willdequit

I stayed sober for a weeks here and there and a month this spring and another in the middle of summer however, I also did drink too much some times and did it for a few weeks at a time, and lately it's been for a month of drinking beers every night. Currently I plan to stop starting today, again. What a long struggle. I need to go to meetings or something maybe. I'm not sure how good they work. When I was sober I ran a lot and worked out, it seems to be the only thing that keeps me from drinking. I got third place in a race this summer after staying sober for two months and running everyday. Currently, I have a hurt rib and head, because I was drinking with some friends and we closed down a bar, I was waiting for a taxi behind the bar when three people came up to me and beat me up and took my money. I want to drink to kill the pain but know it was part of the reason it happened. I was seeing a man for three years and he was transferred to Kansas. We were in a long distance relationship and after I got mugged and told him about it last week, he got cold and distant to me when I told him, he even said that I put myself in that situation and kept saying things to make me feel bad about it. He said I reminded him of his older brother, who is a crack addict and have robbed family and friends and lives in Boston. I never robbed anyone and never used those hard drugs. I got mad and said mean things back and deleted him from facebook and we are now not communicating at all. He's too far away anyway and when we were together he would often say mean things to me and call me names also. If I said it made me feel bad he would say I'm too sensitive. I drank more to deal with him at times it seemed. Also he lived at my house but wouldn't left a finger to help clean up after himself. Anyway, this is just an update on how I'm doing. Not the best, but ready to give a good try this time to changing my life for the better and feeling opportunistic I can do it.

FitNonDrinker

[QUOTE=willdequit;3097961]Thanks, I feel good today, early and not hung over. Still a little lathargic however. I need to start trying to eat good too I guess. My plan is counseling, I'm going to see someone today in fact. So I think the plan is to start eating better, working out, go to a counselor and stay away from alcohol, and also get the shot to curb cravings. I also plan to go on this site just to write about what I'm up to and see what other people are doing to stay sober. The reason I want to be on this site is because I feel like I need to hear other people's stories and have support, however, I don't want to post on my facebook or something like that, because I don't want all my friends, aquantances and family to know all this negative stuff about me. So thanks for the support my annonymous friends, lol.[/QUOTE

I'm sorry he's not understanding you. Take some time for yourself. Get back to the gym. Go in the evening so you can get home and go to bed. Drink lots of water while you are there. Take it day by day. Wake up tomorrow with a clean head and go from there.

willdequit

Thanks, that is what I need to do. I always feel better after the gym. However my rib is kind of hurt right now, so I need to wait a few more days for it to heal. I'll concentrate on waking up tomorrow with a clean head at least.

Dee74

I think it all boils down to making real lasting changes willdequit.

I had to ask myself what I was prepared to change? How far was I prepared to go?
How badly did want a different way of life?

D

willdequit

I got a good night sleep and stayed sober another day. Hope I do it tonight again. I did think about it a lot and felt like I didn't know what to do with myself. I also just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and a part of me was thinking maybe I should just drink to kill the pain. It's part of the reason I was in that relationship and broke up in the first place, so I need to just keep focused on staying sober, let time heal the pain.

KAD

Glad to see you here. I'm back after almost a year myself. This is day 10. Your story sounds very similar to mine in regard to alcohol ruining relationships. I am also divorced. That relationship/marriage happened because of drinking in the first place. We were both drinking, but then she quit and I didn't. Got caught numerous times but then just got better at hiding it. Just lost another relationship of 3 years about a month ago. That was definitely because of the drinking. She caught me one time too many.

Enough about me. You sound like you are serious about getting a handle on this for good. So am I. I've been told by several counselors that when you are in recovery mode you need at least a year on your own just to learn how to live with yourself and do this for yourself. It is, after all, all yours. Maybe we can help each other out. Keep at it!

awuh1

Hi Willdequit, you started this thread over a year ago, so you have been struggling with this for some time. It strikes me that your “plan” for stopping continues to involve diet and exercise. These may help a great deal, but I believe it’s going to take more than that. I suggest that you do something that has worked for others. I found that going to AA and listening to how others were able to quit was the beginning of the end of my drinking. I did everything I could to stop before going there but nothing else worked. Life, for the most part, has been good to me since. Best wishes.