Dating and Recovery
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
Honesty is essential to my recovery.
That said, I didn't tell people when I stopped drinking as I felt it was a very personal decision. I became a vegetarian about ten years ago, and I didn't tell people about that either. It was about me, not them.
That said, I didn't tell people when I stopped drinking as I felt it was a very personal decision. I became a vegetarian about ten years ago, and I didn't tell people about that either. It was about me, not them.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Boston
Posts: 11
Thanks for this thread. I was thinking about this recently. I had my first date last night when this came up (3 weeks sober, about your age OP). I knew we'd hit a bar after the movie, so I puzzled over how I might explain my choice of bubbly water over the "normal" stuff. The exchange went something like:
me: I'll have some of that delicious soda water.
her: *quizzical look*
me: yeah, about that...I don't mean to freak you out but I quit drinking three weeks ago. her: oh, that's cool
me: yeah, I thought my life would be better without it because I felt like I needed to move on to a new lifestyle.
her: Oh, that's cool, smart idea.
She goes on about how she's cut back on her drinking recently as well. So, it seemed ok, but you never know, moderate, wine tasting-type drinking is important to many women of a certain ilk, and it may be a negative to some. However, I remember a conversation with another girl (who is a friend) recently. It went something like:
me: so, what happened to that guy you were dating last time I saw you?
her: Oh, I gave him the boot.
me: how come?
her: I dunno, blah, blah, he smoked and I hate cigarettes.
me: Uhm...sorry, but I'm calling bs on that one. If you liked the guy, you wouldn't have cared if he smoked.
her: Haha yeah maybe you're right because the guy I have a super crush on right now smokes like a chimney.
Moral of story: people like each other, or they just don't. Whether you drink or not isn't going to really affect that.
hp
me: I'll have some of that delicious soda water.
her: *quizzical look*
me: yeah, about that...I don't mean to freak you out but I quit drinking three weeks ago. her: oh, that's cool
me: yeah, I thought my life would be better without it because I felt like I needed to move on to a new lifestyle.
her: Oh, that's cool, smart idea.
She goes on about how she's cut back on her drinking recently as well. So, it seemed ok, but you never know, moderate, wine tasting-type drinking is important to many women of a certain ilk, and it may be a negative to some. However, I remember a conversation with another girl (who is a friend) recently. It went something like:
me: so, what happened to that guy you were dating last time I saw you?
her: Oh, I gave him the boot.
me: how come?
her: I dunno, blah, blah, he smoked and I hate cigarettes.
me: Uhm...sorry, but I'm calling bs on that one. If you liked the guy, you wouldn't have cared if he smoked.
her: Haha yeah maybe you're right because the guy I have a super crush on right now smokes like a chimney.
Moral of story: people like each other, or they just don't. Whether you drink or not isn't going to really affect that.
hp
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Happy is probably right. Here's my two cents: my boyfriend isn't a drinker (moderate drinker... might drink 1 drink in a month's time) and he's been with me pretty tight since end of February. I was drunk the first time we met... LOL, not funny... pathetic, but the point is it sure didn't stop him! I've been drinking heavily since then... and he's stood right beside me and has been nothing but an encouragement.
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