mazza

Hi everyone,

One of the things I have found a little difficult is trying to explain my reason for not drinking to people..I seem to try and 'fit' my reason into something each individual might understand. For instance, my running friends I say 'Im in training'..and its easily accepted, but to my other friends who are still heavier drinkers that really doesnt wash too well..

I get comments like 'are you having a mid-life crisis?' and 'only alcoholics stop drinking'..saying I want to be a better person or improve my life is like an attack to a drinker as it implies their life ISNT..

Any help here guys?

eJoshua

I would say "none of your business", unless they were a close friend.

eJoshua

Welcome to SR, btw!

defyinggravity

I usually say something about it interacting badly with medications...but usually people don't ask why.

Dee74

Hi mazza

I used to think I owed people this big excuse or explanation - I don't.
What I do, or don't do, is my business.

'I don't drink' or 'I don't drink anymore' really is all anyone else needs to know.

If you feel you need to add more - just say it's for your health, or that you feel happier not drinking...both are true but allow you to keep your business to yourself

D

kicknNscreamin

I said, "for my health," "because it's not fitting into my lifestyle anymore," to casual friends. To my true friends, I said, "because I became physically dependent and it was either quit or drink all day, every day."

Zencat

I tell people that I'm allergic to alcohol. Every time I drink, I break out in handcuffs.

mazza

I guess I could use any of those reasons, but I particularly like 'it doesnt fit into my lifestyle anymore'..and I suppose over time I will work out the weeds from the flowers on my friends list. The heaviest drinkers are (obviously) the most opposed to the change, but its not like I dont enjoy life or Im dead for gods sake..IM STILL FUNNY DAMMIT!

tallcactus

I have no problem telling people that I don't drink, I tell them the truth.
I usually say that I abused alcohol and that it got me into a lot of trouble and nearly lost my career, because of it. Never had I heard any negativity, usually I hear along the lines of, "I think I drink too much," or "maybe I need to quit too." I think people respect the honesty.

Anna

Well, I am firmly with Dee on this one.

You don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you're not drinking. A 'No, thanks' should be enough to answer anyone's question.

lisa36

I have said all kinds of things... I am cutting down, I am on medication right now, I haven't had enough water today so I'll stick to water tonight. It helps me get people off my back. I don't want to draw any attention to myself so that's what I do. I feel comfortable with this. Eventually, I will say "I don't drink" and leave it at that. But I have to transition into that since everyone knows I do drink right now. Good luck.

doggonecarl

If explaining why you aren't drinking is such a problem, I have to wonder what kind of situations are you in where the topic even comes up? In early recovery, I found I had to remove myself from events where there was drinking...hence, no need to explain to anybody why I wasn't. So be careful, if you have to tell people aren't drinking it means someone is, and risk to drink yourself is present.

Good luck.

Humbled77

I think I would spend more time with my running friends. It's a fact of life that the people we surround ourselves with are both a reflection and influence on ourselves. I hang out at times with a crowd that plays as hard as it parties. None of them would ever question my response of, "I'm drying out" or "getting healthy so I can keep up with the youngsters". If they did, then I would drop them down to the B list.

kicknNscreamin

haha, Mezza! I'm still funny too, damnit!! I quit drinking, I didn't quit living =)

kicknNscreamin

Zen, I like that, "every time I drink I break out in handcuffs." I wish I had something similar to say since I've not experienced any legal trouble due to drinking.

smacked

I don't care whether or not anyone else drinks that I know.. not sure why they'd care whether or not I did. I just say I don't drink, I'm a non-drinker, or 'no thank you'. Then again, once I quit drinking like an alcoholic, I also stopped associating with people who prioritize alcohol in their lives (much less mine!). People really care less about us than we think, most of the time.

smacked

Hey that was sort of trippy.. my post jumped up on top of Sharon's. Still workin on that lil glitch I take it?

aasharon90

There are many who are allergic to shell fish or
nuts like peanuts who get deathly ill or break out
in hives.

You may not find those people at crawfish boils
or bakeries.....

Same thing for an Alcoholic or drug addict. Since
I have an allergy to alcohol, i cant drink it are i will
get sick and die. Alcohol is poison and to drink poison
i surely die.

Today i dont have to explain why i dont do anything
to anyone. You can try and explain why we cant
drink sucessfully to a non alcoholic till you r blue
in the face and believe me they will never understand
because if they r not a true alcoholic then they will
never understand. It takes being an alcoholic or drug
addict to know one.

Reset

If pressed (which is rare), I say I decided to stop to see what would happen.

Aegian

For the one-off, don't know them well, nunya business conversations:

- Trying to lose weight
- Diagnosed with GERD (heartburn) and can't drink anymore
- Conflicts with medications I am on
- Can't do it anymore like when I was a kid - makes me feel like crap now
- Saving money for (insert item/vacation)
- I think I may be pregnant (that one is always fun, specially if you are a guy!)
- Designated Driver duty tonight
- Early morning activity tomorrow (meeting, road race, whatever)
- Just getting over the (flu, mono, cold, sinus infection)


To the people I know, I just say that the booze was simply getting the better of me and that was not acceptable any longer, so I quit.
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