Sigma

I have been hanging out in the 2 weeks and under thread off and on, slipped a couple times, but wanted to join the September thread, slipped the last day of that month.

So here is a fresh start and a fresh thread for October 2011. If anyone wishes to join me, come on in. I have always liked October, even as a kid. Fall time, Halloween, love this month.

I have heard people say that one should just treat themselves sometimes, get yourself a gift. October 1'st I decided to give myself a gift, the gift of sobriety.

Hopefully this can be an awesome group.

Ozgirl

Good luck, it is so worth it!

Coco210

That is a great way to think of it my friend...a gift! Like you, my favorite time of year is upon us. I want to be in good shape in more ways than one for thanksgiving and christmas. Welcome, and keep the faith!

BoozeFree

Thanks for startin an Oct class Sigma and count me in!
Today is day 2 for me after a handful of failed attempts in the past. I wont give up though. The longest time I had was 89 days that I thru away around last march or something. Had 20something days up until a lil over a week ago and so now here I am, trying again..
Yesterday was pretty bad, todays been slightly better. Not liking feeling hot 24/7 and the acheness though but going to tough it out. Drinking can't be an option for me.

DarkDays

Hi all. Been Long time lurker and have received some useful advice in the past to no avail.

I am 45 years old been drinking 30 years, last 10 the worst by far that's when I stated drinking wine at home and alone when everyone was in bed etc. I have had a few sober stretches, longest just over 4 months and that was through reading these forums and nothing else. But life is a rinse and repeat cycle off drinking most nights, not getting blotto but a bottle of red and maybe a couple of beers, waking at 4 am and questioning myself why I do this and lay there worrying about my health and Knowing that life could be so much better without this crap. Then maybe I have a couple of days off and then I am back doing it again, I really hate it I am totally sick of feeling morose /black thoughts and just lethargic.
Yesterday me and Wife rode around Richmond Park on our bikes , it was lovely and sunny But I still felt groggy because of a bottle and Half of red I drank on the Saturday night ( wife thinks only half a bottle, because I hide some and drink when she goes to bed) My Mrs teetotal, had one glass of wine in about 16 years, never liked the taste and never bothered with it...So its not like I have a binge drinking partner but I still poison myself daily. When I look back at my life its marred with alcohol, the problems and everything bad that has happened is attached to this vice, so sad that I have never had a holiday or been to a function without getting drunk or nearly drunk I even hate the early buzz alcohol gives me, just hate the whole stupid thing. Our Only daughter at home for probably two more years before she goes to university, I really want these two years of my life sober so she can see her real Dad not who I am now having to gulp wine/beer down at every opportunity, I am not really emotional about many things but I am sad over this and know I have to do this and know my life will get so much better, I had glimpses of how good I felt on my 4 month sober stint .

Anyway hello all, I am going to post and read daily. Day1.

Thank you.

Sigma

Welcome to the group, we can do this together, as a team.

BoozeFree & DarkDays, both of you have beat me in time off from drinking. I have not made it 3 weeks in around 10 years. I managed a DUI then and had to quit for awhile, made it around 6 weeks. If I could make 3 weeks, that would be a milestone. I have had 2 weeks a couple of times and that’s it.

I'm glad to see you both join; sounds like you are like me and not going to give up quitting. Hopefully we can re-visit these first few posts a year from now and look back, but for now I say lets do it day by day.

Thanks

Dee74

welcome guys - lets make this a great month!

D

instant

Hey Guys. Thought I would drop by with some encouragement. I am 140 plus days. 35 years of drinking. Maximum 6 months sober in the past, many other failed attempts. My story is similar to Dark Days. My options were shrinking and I was just waiting for the inevitable disaster to take me down to the next level. So much for being high functioning. I have a new lease on life. This time I appreciate it !!

It can take a while for things to adjust and it is a steep learning curve. With Dee on your team you are in good hands.

Dee74

thanks for the wrap Instant lol

How's everyone going?

D

DarkDays

Well its over 24 hours since I had my last Glass of wine, I have to do this I do not want to waste any more time with alcohol. Most of Family know I like a drink but do not how bad it had become with me, know one new about my secret drinking although the Mrs has found a few empty bottles which I had hidden and forgot to get rid of the evidence, I remember we had a big row about it and I promised it would never happen again, that was 3 years ago,so awful the lies and my absurd ways of smuggling drink into the house and the excuses i have been making to pop out at 10pm at night, truly sad.

Yes Cravings today, nothing bad but I know from many attempts to stop before that the early days are ok for me, its a week plus from now when I feel real good that the real voices will start in my head. But I am working AVRT real hard and am going to be ready, I have to escape now, if i do not it may be years before I ever have the motivation as I do now, not too sure how bad the damage of 30 years drinking has done to my insides, but I have a chance now to end the abuse, I must take it.

Sigma

Your story sounds a lot like mine DarkDays. I also have a wife that can go without a drink forever. The only time she has is when everyone else has at a gathering or something. She has carted me around to buy more beer, put up with a lot. I have a son that’s older and he has started the drinking at an early age. He has had a couple scrapes with it, but nothing major.

I am wrapping up day 3 here, and this was an unbalanced day. I felt good until the last part of the work day. I had a tiff with a co-worker last week, and today all seemed forgotten (for the most part). I decided on the way home to grab a few beers to say thanks that all was well. I got 2 blocks from the store and veered away, backtracking to get home.

Now the crazy thing is, I am not usually a Monday drinker, so this still has me upset I came soo close. Another thing I am noticing is that since I have been really trying hard to quit, I am having more depression after a slip. The funny thing I have noticed is that when I have had say a 3 day binge, after I feel so physically off, that I don't notice how bad mentally I am. But if I have just a 1 day slip, I don't feel so bad physically, but mentally I am off circuit for a few days. This includes depression, worry, obsessive thoughts, etc. This clears up after about 5 days. I don't know if on the long binges I have produced more endorphins or something? But the one day slip is really bad heady wise.

Well, anywhoo, I did make it and I look forward to getting through day 4 (tomorrow), day 5 is where things usually pick up for me.

Thanks for listening.

GoMan

Dark Days- Good luck! The hiding booze and worrying about if I stashed the empty bottle from the night before so my wife wouldn't find it. Sleeping like crap. Insane! Keep fighting the good fight. My oldest went off to college three years ago. They grow up fast.

BoozeFree

Welcome Darkdays! I also am way to familiar with hiding the booze. I would hide it in my huge purse or wait for someone to leave to use the bathroom or something and run to my car and sneak it in. Glad I dont have to sneak anything in anymore.

Day 4 today and feeling a little better. I woke up this morning feeling nauseous randomly. And still sweating at night. Stomach aches not quit as bad though.

humblestudent

Hi folks! I just posted over in the newcomers thread too. Today is day 2 for me. I have been stuck in a vicious cycle of binge drinking for a good 20 years. I managed to quit for 4 months almost a year and a half ago, and then went insane and thought I could drink again like a normal person, and started up again. Needless to say, that little experiment did not work out well.

Because mine is a weekend thing, I basically detox every Sunday night. It's hell physically and mentally. Today, oddly, I woke up feeling fantastic, after feeling like death warmed over all day yesterday. The first thought I had today upon waking was, "Oh my god, it feels so good not to be detoxing/hungover..."

I just don't want to feel that way ever again. I just cannot.stand.it.anymore. I'm willing to do what it takes to make it stop.

Edited to add: That little experiment lasted a year and a half. UGH!

Thanks, and I look forward to getting to know you all!
Humble

Tiggy

OK so now Im in the right place, Im 10 days sober and looking forward to another day, 1 day at a time

stevie88

Ok im in with the october crew,I was in the class of september and also august but i kept falling off the waggon once i got to 5 days.....Im gonna be honest and say that fell off the waggon on friday and im finding it hard to get back on,i have been hungover everyday since friday and also suffering from bad stomach cramps and only a beer will take the pain away.....My plan today is to just have a few,i usually drink 15 beers a day today i have only bought 8 so that i dont feel hungover tomorow.I really want to quit tomorow as i really need to start looking after myself,i weighed myself earlier and i was 125lbs which aint a lot when im 5"10...I just wanna get back off the booze and get my scrawny ass back in the gym.Hope you guys will welcome me aboard...Many thanks,steve.....

humblestudent

Hi, Stevie!! We can do this. I know I am so pumped up today - but Friday and Saturday will be my first real test. I hope I will make the right choice when the time comes. I am trying to create a plan in my mind for doing that.

Hope you get through the next few days feeling a bit better.

Keep posting!!

Adamm1987

Happy to be in the class of October, greetings everyone, all the best :-)

soberwingz

Four days sober here after years of this mess. I am slowly beginning to see how all those years my life was constantly consumed with this sickness. The hiding of bottles...different liquor stores I would go to because I was ashamed they would peg me as a worthless drunk. Hoping the neighbors wouldn't see all the empty cans and bottles in the trash. Hiding my drinking from my wife and the panic I would feel if I didn't have enough liquor in the house to get through until tomorrow .

Being sober feels like freedom. Maybe this is what the serenity thing is all about.

October class...please count me in.

And thanks to all for the support. Its nice to know someone out there "gets" me.

ventura47

I also love October, The fall, Indian Summer with the Santa Ana winds, My birthday and a new start. My sober date is September 24th but October is my sober month and my month for growth.