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suicide attempt

Old 05-24-2011, 05:03 PM
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suicide attempt

And most notable I'm like really pissed that it didn't work, that I'm still alive. Last night, I took a bottle (30) of Ambien and also one bottle of clonidine. I have not idea why I'm still alive but again am just really annoyed that it didn't work. I woke up this morning really groggy, but like, WTF???

I don't ever see an end to the pain and loneliness I feel. This is just my problem, I don't want to trigger anybody. Most folks probaby aren't nuts in this way!!!
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:06 PM
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Please call a suicide hotline and find some help, it may seem impossible but please make the call.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:07 PM
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http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ease-read.html

Here is some information with help numbers.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:16 PM
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Please seek help above & beyond the forum.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:19 PM
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Please do read the link BikeGuy posted JennyBeth - there's hotline numbers, links to specialist forums and very useful reading.

I've no idea what that amount of those drugs would do but I recommend strongly you getting checked out too at your local Dr or the ER - it's better to be safe than sorry.

D
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:20 PM
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I tried suicide too, a long time ago, and looking back I'm glad I survived. I wasn't glad then but am now. Please get help. You're worth it.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:32 PM
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Originally Posted by jennybeth View Post
And most notable I'm like really pissed that it didn't work, that I'm still alive. Last night, I took a bottle (30) of Ambien and also one bottle of clonidine. I have not idea why I'm still alive but again am just really annoyed that it didn't work. I woke up this morning really groggy, but like, WTF???

I don't ever see an end to the pain and loneliness I feel. This is just my problem, I don't want to trigger anybody. Most folks probaby aren't nuts in this way!!!
While I never tried to intentionally commit Suicide, there are many nights when I should have died from OD mixtures of Minithins , and depressants + alcohol. I mean heart stopping amounts.

Not to mention the Acid + Butane inhaling + weed nights.

I actually prayed many a night that I wake up in the morning. At times I prayed that if I should die before I wake to keep my daughter and her mother safe and to take care of them.


I can't help but feel ( and maybe it's my ego ) that perhaps God had other plans for me. That he he had plans for me that did not involve dying.

It's possible that the same may be true for you. I wish you luck in finding the peace you are looking for and like others have said , please contact someone and talk to them.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:34 PM
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I am so relieved and happy you're still with us, Jennybeth.
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Old 05-24-2011, 05:45 PM
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I'm sorry Jennybeth, please get help from your dr.
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Old 05-24-2011, 06:50 PM
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I'm glad you're still here, too, jennybeth. The pain you're feeling now is not forever. You can change things and have a whole new life. Please seek help and let us know how you're doing.
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Old 05-24-2011, 07:37 PM
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There is a reason for everything...a reason why you felt the need to do that...a reason why it didn't work and a reason why your life is worth living.
There have been many times in my past 30 years that I shouldn't have made it...almost overdosed on coke, drunk driving, driving on acid, etc etc etc....I now know that my life is too precious to waste. Everyone has a reason and a time. It's not your time. Please please seek the appropriate help. And please come back to us so we know you're ok.
Wishing you peace and strength.
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Old 05-24-2011, 09:33 PM
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Hang in there kiddo, we all hope to hear from you soon! Please check out the links from BikeGuy and take care of you!
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Old 05-24-2011, 09:45 PM
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Hi everyone, and thank you so much for your concern. It matters so much to me! I will make some phone calls as per the numbers offered here but am kind of afraid to go to the ER as I don't want to be put in a mental hospital. Thank you so much for caring.
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Old 05-24-2011, 10:06 PM
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Do make some calls Jenny. I'm glad you're ok.

D
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Old 05-25-2011, 12:19 AM
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Wink There is Hope

Jenny I don't think your nuts I have been where you are at and I am grateful my well thought-out plans didn't work!

When I start to feel hopeless I come on here, or I reach out at an AA meeting.

I know how hard it is to turn that kind of depression around that is why it is so vital to get some help from a professional.

I know in every state they have confidential hotlines you can call and they can give you names and numbers of people who will help.

You said you were going to call someone, after you do will you come back and let us know how you are and if it helped?

Please come back I'll be waiting to hear from you. Peace my sister

Last edited by newby1961; 05-25-2011 at 12:21 AM. Reason: spell check
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Old 05-25-2011, 01:35 AM
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Im glad u are still with us today JennyBeth Take it easy and try to have a relaxed day and seek help as soon as u feel able x
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Old 05-25-2011, 07:14 AM
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Originally Posted by jennybeth View Post
And most notable I'm like really pissed that it didn't work, that I'm still alive. Last night, I took a bottle (30) of Ambien and also one bottle of clonidine. I have not idea why I'm still alive but again am just really annoyed that it didn't work. I woke up this morning really groggy, but like, WTF???

I don't ever see an end to the pain and loneliness I feel. This is just my problem, I don't want to trigger anybody. Most folks probaby aren't nuts in this way!!!
Welcome, welcome, welcome, sister, know that hope exists for you.

I too, was a failure at living and wanted to die, so bad I tried it, similar method as you, a bottle of sleeping pills washed down with a bottle of Everclear. Obviously I failed at that too, as evident by the fact that I am typing this, lol.

When you can't live and you can't die what else is a person to do??? A text book that some friends gave me reads like this:

"If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort."

After several in and out trips in some fascinating institutions His grace landed me back in the fellowship of Alcoholic's Anonymous. Today, I follow specific directions from the text book that fellowship uses and my life as been on fire ever since...beyond my wildest dreams. No more being lonesome, depressed, etc...

If there is anything else I can do for you please let me know.

God could and would if he were sought.



AABB1st
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Old 05-25-2011, 07:23 AM
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Originally Posted by jennybeth View Post
And most notable I'm like really pissed that it didn't work, that I'm still alive. Last night, I took a bottle (30) of Ambien and also one bottle of clonidine. I have not idea why I'm still alive but again am just really annoyed that it didn't work. I woke up this morning really groggy, but like, WTF???

I don't ever see an end to the pain and loneliness I feel. This is just my problem, I don't want to trigger anybody. Most folks probaby aren't nuts in this way!!!
Jennybeth, oh please call one of the numbers mentioned by the posters above!

You said most folks probably aren't nuts in this way, but really, I think there are far more than you think, myself included. That's a LOT of powerful stuff you took and feeling groggy is just one symptom. I pray that you call a hotline and a hospital. Please!

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Old 05-25-2011, 08:04 AM
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Sunshine

Hello and I also am glad you are here today!!!

Please try to take everyones love and advice and know you are special eventhough it does not feel like it.

I to should of died like so many others here between all the coke,x,acid,mushrooms,valium,percs,oxyo,speical k,acholol,and really anything else you could name.

But I am glad to be here talking to you this is my first time at soberity and I am 8 days in , I have a lot of things to fix, I hope to see you around while it happpens.

Peace, Dylan
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Old 05-25-2011, 09:26 AM
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May 19th 2007 was my try at it. I dont thinkI have ever in my life felt as hopeless asI did that day. Anyone here will tell you, I am the poster child for relapse and pride preventing me from recovery. But i always try asnyway. I stopped that day.
I wontgo into the gorey details because it was pretty bad. But had I not been found for another 15 mins I would not be here. My uncle cleaned up the horror movie seen in my house. Lots of blood. I was really goin for it.
I woke up 3 days later strapped to a hospital bed but grateful I did. The only thing I remmeber about any of it, was the reaction and looks on my family's faces and especially my grams when they found me. I remember nothing else. Why do you think that is? I think to show me that it affects more than me.
Please get help. There is no comin back from that.
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