loveurself

Today is day 4 since my husband has been off the alcohol. As I watch him load his little container with vitamin pills this morning, my heart broke for him.

For the longest time, I blamed him for not quitting because I thought he had control of it and he just didn’t' want to quit. For the first time, I saw him through different eyes today. I removed all those angry feelings I had towards him and I saw a kid who thought this was normal because that was how he was raised, I saw a man who didn't know how to ask for help because he was supposed to be in control, today, I saw my best friend trying so hard to get better because he didn’t want to lose what meant the most to him…his wife, his children and himself. If alcoholism is a disease than he is the victim. I need to help him get better and I know he will if he tries.

Latte

Help yourself too.

Dee74

Welcome loveurself
Your husband is lucky to have such a caring and supportive spouse.

Latte's right though - what are you doing to take care of you?

D

loveurself

Thanks, Dee74.

I agree. I do have to take of myself along with our 3 children.

I was at the point of signing a year lease but my heart told me not to. If you are able to help save a person's life, wouldn't you? I know the decision to want to live is ultimately up to the person. In my case, I know my husband is sincere and wants to quit drinking. He just doesn't know how. How do you let go of an addiction that you don't even know you have? Right now, my husband needs to get better not only for me and our children but for himself. I'm the one person next to himself that can help get him above water again. I couldn't just let him drown.

I went to my first Al-Anon meeting this past Monday and I plan on attending more meetings plus continue on educating myself about this disease.


If and when the time comes when it gets to the point where I have to remove myself and the kids from him, I know that I will be strong enough to detach and move forward. Our children is my will power.

Anna

It sounds like you have a good attitude and I'm glad you are taking care of yourself and your kids. Your husband is lucky to have your support.

Zebra1275

As others have said, your husband is lucky to have your support. Your support might be an additional catalyst to help him get well.

EmeraldRose

It is hard to see the addiction side. I was told to 'just fix it'. Ok....so...how? How do you change something that you've been doing for 30+ years?
Hopefully, your husband can get to where he can fully change his habits for good -for the good of everyone involved. Wishing you peace and strength. I think its' awesome you can be there for him.