Support outside/new friendship?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Leeds
Posts: 5
Support outside/new friendship?
Just a thought.
I am treating my alcoholism separately to my drug addictions. Bit starnge maybe but it's how I handle it. Two years sober from both though I am a little concerned about my temptaion to drink more than temptaion to go back to cocaine. Simple reason that for me personally it's easier to get hold of booze as I cut off ties with old friends. I'm only worried as I approach my two year sobriety that I finally got a job in a shop down the road a few months ago and have my own little flat now...all good but I feel suddenly very alone and I've no, ok few family connections. Hopeing that on here I can meet some new friends; virtual one ok but friends. I have a few from AA and NA meetings but they seem to come and go?
I just realised that I’m not keen on my own company but I’m not sure, I feel a bit shy about meeting people? I just don’t want to struggle and I want to keep busy. Work consists of a family who run it so I don’t really see friendship building there, bit strange. Umm I don’t really know what I’m asking for advice here and will prolly get now response which is ok.
Anyway thanks for reading.
James x
I am treating my alcoholism separately to my drug addictions. Bit starnge maybe but it's how I handle it. Two years sober from both though I am a little concerned about my temptaion to drink more than temptaion to go back to cocaine. Simple reason that for me personally it's easier to get hold of booze as I cut off ties with old friends. I'm only worried as I approach my two year sobriety that I finally got a job in a shop down the road a few months ago and have my own little flat now...all good but I feel suddenly very alone and I've no, ok few family connections. Hopeing that on here I can meet some new friends; virtual one ok but friends. I have a few from AA and NA meetings but they seem to come and go?
I just realised that I’m not keen on my own company but I’m not sure, I feel a bit shy about meeting people? I just don’t want to struggle and I want to keep busy. Work consists of a family who run it so I don’t really see friendship building there, bit strange. Umm I don’t really know what I’m asking for advice here and will prolly get now response which is ok.
Anyway thanks for reading.
James x
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Texas, a state of mind
Posts: 380
I found it helpful to get some new activities: take a class, volunteer, start an exercise program.
For me, my social skills and friend-making talents were somewhat impaired by years of lying and sneaking around. So I took bits of companionship where I found it: a lady out walking her dog, I say "Hi what a cute dog!" and she is interested in talking about how wonderful is her dog. I can do this without fear of blowing booze in her face. nice!
Or I chat with the neighbors whom I used to avoid because I was always carrying sacks of vodka into my house.
Be prepared to find companionship in little things, and give yourself time to develop a more open personality, no longer hindered by the darkness.
Best wishes to you and in a year you will look back on this post of yours with a remembrance of feeling lonely but no longer! I predict.
For me, my social skills and friend-making talents were somewhat impaired by years of lying and sneaking around. So I took bits of companionship where I found it: a lady out walking her dog, I say "Hi what a cute dog!" and she is interested in talking about how wonderful is her dog. I can do this without fear of blowing booze in her face. nice!
Or I chat with the neighbors whom I used to avoid because I was always carrying sacks of vodka into my house.
Be prepared to find companionship in little things, and give yourself time to develop a more open personality, no longer hindered by the darkness.
Best wishes to you and in a year you will look back on this post of yours with a remembrance of feeling lonely but no longer! I predict.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Leeds
Posts: 5
:o)
Thank you everybody!
Bit dippy that I am. Of course I think I'll show some interest in volunteer work...guess I just thought they wouldn't take somebody like me lol! I did think about investing into a course or something, learn another language maybe or a music course but I'll need to save up a little bit first. I'm just out of touch I think and have this odd feeling people will just know I've been an addict even though I'm clean and sober; odd I know and I know I'm at the best ehalth I've been in years so it's alian to me why I feel this way. It's like starting over and I've not thought about re-making that human interaction yet and building new friendships feel like a hurdle for me but at the moment I just work and come home and watch telly and go to bed... and that's it. Sometimes I'll go for a jog but I'm plugged into my music and just ignore my surroundings. Bit silly really so I thought I would give this online forum a wirl and you are all so amasing. I hope I do find this courage to make new friends, maybe in little steps. Just not used to it all but I'll follow your kind advice, all off you...thank you so much! You have been so kind!!!
James
Bit dippy that I am. Of course I think I'll show some interest in volunteer work...guess I just thought they wouldn't take somebody like me lol! I did think about investing into a course or something, learn another language maybe or a music course but I'll need to save up a little bit first. I'm just out of touch I think and have this odd feeling people will just know I've been an addict even though I'm clean and sober; odd I know and I know I'm at the best ehalth I've been in years so it's alian to me why I feel this way. It's like starting over and I've not thought about re-making that human interaction yet and building new friendships feel like a hurdle for me but at the moment I just work and come home and watch telly and go to bed... and that's it. Sometimes I'll go for a jog but I'm plugged into my music and just ignore my surroundings. Bit silly really so I thought I would give this online forum a wirl and you are all so amasing. I hope I do find this courage to make new friends, maybe in little steps. Just not used to it all but I'll follow your kind advice, all off you...thank you so much! You have been so kind!!!
James
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