SindyLuhu

A counselor once told me, "You do you. I'll do me."

I'm in a similar situation in that my husband still drinks. He's supportive of my efforts, but there's a part of me that wonders if our relationship will change in a negative way because of this. I get nervous about that, but then I repeat, "I do me. He does him." Something as fragile as maintaining sobriety--and sanity--is the best gift you can give yourself.

:day6

1_day@_a_time

when people say negative things, or "attack" us, it has nothing to do w us. It rests solely on them & their struggles.

b true 2 u

Threshold

This is a difficult hurdle for many in recovery. It does effect our relationships, and not everyone will understand or be supportive. The thing we have to decide in recovery is why are we doing it? The only reason that will stand the test of time is that we are doing it to save our own lives. If we do it to save a relationship...what happens if the relationship falters? If we do it for our kids, what happens when the kids grow up and move away? you see what I mean?

My hubby wanted me to stop using, but not to say I was an addict or spend a lot of time and energy on recovery...I thought getting clean would help the marriage. I thought staying clean...would help the marriage. Guess what? I'm not married anymore but I am clean! because the only relationship that I know I will have for the rest of my life is the one I have with myself. If I get clean for any other person or any other reason...

I relapsed when the pain of losing my marriage, family, home, etc hit me...but guess what? it didn't help me feel better, didn't bring any of that stuff back. So, I got clean and said "do YOU want to live in active addiction?" and the answer was no. so...this time it's for me. And I appreciate the H*LL out of me being clean!