Tangledweb

Hi, glad to have found this site I am hoping to get some good advice and its seems full of supportive people.

I am a mum who has had an alcohol issue since being a teenager, the drinking has increased steadily over the years and I have often been out of control. The past six months have seen a serious increase and instead of drinking one or two bottles of wine a day/night I am managing half a bottle of vodka and say four cans of lager which is just ludicrous. I start drinking at midday and suffer some withdrawl symptoms such as night sweats and anxiety and that is without stopping drinking. After yet another drunken two day binge I know I need to stop. I want to detox but am a bit scared so setting a two week cutting down before I stop totally.

I am reluctant to seek dr help as last time they just passed me on to alchohol team and took details of my kids etc. Would like to hear from anyone that has managed recovery on their own. Thanks for taking the time to read.

sugarbear1

I support you and your decision to stop! You can do it!

LouLa

Hi Tangled! I'm new to this site as well. Our situations sound very similar. I have thought about doing the same thing you suggested...just cutting back and gradually eliminating alcohol altogether. What I find, though, is that I can't stop at one glass of wine. Or two. Once I start, it's drink till I go to sleep. Today is a brand new day. You can do it! We're all in this together.

Tangledweb

Thanks for posting.

I cannot remember the last time I had one drink it is just not something that I am capable of doing. So I going to cut it down gradually and then stop totally for me it seems the only option. I have cut down several times before and managed quitting for three months but I always start again and each time when I start drinking its worse and I need more. I can quite easily drink 12 cans of lager in a day evening and past boyfriends would have been unconscious. Not good for a woman of small frame I worry about what I am doing to my body and realise that I am slowly killing myself. I want to stay around for my kids so I really need to do this. That is not even taking into account how dreadful I behave towards people even those who care about me.

Thanks for the support and Loula it would be good to have a stop drinking buddy. I think its really important for me to not stop immediately as I feel I am drinking enough to give myself medical issues. Must play is safe

MycoolFitz

Welcome to SR, glad you joined us. I guess I do recovery on my own but not really because I am not an island. I utilize SR and meaningful things and support I get from others, and readings and healthful behaviors. I also utilize the health care system as needed because addiction is about dis-ease and wellness. Sorry you had a bad experience with your doctors. I guess recovery "on my own" is a relative term. Depending on the situation I will do whatever is necessary to maintain my sobriety.

LouLa

I feel the same. I think my body would go into total shock if I just went cold turkey, since the amount I have been drinking lately is quite a lot. We can start today! I want my guilt and anxiety gone immediately!

Tangledweb

I think its called tapering but today I have set myself a four can of lager limit which is way below my normal consumption although on a good day I can manage with four. Today will be the start of a new life for us. Set yourself a limit that you know your body can cope with and lets not falter and give in. One day at a time and keep posting I know I am going to get very down but its better than the guilt.

Tangledweb

Thanks mycoolfitz. I cannot afford to be scrutinised for my drinking as I have two young children and by the same token I cannot afford to carrying on drinking. I have some very precious gifts in my children and I hope they will keep me doing this

iliveforyou

Tangledweb - Hi and welcome to SR Glad you are here with us.

A couple of years ago, I stopped drinking on my own. However, my addiction then manifested into another one - pain pills. Opiates being my DOC (ex heroin addict). I have also stopped on my own with several relapses. But I do have a therapist and a psych dr. I see a couple of times a month but it's they don't address my addictions. I've tried AA/NA MANY times and have decided it's not for me.

Our children are true blessings and my daughter has helped guide me thru this mess. I deserve to be clean and my daughter deserves a mother not under the influence of anything.

Alcohol detox can be dangerous but I do understand your reservations.

You CAN DO THIS!!!! However you choose to go about it - I am rooting for you

-Jess

Tangledweb

thanks for the support Jess and yes I deserve to be sober and not a wreck. Alchohol acts as a mask for issues at the start but it is not helping and is just making things worse. I am in a good relationship and in danger of destroying that and affecting my kids adversely. One day at a time, one step at a time. About twenty years ago I gave up drugs and managed to do that one day at a time and have never relapsed I can do this

nandm

Welcome to SR

Dee74

Hi tangledweb

I hope your plan works, but tapering never worked for me - if you find you're still having trouble, I hope you'll consider other avenues...

I'm not a UK resident but unless you're an actual danger to the welfare of your children I think the risk of social services becoming involved if you seek help is minimal.

There are recovery groups available like AA or SMART too, as other options for support.

D

Zebra1275

Welcome to SR!

saphira

Hi and welcome!! I'm kind of with Dee on this one. I really hope the tapering works, but for me it was never an option. The whole problem with me was that I COULDN'T stop drinking once I started. But I think it's a good place to start and hopefully you'll find success! I think the important thing is just to be determined and even if tapering doesn't work, DON'T GIVE UP... keep trying different things until you're able to quit completely. Best of luck!!

Tangledweb

Thanks for the welcomes and supportive comments. Well yesterday went ok three beers and I slept, the night before I had already started tapering really and had four beers so this morning I feel shaky, clammy, shoulders tensed and achey, stomach feels delicate and have no desire to eat infact the thought of food makes me feel sick at the minute. If I feel this bad just cutting down I hate to think what cold turkey must be like. Head throbs and I cannot face leaving the house. Still if I can do this for a few weeks it will put me in a place where I can stop drinking totally. Do I feel like getting a bottle of vodka? No way. Yes, it would make me feel better but then I will be back to an emotional mess. I am not an emotional mess the alcohol convinces me I am.

SSIL75

After my worst bender I tapered down (didn't stay sober though) and when I finally quit I tapered a little. So I have a 50% 'success' rate with that approach When I quit though I was DONE. It was just a relief to know that I would never drink again. Never moderate, ever. I knew that if I ever even had thoughts of moderation it would be the alcohol talking.

I used Rational Recovery's AVRT to get through the early cravings. I also use this site a LOT. So, no local resources/authorities.

I would say do whatever you need to do to quit drinking. It really is life and death.

Tangledweb

I am interested in the AVRT and know that I will be on here alot so be patient with me. I will not put my kids at risk by seeking help but then I cannot put my kids at risk by carrying on being an alcoholic who is slowly killing themselves either. I have quit before and been through detox although both times accidently, second time was pretty scary with delusions but everyone thought I had flu!!!! If I can manage two weeks at tapering I will be able to quit again then its just a case of working at staying off. Not easy but next time will be even worse. Thanks

Tangledweb

Today is third day of tapering and feel today is going to be hardest so far. Once I get past a week I will start feeling better I really hope. Having a bit of a mad house clean to keep myself busy.

Tangledweb

Yesterday was not a great day I finished on 6 cans but woke up feeling really great!!! Started my first can at 1.30pm which is a late start for me and think I will manage to stick to four but starting to feel a bit of a shake and hot sweat come on and anxiety getting bad. I am at the stage I just do not want to carry on drinking but am too scared to just stop. Its ridiculous that I detest drinking now but am scared my body is going to keel over if I do not. How do we end up like this? I so need to sort this out and this week is torture.

Tangledweb

Feeling so low and depressed. It has not helped I thought my ex would take the kids next week and then I could get a friend round and really go for it so by the time they got back I would be through the worse but no as per usual he is too busy