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How do you know for sure?

Old 10-04-2011, 08:14 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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I can understand where you are coming from because I too, knew I had a problem with alcohol, but wasn't convinced I was an 'alcoholic'. I had not lost my job, I still had nice things, still married, etc. But I realized that I was using alcohol to escape from dealing with life issues. The problem was that the life issues were still there after I stopped drinking for that day. It did become an issue and I knew that even though I could walk away from it for a day, few weeks, even a couple of months, something would happen to trigger me back to that drink to escape what I couldn't face in life. That's when I knew I had a problem - that my life had become unmanageable because I couldn't completely walk away from the alcohol. I have now been working a program now for 2 weeks now and it has done a world of wonders for me.

Only you can decide if you want to completely walk away or try the tricks and experiments. I wish you luck on your journey and peace with whatever decision you make.
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Old 10-04-2011, 10:48 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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I got a lot of great information from the book "Under the Influence".

There are many yet's I managed to avoid, for today, but one thing in "Under the Influence" really helped me get some perspective. I had trouble relating to many of the most heart-wrenching stories I've heard, but a section of the book made some things clear:

For instance, "hitting bottom" and "functional alcoholic" are now terms I don't really use any longer. At times, in a recovery context they may seem useful, but for me, I no longer think of my drinking days as "functional alcoholism" but "middle-stage" alcoholism. I was on the verge of losing more than I had realized. And some things I had lost were not known to me (are not known to me.)

People tend to avoid problem drinkers and will not let on to the drinker that from a social point of view they are having problems. You may never know how drink has damaged reputation and standing.

On those questionnaires, one of the questions should be "Did you look for a questionnaire online to see if you're an alcoholic?"

Glad you found us. Good luck!
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Old 10-04-2011, 10:56 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Denial is part of this illness (and I've seen some very severe alcoholics still in denial about their condition, they don't think they fit the 'stereotype' etc). It's difficult to think clearly about all the issues, early in recovery. After a few months, I noticed a great change in my thinking - I was no longer spending most of my time preoccupied or obsessed with alcohol, to the exclusion of so much else, when I wasn't actually drinking. That made it hit home to me just how dependent I had been on it. Alcoholism follows a progressive pattern for many, that's how it was for me. At first it seemed a positive experience, it became increasingly negative as time went on but I spent a long time trying to chase how it was at the beginning. I'd quit for awhile to try and lower my tolerance, then try some 'controlled' drinking again, it always backfired for me. That's how I knew. It's just not worth it, all the energy and focus I wasted. You don't have to compare yourself to others in recovery. When I went to AA, I found it hard to relate to some of the stories... but I took them as a warning to myself of how it could be if I continued.
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Old 10-04-2011, 05:36 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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I can't tell you how to know for sure, but I will tell you a little bit about my experience.

I have been browsing this forum for a few months now, because I was concerned about my drinking. Nothing really bad had ever happened*, like a DUI or an arrest, but I was feeling like it might be a problem. I vowed to cut back and was glad I was just even reading up about whether or not it was a problem.

Without even realizing how bad it was getting I was drinking more and more, feeling more anxious, still thinking all I needed was to take a break. Then really bad stuff happened. Like getting arrested bad stuff. Like getting 5 staples put in my head for a self inflicted head wound. I had no idea that's where I was headed when I first started browsing here, and without trying to have too many regrets I wish I'd taken the whole thing more seriously the second I googled "alcohol abuse".

I was really good at fooling myself, it's really worth it to try and be as honest as you can with yourself about your concerns.

*just this short time sober has shown me that lots of bad stuff was already happening, I was just too deep in denial/too drunk to acknowledge it
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Old 10-04-2011, 11:11 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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I have always been very selfish/self-centered, so I had absolutely no idea to which the extent my drinking was affecting those around me. It was somewhat startling to find out actually.

Katelyn, welcome to SR. I hope you make the right decision when it comes to drinking. I have seen a lot of people keep drinking, waiting for that other shoe to drop, so to speak, only to find out that death was waiting for them.
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Old 10-04-2011, 11:24 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Welcome...

A interesting thing you might want to consider...why is drinking important to you?
Millions of people don't drink for various reasons and they think that is normal..
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