joboo

Hello,

So its Friday and I am having a terrible case of complacency. I quit drinking back in late June after almost a year of the relapse/sober-up see-saw. Its been great for the most part. Life has become manageable again. A lot of serendipitous things have happened for me. Physically I look and feel so much better. I'm back in school full time pursuing my dream. However, I have a total lack of people in my life right now.

Most of my friends - whether they were just drinking buddies or have been in my life all along - drink. Fortunately my best friend has been sober for 2+ years and is a great support, but he lives in another city 6 hours away and we only get to see each other about twice a year. We do talk at least three times a week though. Unfortunately everyone I surrounded myself with in my last two years of drinking were just people to drink with so they've all dropped of my radar.

Anyway, during the week it's not bad because I'm super busy in an academic/medical field related program. Its a great source of motivation and I absolutely love it! I like my peers also but outside of class/studying we don't hang out much. So when Friday and Saturday roll around I really start to feel lonely. Plus I live alone. My family lives in the same city as me, but I need more. I also got out of a long-term rerlationship last year so... And I'm in my early early thirties and I just miss having some sort of social life.

What do you all do?

I've been to meetings, have met a few nice people, but no one I have really jibed with. I'm not judgmental at all, but maybe a little slow to warm.

I don't know I'm just ranting. I need to meet some new people.

Thanks!

Mcribb

Hope it works out. You are where you need to be.

VolcomStone51

Yeah, I have been in that exact situation before/still am in that situation. I work as a field engineer and so I have been working out of town this summer, and most likely be doing this for at least a few more years to come. What works/is working for me is just getting out. You can either find something to do like a class (I took up yoga) or just go out to a nearby coffee shop and surf the internet there. What I have noticed is that if I sit home alone I feel lonely and start feeling sorry for myself or dwell on the past. If I am at least out I feel better and interact with people and then when I get home I just relax for a bit and then go to bed. By doing this you'll at least get out of your head and have a much better chance of meeting someone than by staying at home.

Other than this I just got lucky and found a young people's AA meeting in my city and met some really nice people there. Yeah you wont always relate to everyone that much, but it won't hurt to maybe go out for a bite to eat and network and meet other sober people. By hitting a meeting here or there you really wont get to meet everyone in recovery in your area.

-Lastly, I use/used my free time to work out to reward my body after somewhat punishing it......again this may not help you meet people immediately but it will get your self-confidence up and may lead you to try new things which in turn may lead to meeting people. Also, these people, or at least the ones I have met recently, tend to be more productive in life and aren't worried about going to the bar since I meet them doing active things. Take care and I hope you find what you are looking for.

LaFemme

I'm single, in my 30's, all my friends are married with kids, my family is 5 hours away and I work in a field that doesn't have a lot of social interaction...to top it off, I like being social

I take my dogs to the park but days are getting shorter which means longer nights...duh. Last winter I was fixing myself and my house. This winter I am planning on doing stuff. Tonight I went to a free science lecture at a museum (did I mention I'm broke?)...next week I won free tickets to see the dress rehearsal for the Mets opening opera....and after that I will keep looking for more things to do. Am I venturing out of my comfort zone? He'll yes. But it feels good.