Why does it always seem like...
 

There's a reason to put-off recovery?

I'm having a party tomorrow. Right now I can't stop thinking that I should wait to quit until after the party. That's the thing. There's always SOMETHING going on - some reason to drink. I always say - I'll quit after _____________ or let me just wait until the holidays or it's a special occasion, I can have just one (yeah, right). I wish I could control myself and just keep it to one or two, but I know I can't. So I'm still sticking to it because even though it always seems like there's a reason to drink there are a million more reasons to abstain.

Because you're in the habit of drinking all the time. I was the same way.

Once you break the habit though, you start to wonder why you ever felt like you needed to drink during all of those occasions.

I think if people wait until they're "ready" to quit or when the time is "right" they may never quit at all because the time is never right. Starting sobriety is rarely convenient, often uncomfortable, usually frightening and may just seem overall sucky--but its always necessary and the time to do it is always now if you're an alcoholic. Take a leap of that cliff and you'll find its never as deep or deadly as your fears.

Oh, yeah, I remember using the party excuse a few times. The first was about three years ago, then again a couple times in 2009, then again... oh, you get the idea. It's amazing how easily "next week" or "next month" can stretch out for years.

I tried to avoid parties, bars, etc. for the first several weeks. My social life took a hit for a while, but I had to make sobriety my No. 1 priority every minute of every day. So glad I did. Everything is better now—weekends, weekdays, parties, concerts, you name it.

So many times I wanted to quit. There was always a reason to drink. I said to my husband that I wanted to quit so many times, everyday I woke up feeling like crap, ignored and neglected my kids, self hate, anxiety, embarrassing memories. None of this was enough. 10 days ago, I woke up and knew I was damn serious this time. It was a serious desire to take my life back so that I could love myself, be a good wife and mother. So that others can depend on me. I want to live. The first five days were bad for me. I'm not gonna lie. But SR has been a consistent staple in my sober diet. When I get an urge, I come here. I'm ranting. I totally understand how you feel. I just hope you find out what it feels like to wake up without having been drinking and that our children will continue to receive the benefits of having sober mothers.

Truth for me is that it's such a relief to not worry about getting drunk at the upcoming party. So many times I made a fool of myself, drove home, woke up the next day not remembering a thing.

I'm scared of how bad I got and even more scared about what was next if I kept going.
As MyCoolFitz said - there isn't a right time - the hope is that we stop before we have a really really wrong time.

Sobriety for me is a way of life, not an activity. My desire to live addiction free and recover is stronger than my desire to get plastered and is unaffected by outside influences. It was not always that way.

It is a great joy to go to a party, see others drink, and not feel that I am denying myself of anything.

It really is a relief. If I don't drink I won't have drunk behavior. I'll wake up without guilt and regret.

Amanda--make it through this party without drinking at all and see how good you feel---if you have quit in the past when there wasn't anything going on, this will be a new experience. Nothing like making it through those events in early sobriety to really give you a taste of the good life. Consider it an experiment if that gets you through it--it can be an exhilirating feeling the next morning. (forgive me if you have done this in the past and you already know!! If that's the case, do it again! ;-)

Because you're an alcoholic. And as long as the alcoholic is allowed to call the shots, you'll never choose to quit!