mymichelle3278

I am the wife of an addict-alcohol, crack, pills...I have been with J for 6 years with 5 years of marriage. Out of the 6 years, I think I got a total of 1 year out of him. I became an addict to him and his addiction. When I heard that I thought people were insane! I went to alanon meetings because I wanted to understand this disease and I was hoping to find a cure. I found out that I didn't cause it, I can't control it, and I can't cure it...how frustrated I was! Atleast I got to meet and talk with people who were in the same boat as me though. My husband has been sick with this disease for atleast 12 years, he's 26 now. I gave up everything for him thinking that if he just could see how much I loved him he would stop, but that wasn't the case. The more I stuck around and the more I gave emotionally and physically, the more he took. I always got so angry when he'd be out using because I felt that he didn't care and didn't love the kids and I like we loved him. I am just now learning that he does love us deep within, but his love for dope is stronger. Dope is the damn demon! About a year ago he was released from jail for domestic violence for the umpteenth time and within 10 hours he was right back in. He went to jail, I took the kids and we drove half way across the country to be back with my family. J took everything from us-even the relationship we had with his family, I felt alone. He was released about 6 months ago and in that time has had 3 different addresses. I decided about 2 months ago that it was time that I had to divorce this addiction (not him, the addiction). He received papers about a month ago and ever since I've only heard from him one time. About a week ago he took his security deposit from the room he was in and went to use. Nobody has heard from him since...nobody. I know that he was using the alcohol and drugs to cope with what he was feeling-that's what he does, he tries to numb himself. But his mother and I are very worried, his children miss his phone calls, and I miss my old J...there's been talk of reporting him missing in the event that something terrible does happen to him. That and prayer are all that we have left!
Michelle

Dee74

I'm really sorry for your situation Michelle. I understand you being worried - thats a human emotion - but I'm still really glad to read you're moving on.

I hope you'll hear news soon that he's at least OK.

We have a Family and Friends forum here you may also be interested in, for more support:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...stance-abusers

Welcome to SR
D