Completely out of control
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
Sorry to hear that Aysha. It's never too late to get your life back on track. Going home sounds a good idea. Learning why you drink and dealing with your problems will help you to recovery and get your life back on track. There is a lot of programs out there. Do your research on them and see which one will work for you.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
I made it home last Sunday. I had already missed one train the beginning of May because I was too busy getting high. I managed to pawn anything of value before I left. Smoked the money I got wired to get said pawned stuff. But at least I made it this time.
Now its time to get real serious about life and recovery. So I proved to myself I can make it on my own as long as I stay clean. Bceause I did for almost 2 mos. I kicked ass to be honest. I waqsnt playin around when I got down there. But I ended up in old places with old people and it just fell apart from there. Me being nosey and wanting to show off my new found freedom and independence. That back fired right in my face.
I dont even want to think about what I did to get money. I make myself sick. I hated every minute of it. But that dam drug pushed me to be ok with it. I pushed myself to be ok with it so I could get high. I had a break down toward the end there. Sick of that life style. Sick of all the gross disgusting things that go along with it. I thought I was goin to really lose my mind there at the end. I probably would be somewhere real bad right now if I didnt get out fo there when I did. It was really taking a toll on me mentally and emotionally.
I have alot fo work to do. ALOT!!
Thx everyone for being here and supporting me. I have to get it together.
Now its time to get real serious about life and recovery. So I proved to myself I can make it on my own as long as I stay clean. Bceause I did for almost 2 mos. I kicked ass to be honest. I waqsnt playin around when I got down there. But I ended up in old places with old people and it just fell apart from there. Me being nosey and wanting to show off my new found freedom and independence. That back fired right in my face.
I dont even want to think about what I did to get money. I make myself sick. I hated every minute of it. But that dam drug pushed me to be ok with it. I pushed myself to be ok with it so I could get high. I had a break down toward the end there. Sick of that life style. Sick of all the gross disgusting things that go along with it. I thought I was goin to really lose my mind there at the end. I probably would be somewhere real bad right now if I didnt get out fo there when I did. It was really taking a toll on me mentally and emotionally.
I have alot fo work to do. ALOT!!
Thx everyone for being here and supporting me. I have to get it together.
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