Brette

I'm sitting feet away from a bottle of cognac while friends have dropped over for an evening of watching THE GODFATHER (again!). I'm the only one not drinking.

No one knows I'm going sober -- nor that I'll be seven days by tomorrow. This is a big deal for me.

And I don't want to tell them because I talk about it, then they're going to ask questions. Or worse, they'll tell me I don't have a problem.

Don't you hate that?

Just reaching out to you all... I'm going to make it to Day 7... even as I feel myself outright nervous. I can actually smell the cognac too. Annoying.

Ranger

One will be too many yet the entire bottle won't be enough, my Friend.

Stay strong. Wish I could teleport you a clothspin for your schnoz.

daviddocum

I understand why you don't' want to tell them and deal with "talking about it". Sometimes it would be nice to just quit and never think about it.

Just pour everyone one else really strong drinks so they finish off the bottle and get it out of your face.

BHF

May as well plan on talking to them about it. If you're serious about not drinking and you plan on maintaining your friendship with them then they gotta know. You'll likely be surprised. In my situation, after my friends knew that I was trying not to drink, they never tried to coerce me into doing so. Sure, the amount of things I did with them decreased, because I wasnt drinking anymore, but that's to be expected. They still make a point to include me in things and it's so much more comfortable since they knew and there was no tension in the air surrounding why I was not drinking.

I'll tell you one reason why I had been hesitant to tell people that I was quitting drinking - because if I decided that I was gonna drink, then I wouldn't have to explain that too. If you tell them that you're no longer drink,ing, your taking out just a little more insurance against that next drink.

Brette

I only "got that" after reading SOBER LIVING about a week ago. THANKS always for the reminder. Just for the record, I got thru it last night... it was cool being able to log on here and just PUT IT OUT THERE! Thanks for being there!

Brette

David -- you are correct. Eventually I will tell folks that I'm not drinking. But first I'm tiptoeing through all this. I'm not only experiencing NOT drinking, but now I'm dealing with OTHER PEOPLE'S feelings about my not drinking.... (which really is NONE of my biz, as the saying goes). Regardless, thank you for that prompt. Certainly there's lots to consider...

Brette

You make a good point BHF... There's a lot to be said for my pos. wanting to create an "out" for myself. Good call.

EmeraldRose

Hi Brette and welcome!!

Reading through these posts I would say it would be up to you in the right time to let them know -or not. I don't know how good of friends they are or they're understanding level. Some folks say "hey, good for you, wish I could". Others may say "What a whimp -just have one!". When the time is right you will know in your heart if you should indulge your little secret with others.
I took longer than I should in telling my own brother. I knew he'd understand simce he had done couneling and is involved in the medical field and 'highly educated'. LOL I waited till I knew I was ready and knew that it was the right time. Of course, he was understanding and all that -but *I* needed to feel ready.
You'll know...especially if they are constantly taunting you with booze. You may have to tell them sooner than expected.
Glad you're here.