Songtx

Ok. So, minor slip up tonight at 2 week mark. I drank 2 beers. The first sip was actually pretty gross to me. But I just ended up drinking the 2. I ended getting into a foul mood. I was having these beers with my husband out of habit (we've been drinking buddies for years). I caught a buzz and we were out of beer. There was a bottle of wine from our landlord, and it supposedly was really quality. My husband poured me a glass, cause I said "screw it, I'm already buzzed". I took a sip and it tasted like poison, I also realized I wasn't quite enjoying how I was feeling. I poured it back into the bottle. I also missed my evening walk, which I started when I stopped drinking.
I don't feel like I failed or anything. I'm just wondering why the reactions? Why it tasted baf, why I didn't like brilleing buzzed. Is this all psychological?

Dee74

I know I reached a point where drinking simply wasn't fun anymore - I knew it would kill me if I didn't stop...thats a pretty good buzzkill.

As for taste - everytime I went back to drinking, it tasted awful.
I suspect that's because it tasted awful

D

instant

In that situation I would focus on what I was trying to achieve. In discussions with my partner we have agreed she does not offer me wine if she is having any.

Songtx

Right Dee, it just isn't fun anymore, that's for sure. I am also worried about it affecting my health.


Instant, I know my husband is having a hard time w/ my not drinking. I think he was just glad I was for one night. Still trying to think of what I was trying to achieve.

ajangel

Please be careful songtx. I was 60 days, had a beer (don't like beer), relapsed for a month. It was the slight buzz that made me relapse. If you really want to quit drinking, don't let your alcoholic brain talk you into having just one. Good luck

Phillyphan8811

My real issue is, I love the tase of beer. So much that if microbrews made nonalcoholic beer that would not trigger a relapse, i'd drink it.

Threshold

currently, due to the horrible feelings (physical and otherwise) associated with my recent relapse/overdose, the smell of bourbon and the feel of a buzz are making me ill. It's like when you eat a certain food and then get really sick, and it takes your taste away.

I'm not sure if this will last or for how long.

I took a couple benydryl for a cold, got that slight "woozy" feeling and went into a panic. I am currently glad about this. Really reduces the temptation to use.

Fenris

I'm not sure what it is, but I know that when I slipped, the alcohol definitely didn't taste or feel as good as I remembered it, and I woke up with a blistering hangover (which almost never happened in the past, no matter how much I drank). Something biological/chemical, perhaps? I know there's a psychological component to it ("a headful of recovery and a belly full of beer don't mix"), but the physical part of it was good motivation to not attempt any more "research".

--Fenris.

sugarbear1

Fenris, I believe you felt like that because your tolerance changed and your nerves weren't as numb as they used to be.

This disease wants me dead. To drink like I did may put me in a coma or kill me! I'd drink like I used to and my body won't handle it. If I smoked crack like I did, death would win.

artsoul

I think it's like when you break up any toxic relationship: after a while, you forget the bad stuff and start thinking about the good times. When you go back, you realize it really wasn't all that great.

Coming here every day helps remind me how much I want to stay sober. For me, it's not about whether two beers would hurt me - it's about leaving the door open to my addiction and what that means for my future.

I'm really sorry your husband isn't more supportive - that has to be hard.

JoeCree

I know it is a touchy subject on here - but I have found during the summer with friends and BBQs, that I have enjoyed 0.0% Becks German Beer. To me somehow it tastes just like beer (used too), and you don't get any buzz whatsoever, it is just like drinking a soda - but does have a refreshing taste and nicer to "mingle" with people.

Some of my friends tried it and thought it tasted like water - but hey at 9+ months alcohol free now, it tastes like beer to me.. lol

newwings

I know it's a touchy subject, too, but I have also enjoyed 0% n/a beer on several occasions. It's definitely not something that everyone can do without relapse, but I've been okay with it and it hasn't ever given me thoughts of drinking. I wasn't ever a beer drinker, just wine - but not because I didn't like beer - it just wouldn't have hit the spot quick enough for me. Too me it tastes quite nice and I don't fear it triggering me. If it ever did, it would be straight down the sink.

Nirvana1

I'm glad you realized what you were doing and stopped at 2 beers and a sip of wine. You made it 2 weeks and that is great. Most people have false starts when they decide to quit drinking. Get back on the saddle and do something different this time so that you don't fall back into the drinking patterns like the one you had.

What you also need to hear is that many people just have "2 drinks" and then stop, but then find excuses just like you had when you said, "screw it, I'm already buzzed", and get right back to their old drinking ways. Once you're back in drinking mode, your mind will give you reasoning and justification to keep drinking, drink more, etc.

Don't be discouraged in that you are just experiencing what all of us have had to, but just aren't ready enough to not have a drink no matter what yet.