"recovering alcoholic"
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 526
"recovering alcoholic"
i hear people who have been sober for years (10 - 20, etc.) still refer to themselves as "recovering alcoholics"...
i am curious as to why? is that an internal reminder to keep yourself in-check?
i'm thinking that after some point -- you have recovered, why still associate yourself with the bad past? (seems like a label puts a damper on progress of your life).
a better "label" would be that one is simply a healthy person, who chooses a sober lifestyle.
p.s. "Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right."
i am curious as to why? is that an internal reminder to keep yourself in-check?
i'm thinking that after some point -- you have recovered, why still associate yourself with the bad past? (seems like a label puts a damper on progress of your life).
a better "label" would be that one is simply a healthy person, who chooses a sober lifestyle.
p.s. "Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right."
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
This is one of those recurring questions Serious.
Away from SR I've never yet had occasion to declare myself recovering or recovered, so it's not a burning issue for me anymore.
I am in recovery today. I hope it will always be that way
D
Away from SR I've never yet had occasion to declare myself recovering or recovered, so it's not a burning issue for me anymore.
I am in recovery today. I hope it will always be that way
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,509
I've been sober for a long time, but I do still say 'recovering alcoholic'.
I had a long history with depression and anxiety for many, many years before I began to drink. I was not a happy person and as I had more demands in my life ie jobs, teenagers, things worsened and I was a miserable person. I began to drink and spent a few years drinking. When I stopped, at a very low point, and it took everything I had, deep in my soul to get up and move forward. By taking that step, I felt like all the negativity in my life had fallen away. I had a chance to live and for the first time in my life, to be at peace. So, I am recovering my life.
I had a long history with depression and anxiety for many, many years before I began to drink. I was not a happy person and as I had more demands in my life ie jobs, teenagers, things worsened and I was a miserable person. I began to drink and spent a few years drinking. When I stopped, at a very low point, and it took everything I had, deep in my soul to get up and move forward. By taking that step, I felt like all the negativity in my life had fallen away. I had a chance to live and for the first time in my life, to be at peace. So, I am recovering my life.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
yes, there seems to be widely differing opinions on this. I can give you mine...I don't believe in the disease concept. I am "recovered" in the sense that I don't drink. ever. But since I was addicted to alcohol, if I drink it then I am "active" in my addiction again. I too like a positive label like "non-drinker", but I am not ashamed to say that I am an addict, since that's what I am. I use the term "in recovery" but for me it doesn't mean I am "always just arms length from a drink." Personally I find that notion ridiculous (and self defeating-just me tho) I like the literal meaning of recover...finding something that was lost. I am finding me, so that's an ongoing lifelong adventure. LOL I'm sure my whole take on this was clear as mud...
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Serious, I agree with you. At the beginning, I found it odd that that is how it works for some successful abstainers, but I don't think I could bear struggling every day with that 'in recovery' aspect. That stuff gets tiring for me, and I don't think I am strong enough to stay sober with willpower alone, even with the belief in a Higher Power.
I hope to be able to someday say, not that I am a recovering alcoholic, but instead that drinking alcohol is something I don't do, and I will never change my mind. Done. No wrestling, no debating, no white knuckles. The thought about having a drink will never make me pick up, because I get to make my decisions, and I have decided. This is my path.
Other approaches are very effective as well; the trick about this sobriety business is to find the approach that speaks to you. Keep looking until you find it.
I hope to be able to someday say, not that I am a recovering alcoholic, but instead that drinking alcohol is something I don't do, and I will never change my mind. Done. No wrestling, no debating, no white knuckles. The thought about having a drink will never make me pick up, because I get to make my decisions, and I have decided. This is my path.
Other approaches are very effective as well; the trick about this sobriety business is to find the approach that speaks to you. Keep looking until you find it.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
I called myself a "recovering alcoholic" for years. And sure enough, I relapsed within 2 months every time. It was like a self-fulfilling prophecy. I felt like I was walking a tight-rope every day and it never got any safer no matter how far I traveled along that tight-rope.
Now I call myself a "recovered" alcoholic because I built a bridge to walk on. I can afford to stumble, zig-zag a little and even whether a storm or two along the way.
Now I call myself a "recovered" alcoholic because I built a bridge to walk on. I can afford to stumble, zig-zag a little and even whether a storm or two along the way.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The Trenches, Texas
Posts: 778
My name is Omega and I am a recoverED alcoholic. A text book was given to me that gives precise, clear cut directions on how some men and women recoverED. It turned out that I suffered from what they suffered from...so I followed directions and was given what they were...a life of abundance in a recoverED state. Am I cured? No, no, daily reprieve contingent on fit spiritual condition <--this is my responsibility.
Experience showed me that folks in the rooms that are "always recovering" usually are not...they don't want to take responsibility for their life. It is divided about half and half, half of them have relapsed, the other half just seem to have no life in them. Who in the heck wants that?!? I needed something a little more for the horrific disease that I have...and that is exactly what I found...220v current turning my you know what inside out!!! Don't take my word for it though...check the text book, "recoverED" is used in it many, many times..."recovering" only once or twice as far as I can tell, and it seems to be talking to the family about alkies in the early, early days of recovery.
Peace
Experience showed me that folks in the rooms that are "always recovering" usually are not...they don't want to take responsibility for their life. It is divided about half and half, half of them have relapsed, the other half just seem to have no life in them. Who in the heck wants that?!? I needed something a little more for the horrific disease that I have...and that is exactly what I found...220v current turning my you know what inside out!!! Don't take my word for it though...check the text book, "recoverED" is used in it many, many times..."recovering" only once or twice as far as I can tell, and it seems to be talking to the family about alkies in the early, early days of recovery.
Peace
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 711
For purposes of positive re-enforcement to my own mind, I think of myself as a non-drinker and non-smoker. I practice this because positive thoughts are what works for me. I have to be my own cheerleader!! lol
If it were to come up in conversation I would probably say I don't drink because I struggle with alcohol, or something of that nature.
If it were to come up in conversation I would probably say I don't drink because I struggle with alcohol, or something of that nature.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Ann Arbor, MI
Posts: 42
Not to take things lightly, but there is a great episode of South Park where they deal with this issue.
Randy - one of the kid's dads - gets labeled as "alcoholic" with a disease and he loses all control and blames it on his disease - getting drunk every second of the day bc he cannot help it - its a disease. pretty ridiculous stuff but it made me laugh and shed some light and a different perspective on a label that we have all come to know.
Randy - one of the kid's dads - gets labeled as "alcoholic" with a disease and he loses all control and blames it on his disease - getting drunk every second of the day bc he cannot help it - its a disease. pretty ridiculous stuff but it made me laugh and shed some light and a different perspective on a label that we have all come to know.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 116
I would assume that somebody just starting out the journey of sobriety would find it daunting to always be labelled a "recovering alcoholic", whereas people with years of sobriety wear it with pride. I think the point is it doesn't matter in the end, labels or not, peace and serenity is all.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Living in Today!
Posts: 3,945
Originally Posted by serious 
i hear people who have been sober for years (10 - 20, etc.) still refer to themselves as "recovering alcoholics"...
i am curious as to why? is that an internal reminder to keep yourself in-check?
i'm thinking that after some point -- you have recovered, why still associate yourself with the bad past? (seems like a label puts a damper on progress of your life).
a better "label" would be that one is simply a healthy person, who chooses a sober lifestyle.
p.s. "Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right."
i am curious as to why? is that an internal reminder to keep yourself in-check?
i'm thinking that after some point -- you have recovered, why still associate yourself with the bad past? (seems like a label puts a damper on progress of your life).
a better "label" would be that one is simply a healthy person, who chooses a sober lifestyle.
p.s. "Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right."
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
When I speak to normal people about my alcoholism I usually call myself a sober alcoholic. I don't think they'd get it if I said recovering or recovered.
I remember as a child telling people that my dad was an alcoholic. They would get this look on their face .... they felt so sorry for me. What they didn't understand was that he was sober and had been since before I was born. Hell, for a long time, I think I thought alcoholics didn't drink .... they just used to. My mother squashed that for me.
That's the experience that leads me today to call myself a sober alcoholic. I really don't want to see that look of pity in people's faces.
In my own head, at this point in my sobriety, I consider myself recovering because I still have lots of work to do. I don't want to stop growing or attempting to grow. That just how I look at it.
It doesn't bother me either way what people call themselves. Doesn't really make a difference in my life these days. I do know it can seem confusing though.
I remember as a child telling people that my dad was an alcoholic. They would get this look on their face .... they felt so sorry for me. What they didn't understand was that he was sober and had been since before I was born. Hell, for a long time, I think I thought alcoholics didn't drink .... they just used to.
My mother squashed that for me.That's the experience that leads me today to call myself a sober alcoholic. I really don't want to see that look of pity in people's faces.
In my own head, at this point in my sobriety, I consider myself recovering because I still have lots of work to do. I don't want to stop growing or attempting to grow. That just how I look at it.
It doesn't bother me either way what people call themselves. Doesn't really make a difference in my life these days. I do know it can seem confusing though.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,954
I'm free from active addiction...I call that...free from active addiction.
So I'm recovered from recovery...thank goodness.
So I'm recovered from recovery...thank goodness.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
Originally Posted by onlythetruth
I don't refer to myself as an alcoholic at all, recovering, recovered, or otherwise.
I haven't had a drink since the Clinton administration. Alcohol does not define who I am.
I haven't had a drink since the Clinton administration. Alcohol does not define who I am.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: the high desert
Posts: 887
This is somewhat of an ongoing debate. . .i am a recovered alcoholic. I work on sobriety every day to stay that way, but i am no longer recovering. That is the way i look at it, others differ.
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