It's day 4 from my relapse
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
It's day 4 from my relapse
It's going to be day 4 of my relapse. Each day is getting better. I don't have anymore nightmares and I'm not deeply sore like before. I wish I didn't drink because that one night became 5 days. Had to call in sick from work because of this and miss a week of weight lifting. Before this I had 3 months of sobriety which was the longest I had in 3 years. What I learn about this is that I can't tell myself that after sometime I can drink again. It's something that is no longer fun well just the first night but after that is hell. I rather now to stay sober and get bored sometimes then go throw a binge episode and feel like cr*p. I always thought drinking is an alcohol thing but truly saying no to alcohol because it does not give me what I want is more being an alcohol because I'm living my life and being responsible like going to work, eating health, going to the gym and just being my true self.
Those 3 months that I've didn't drink, I was not depress or nervous and things were not perfect at the time it's the best I was and now I have to start over. Sucks but that's life and I have to take it one day at a time.
Thanks for listen aka reading my thread.
June 25, 2011 sober
Those 3 months that I've didn't drink, I was not depress or nervous and things were not perfect at the time it's the best I was and now I have to start over. Sucks but that's life and I have to take it one day at a time.
Thanks for listen aka reading my thread.
June 25, 2011 sober
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Venus, Space
Posts: 757
I think, as (ex) problem drinkers we walk in one of two directions- either away from drinking or towards picking up again.
Sound like you're ready to start walking away. Each time I quit and failed in the past it was, to me, in large part because I didn't do anything different other than saying alcohol messes up my life and I should stop - that has a lifespan of 1 day to maybe 4-5 months for me. I had to dig deeper, put a wider recovery plan into play and stay connected. For me, I'd start feeling good or my problems would get resolved and I'd slowly (or quickly) just sort of ... 'drift' away from the horrible experiences of not too long ago and suddenly that crazy idea that things would be different "this time" would occur. Alas, it has never been different in all my 25ish years of drinking.
Good luck on this attempt, I hope you find clarity and make it your last.
Sound like you're ready to start walking away. Each time I quit and failed in the past it was, to me, in large part because I didn't do anything different other than saying alcohol messes up my life and I should stop - that has a lifespan of 1 day to maybe 4-5 months for me. I had to dig deeper, put a wider recovery plan into play and stay connected. For me, I'd start feeling good or my problems would get resolved and I'd slowly (or quickly) just sort of ... 'drift' away from the horrible experiences of not too long ago and suddenly that crazy idea that things would be different "this time" would occur. Alas, it has never been different in all my 25ish years of drinking.
Good luck on this attempt, I hope you find clarity and make it your last.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Coffs Nsw
Posts: 80
congrats on day 4..and returning.. I have found over time it gets harder and harder to recover and the damage always deeper each time..proud of u... gives me hope when u say one night sober becomes 5... nicely put
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