bayliss

I hear what everything is saying and of course, agree with Carl...it is pretty amazing to forget all the crappy things that have happened while drinking. I guess once things start getting back to normal and things are going good you can easily forget all the screw up and arguments that were led by alcohol.
I have never actually been diagnosed as an alcoholic. I just believe that I am. Especially when I feel the "need" to drink to get away from my daily stresses and problems. I need to find healthier alternatives in dealing with stress.
And I guess alcohol seemed to be there and that time and I fell into a routine...
I also believe that if you begin to hide it from the people you love...then yea, you have an issue. It's funny how one minute you feel somewhat empowered and think you can beat this and everything and then the next day you feel ashamed because the voice in your head is telling you that "you are different" that "you can have a drink or two tonight"...when it reality...that isn't the case @ all...

topspin

My first time in recovery lasted 7 years.

No slips, relapses, etc. ;
Then got a little too smart, and gave "normal " drinking as good a try as my hard-headed self could.

Would stop for a year (twice) , sometimes a week, or two, but eventually ended up a 7 day/ week blackout drinker again.

The whole 13 years was one long and painful relapse, since I never FULLY intended to quit permanently., when I would .

I wonder how many of us here have an unusually high threshhold to drag out self inflicted pain ?

In the rearview mirror, it sure seems like I was a sort of masochist, really.


....on the flip side, lasting gratitude ( for sobriety ) comes easy. early

Thankfully !?!

EmeraldRose

For me, a relapse would be a weakening of strength, not thinking things through and not paying attention to my inner thoughts, actions and what my inner power and gut is trying to relay to me. Once I ignore my positive thinking I know that the past 30 years could return in a heartbeat and right where I left off. The action to this thinking would be the drinking but the relapse itself is falling off the program. The drinking is the consequence and I don't want to go there again. It'll be 6 months on the 28th.

CarolD

If I delibertly drank or ate food with alcohol...I would be compelled to re start my sobriety...

Why?
I work my program based on being honest with myself and others.

I rearely use the terms relapse or slip...and never in relation to my successful recovery.
.
And no one diagnosed me as an alcoholic either...I knew I was years before I actually stopped.
Eventually my doctor did diagnose me with situational depression caused by alcohol.told me to abstain and go to AA....
I'm so grateful he did.

Symmetry

absolutely