6
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Join Date: Apr 2011
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6
I have not posted all week. I am on day 6. I managed to stick to my guns regarding my drunken mother in law. Father in law called Wednesday and wanted us to go to dinner. I told him that we would love to, however, if my mil was smashed, we would not be going. I also told him that we no longer wanted our children around her when she is like that.
I keep trying to think of some way that we could help her, but I am at a loss. My fil is the best enabler that I have ever met. He knows that she has a problem but will buy her liquor and actually encourage her to get to where "she can handle it." my husband and I both agree that she CAN'T handle it. It is an all or nothing situation with her. My fil actually told me last night that she only had a glass of wine with her meal so he thought she was really trying. I am baffled by this statement considering the fact that she was plowed the night before. Wouldn't really trying involve stepping completely away from the bottle?
I keep trying to think of some way that we could help her, but I am at a loss. My fil is the best enabler that I have ever met. He knows that she has a problem but will buy her liquor and actually encourage her to get to where "she can handle it." my husband and I both agree that she CAN'T handle it. It is an all or nothing situation with her. My fil actually told me last night that she only had a glass of wine with her meal so he thought she was really trying. I am baffled by this statement considering the fact that she was plowed the night before. Wouldn't really trying involve stepping completely away from the bottle?
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Portland
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I think that the answer here is that you need to worry about yourself. On the other hand, the ache of turning your back on a family member is not to be taken lightly.
What if you took her to lunch and if she drinks, sy you'll take her home and do it. Then leave. I imagine that she will see thatyou aren't going to participate. Are you sure your dad is telling her what is really going on?
What if you took her to lunch and if she drinks, sy you'll take her home and do it. Then leave. I imagine that she will see thatyou aren't going to participate. Are you sure your dad is telling her what is really going on?
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Portland
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I, I didn't mean to indicate that you didn't worry about yourself. I was just using that old adage--you can't fix others. And I didn't understand mil and fil. Ahh, but having typed them I do!! HA! I couldn't figure out what cool country you were from. You know, Mum...I though mil, hmm... fil, makes sense.
But I would wonder what your fil tells your mil. But as the adult who has traditionally drank too much at get togethers, telling her may just make her mad. It always did me. Since I "didn't have a problem" it was none of their business.
Congrats on Day 6. We are at exactly the same point.
But I would wonder what your fil tells your mil. But as the adult who has traditionally drank too much at get togethers, telling her may just make her mad. It always did me. Since I "didn't have a problem" it was none of their business.
Congrats on Day 6. We are at exactly the same point.
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