Why don't people take sobriety seriously?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
Originally Posted by stugotz 
What other people think of me is none of my business.
Oh one more thing, people dont have to take sobriety seriously. I have to....
Oh one more thing, people dont have to take sobriety seriously. I have to....
↑↑↑ What he said ↑↑↑
How and why you quit is no one's business but your own, and possibly those you care about and trust.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
Because non-alcoholics could not possibly understand as they drink normally which means that they never have to control intake or frequency...family and friends have heard that we are going to stop drinking 100's of times before so can't really them from not taking us too seriously for a good long while...
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5
Why don't people take sobriety seriously
Hi this is my first time on this site. I chose dedicated as my log in name as it is the way I feel about my recovery. I strongly feel that it is not taken seriously because of stigma and lack of education. It is up to us to change this view, I am 3 years in recovery and from day 1 I have always been debs I am an alcoholic with a life threatening illness for which I will not recover but I am in remission , I am willing to talk about this to anyone who asks. I am a 47 ur old woman with a privileged lifestyle but there is no difference between me and the man on the street. Please talk about your illness only us in recovery can make a difference.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
I think people need to mind their own business and let people live how they see fit, provided they are willing to live with the consequences of doing so and are not harming society. If someone is actually forward enough to ask me "why" I don't drink if I have to tell them that I don't, I tell them it is wrong for me to drink.
Drinkers are terrified of the possibility of anyone suggesting that it may wrong for them to drink, so they will instinctively recoil from the slightest hint of moral judgement as if from a hot flame. I can guarantee you that they never ask me twice.
Sometimes people may ask if I am "in recovery," in which case I tell them "No, I am not in recovery. I never drink."
Drinkers are terrified of the possibility of anyone suggesting that it may wrong for them to drink, so they will instinctively recoil from the slightest hint of moral judgement as if from a hot flame. I can guarantee you that they never ask me twice.
Sometimes people may ask if I am "in recovery," in which case I tell them "No, I am not in recovery. I never drink."
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Valencia CA
Posts: 2
Originally Posted by Symmetry
My friend asked me yesterday if I was still not drinking.
I felt annoyed and embarrassed that I had to answer that. And when people ask if they can buy me a drink I just say no thanks and then I get the weirdest looks which then makes me feel like I have to explain myself.
Just venting
thanks!
I felt annoyed and embarrassed that I had to answer that. And when people ask if they can buy me a drink I just say no thanks and then I get the weirdest looks which then makes me feel like I have to explain myself.
Just venting
thanks!Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Santa Rosa Beach, FL
Posts: 32
During my first week, a friend asked me about not drinking. I told him I was giving my liver a break. I read that response on here. It worked. He didn't ask any further.
Last week his wife asked me why I wasn't having a drink with dinner. I told her I was going to be the designated driver, which I was, and that I hadn't had a drink in the last three weeks.
They were both very surprised. They hadn't noticed really. When they speculated why - are you trying to lose weight?, are you having health problems? - I just shrugged and said I felt like not drinking. That was the end of it. The rest of the evening went as usual.
Last week his wife asked me why I wasn't having a drink with dinner. I told her I was going to be the designated driver, which I was, and that I hadn't had a drink in the last three weeks.
They were both very surprised. They hadn't noticed really. When they speculated why - are you trying to lose weight?, are you having health problems? - I just shrugged and said I felt like not drinking. That was the end of it. The rest of the evening went as usual.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 223
I say similar things to people that don't understand the whole sobriety thing. I'm driving, giving my body a break from all toxins, gotta wake up early and don't want to have a hangover. Things like that. Most people respect that I don't want to drink, and like others have said, most don't even notice. I have a good friend that has always been one of my binge drinking buddies. I recently told her that I've been sober the last couple months. I figured she was just going to call me weak and tell me I need a drink. Instead she was happy for me and told me she probably needed to f
do the same thing.
do the same thing.
The New Me starting 1/11/09
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: California
Posts: 678
Congrats on 45 days.
It gets easier with time. Most normy's will ask once and, after I tell them I don't drink, they never ask again.
If someone is pushy, it says more about them than me.
It gets easier with time. Most normy's will ask once and, after I tell them I don't drink, they never ask again.
If someone is pushy, it says more about them than me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: in this vessel
Posts: 304
Originally Posted by Dedicated
Hi this is my first time on this site. I chose dedicated as my log in name as it is the way I feel about my recovery. I strongly feel that it is not taken seriously because of stigma and lack of education. It is up to us to change this view, I am 3 years in recovery and from day 1 I have always been debs I am an alcoholic with a life threatening illness for which I will not recover but I am in remission , I am willing to talk about this to anyone who asks. I am a 47 ur old woman with a privileged lifestyle but there is no difference between me and the man on the street. Please talk about your illness only us in recovery can make a difference.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Posts: 645
If someone asks me if they can buy me a drink, I answer, "Sure, an ice tea with lemon (or diet coke, or decaf coffee or some other non-alcoholic beverage) would be great. Thank you." Then we move on to another topic. Most people are smart enough not to push it, and I have given a very clear message. Susan
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