count all of my 11:55 beer runs (12:55 Saturday nights of course) lol. Generally if I could get past that I could then relax as I never go to bars and clubs to drink, thank God. I'm now three weeks sober and it feels like it's the first time in my entire life, but in reality probably more like 10 or so years.
I buy those big 48 packs of Kroger or Lipton pitcher size tea bags and make (and drink) a gallon+ a day, I add about 3/4 cup of sugar to each batch and I believe that has really helped me. One, for having something to sip or chug that doesn't cost much but tastes good, Two the sugar fills the void left behind from the alcohol.
Wishing you the best.

least

I was an all day every day wino, but I found it very helpful to come here and read others' stories and post my own feelings. Just knowing I wasn't alone helped so much. :ghug3

ForLove

I'm sure many of us deal with those late night demons. Many folks also have to deal with daytime demons, which must be horrible. Then, as the diseases progresses, you get the 24-7 demons. I guess it can get really bad really fast.

Anyways, I'm fine today. Used a few different strategies to quiet my mind. Reading here was definitely one of them. As someone else said, thinking through the drinking and realizing how I'd feel tomorrow morning if I drank helped immensely.

It's strange though, once the urge to drink subsided, my mind wandered to all kinds of negative things in my life. Past confrontations in my life, current squabbles I have with people, times I feel I should have reacted more aggressively in a confrontation, etc. Then, I get all hyped up and can't sleep. That, most likely, has something to do with why I drank to begin with: to quiet that anger I harbored towards other people. Interesting thing because I was never a mean drunk.

Anyways, thanks everyone for the suggestions. I'll be around here. Waking up sober and fresh sure is nice.

doggonecarl

Abstinence is not drinking. Recovery is dealing with those things you mentioned without drinking.

Good luck.