WINNC

I wonder if anyone else is having these issues/thoughts.

I have been sober for 130 days and the cravings have pretty much gone away and not drinking feels normal. Everything in my life is much better.

The problem is I am starting to get irritated by all the recovery stuff I am doing one Celebrate Recovery Open Meeting per week, One CR 12 Step Meeting per week, Weekly Therapist visit and a drug test every Friday (a counselor suggested this as a way of gaining my wife's trust back). Between work and family stuff I have almost no time to do much else. At some point in sobriety has anyone been successful cutting back on some of the recovery stuff. Long term one meeting per week is very manageable but I feel like I have less time now than when I was still drinking.

I would welcome anyones comments- thanks!

Pojman

Your right. Things do get easier.. For some people.. Others, that simply is not the case. Some people have to attend support groups daily for the rest of their lives to keep sober. Only the individual can truly answer this question for themselves.

A true alcoholic, or drug addict, will honestly say that the lure of drugs will never go away no matter how much time has lapsed since their last use. Although the thoughts and cravings might go away, we know that deep down inside we are always standing in front of a thin line of sobriety and life consuming addiction. There really is not much "middle ground" for an addict/alcoholic.

I am currently on the sober side of that thin line, and for me there has been a considerable amount of time that has lapsed since my last use of alcohol. I have also distanced myself a little bit from the AA program, counseling, etc. BUT!! I know with clarity that I am only a heartbeat away from being completly consumed by my addiction once again.

My advice to you would be this. "Know thyself". You need to know when you are starting your pattern of addiction once again. Signs of your addiction returning will be evident several days/weeks before you begin to cross that line.

For me - I know that once I say to myself "just one more time" I know that my pattern is starting again. This is the point where I will seek help.

In summary - Know how and when your cycle of addiction will begin, and seek immediate and focused help when this happens. Removing yourself from the AA program will not be beneficial, but it does not mean that you are self-destructing either.

Be honest with yourself. Have a clear and honest conversation with yourself about the reasons why you are distancing yourself from AA, and guage the honesty of your intentions.

Good luck!! Stay sober!!

Dee74

Hi WINNC

Maybe you need to look at exactly why you're doing what you're doing?

Only you can know what your motivation is - is it for you or is it for others?
and only you can know if what you're doing is really doing you good.

I encourage you to look at everything honestly

For me, I don't go to meetings but like to look at my recovery as an investment - I really like the life I have now, I like the man I am - and I know that I have to work on my recovery daily to keep all that....somedays thats a little, somedays a lot - it's not a chore, it's part of being who I want and need to be.

D

MycoolFitz

First all congrats on the 130 days, decrease in feelings of craving and increase in feelings of normalness. In terms of recovery stuff I guess it partly depends on how you view recovery. For me I include SR, my diet and daily exercise, meditation and reading so a lot of my recovery stuff are things I do for my overall well-being and are things I enjoy or at least really respect the need for and benifits of. That being said, I take my recovery temperature often and am willing, ready and able to adjust my plan as my progress dictates. Bottom line, recovery is number one in my life and the fact that I concider most of what I do as my time. I guess I feel very fortunate. I hope you arrive at the balance you need. all my best.

LoftyIdeals

WINNC...I have struggled with that notion for 28 yrs. This time (27 days) for me feels different. I had an epiphany this week. It finally occurred to me why I go to AA meetings and see people with 10, 20, 30, and 40+ yrs of sobriety still going to meetings. I believe its for a few basic reasons; first, those folks continue their growth in sobriety by helping others. I now hope to be one of those folks someday. But, I think the main reason is for fellowship with other recovering alcoholics. Only about 29% of the population doesn't drink (in the US). That's a significant minority. Of those, I have to wonder how many made a choice without being alcoholics. My guess is most. I think that recovering alcoholics are a minority of the minority. I could be wrong.

Even if you have good supportive people around you, how many of them have struggled with addiction? It really helps me to be able to relate to folks who understand the struggle.

With all that said, what a gift we have in SR. It's as near as your nearest internet connection. These posts are a lifesaver to me on a daily basis.

Thanks for your post. I was talking to my therapist about just this today. It was good then to articulate my thoughts, and it's good to write them now.

Glad you are doing well in recovery! I aspire for the same! I have heard of Celebrate Recovery in passing. That's a Christ-based movement, right?

sugarbear1

You spend time twice a week with Celebrate Recovery (not sure what that is unless it's aa with a religious emphasis) and 1 time a week in therapy. What's that, 3 hours? How much time did you spend drinking? 3 hours? Just getting you to think, don't want an answer. I believe quality of what I do is more than quantity. In fact, I am reducing my quantity of aa meetings yet I'll keep my quality meetings...from 14+ meetings to about 4 per week, maybe 3, meet with sponsor 1 time and, well quality, not quantity. Seriously consider what progress you've made. I'm accountable to me & sponsor- sponsor sees what I can't. Our disease can make us believe one thing while setting us up for relapse. Relapse is not part of recovery, it's untreated alcoholism!

WINNC

Thanks for everyones comments CR is a Christ Based program that does include a lot of the 12 step stuff from AA.

sugarbear1

Thanks! Enjoy sobriety and family time! Life is a balancing act! Stick with step work and be there for a newcomer. Working on ourselves and working with others keeps us sober!

eJoshua

Hi WINNC --

I'm in CR too. I do a weekly big meeting and have a weekly group I meet with that's working the steps.

I've been sober about as long as you have too, and I'm also seeing a therapist weekly. Strange -- if it weren't for the drug test and wife thing I would begin to wonder if I had another personality that was posting under a different name. Spooky!

Anyways, I'm not sure what to tell you about things getting boring or feeling like too much. My life is pretty simple right now, and aside from work and recovery I don't have much of anything going on -- no wife, no kids, not too many friends. The program I've (and you've) been working has been going well for me and I don't feel like it's too much. If I was going to cut down I would stop going on my big CR group but just keep going to my step group.

I guess give it a shot but keep a finger on your pulse, so to speak, and if you feel things going the wrong direction get back to what you're doing now.

Keep in touch, it's nice to meet someone else doing CR -- there aren't too many of us on here that I'm aware of.

LaFemme

I think this is a question we need to answer individually.

I don't do any support in real life, just SR. When I first got sober I was here constantly. At about 10 months I started cutting back a lot and now I am greatly reduced. If I had a family I would be on here even less so. But if I ever felt myself considering drink again I would ramp up. I do get counseling but it's a general, let's get my life straightened out thing.

Congrats on 130 days!

Veritas1

My first thought was...

Are you helping anyone that is struggling right now with a drinking problem?

Helping newly sober people is what I suggest.

Look for the newcomers where you go, and offer to listen, talk, help in any way you can.

gravity

I'm sure it's different for others but when I found my life getting busy, my AA sponsor said "well that's the whole point of recovery, to live life!" I don't spend as much time as I used to with "recovery stuff" but I do spend all of my time living a good, clean sober life!

JimE

Congrats on 130 days! I was very involved in AA for the first 5 to 7 years sober. I tried to hit my morning meeting 5 to 7 days a week and a few evenings meetings as well. My first sponsor told me early on not to make AA my whole life, to use the tools I learned there to live a good life outside those rooms.

Recovery today is being responsible, paying bills on time, paying my property taxes and abiding by the home owners associations rules and keeping my place in good condition. Life while drinking was the exact opposite for me. Recovery is also trying to help others and keeping a watchful eye for selfishness on my part. Recovery has been a gift, one at times I didn't even think I was worthy of. Recovery is knowing there is a God and I ain't it!