RV GTO

I was at a party when I turned 21, the person serving the alcohol said "you're supposed to sip these, not guzzle." Looking back on it, that was the start.

College was a drunkfest - rated biggest drinking school at the time..... dumb decision

And least, I can so relate with the shakes, horrible

My father was a tea tottler, my mother drank but she was not an alcohollic. My grandparents were total drunks according to my mother.

Genes, environment, who knows.... all I know is that alcoholism sucks.

Latte

Looking back? Almost every single time I drank starting when I was 16. I didn't have to drink all the time, but every time I drank I got drunk.

I had times in my life where I could control it. I'm so glad I don't have to ever worry about that again.

tallcactus

While inlisted in the Military, in Texas, was drinking and do not remember a thing; my first blackout at age 24. That was the start of the "problem." Continued to drink for another 25 years...insantity.

Ranger

Within a few weeks of my first drink I was content to sit at my dorm room desk on Friday night and kill a sixer while my non-drinking friends played nintendo or whatever.

I never, ever needed a drinking partner. Alcohol was the only great love affair of my 20s and early 30s.

Reset

At least 3 or 4 times a week in college, I would get really drunk or high, or both.

DrunkenBasement

A difficult question to answer because I think in the back of my mind I was always a bit leery of my relationship with alcohol. I heard a woman at a meeting last week say that long before she ever took her first sip of alchohol, she felt like she needed a drink. That was me, too.

I didn't feel bad about drinking alone until I realized that I was hiding it. I lived with a couple of other girls around the time I was 23, I drank someting nearly every night, and at some point I started hiding it. I knew that wasn't normal.

But like I said, it is hard to really pinpoint it because I always felt like there was something abnormal about my relationship with alcohol.

DrunkenBasement

Me, too, but I thought that was just what college kids did. I realize now that that isn't true. That's just what the college kids that I chose to surround myself with did.

Philly

Wow great question! I don't come on SR very often anymore but I liked reading the responses to this question.

I don't know when I crossed the line but I think the first time I began to really like drinking was my early 40's (never had a desire to drink before that). It changed the first time I had some margarita's in the afternoon with some friends. Before that it never occurred to me to drink in the daytime. About 7 or 8 years later I was drinking every weekend all weekend long or whenever I didn't have work. The end came when I had to drive 90 miles home on a hangover and drank 2 times before going to work just to get home. I got caught the 2 week and the sh*t hit the fan. I am a professional and had to admit I had a problem. I consider myself lucky because I think I was one small step away to drinking every day or something really bad happening. I was starting to black out and my tolerance was through the roof which means I was killing myself with all that poison. I am now over 2 and a half years sober after quitting that dreadful day. It was the first time I quit and I hope it is the last.

I do not belong to AA so I stop in every once in awhile just to keep reminding me why I don't drink anymore.

Thanks for the refresher!!

Missy7

I don't know where I got a bottle of Spanada at thirteen but I remember lying on the couch drinking it and listening to Alice Cooper's Only Women Bleed again and again. My parents were on the other side of the wall, Dad drunk and mom on prescription pain killers. I soon figured out that I could add in some of her drugs--valium sometimes but Talwin (whatever that is) was a pleasant addition. Then I could imagine the trophies in the cabinet were full size while the radio blared. No one knew. It didn't matter.

Zebra1275

I drank in college, usually to get drunk, but everybody in my dorm did. In fact, many of them drank way more than me and others sorta looked up to me because I studied hard, got good grades and was quite successful. So I thought my drinking was normal and that I didn't have a problem.

After leaving college, entering my profession and moving to a city by myself far from home I realized I had a problem. I found myself drinking alone in my apartment many nights. While I realized that drinking alone wasn't good, I rationalized it because I was successful in other aspects of life. Acknowledging I was an alcoholic took a long time.

MsCooterBrown

I started this post 3 times now..I keep deleting what I write because no one wants to hear the WHOLE story..but my mom hit 10 different doctors to get 10 different prescriptions..she had all kinds of sh!t..eventually it killed her. With her in la la land and my dad having numerous affairs (never home early that is for sure) it left alot of time for me to be out and about with no one home to care what time I came in. I found the party kids at a very young age. We lived in a subdivision with model homes. New neighborhood..we would break in after dark and drink our beer. Squatters before our time.. I soon found out that my moms pills enhanced my buzz..bigtime. How I didn't end up dead amazes me to this day. In 9th grade I got introduced to blotter acid. Spent the next 4 yrs tripping. LSD25 and Orange Sunshine.. I had a "cool" twenty something art teacher in high school that I ran around with. He supplied anything I wanted. Without going on and on...I didn't care how I got there..but I was all over anything mind altering. I met husband number one when I was 18. He was 13 yrs older than I.
I stopped doing all the drugs and stuck with alcohol. I actually took a time out from drinking for maybe 5 yrs. I started again when husband #2 and I got together. And lemme tell ya..husband #2 would drive anyone to drink...ANYWAY spent another 25 yrs pounding drinks. I feel like this is a whole new world for me. I have not been sober or remember being sober for YEARS. There is absolutely NO WAY in hell I will return to that sick crazy lifestyle. All or nothing from day one for me.

EmeraldRose

My 30 year career started as an apprenticeship. But I knew as soon as I started in this field that it would be a passionate employment where I was my own boss.
Although I didn't make a habit of waking up to drink I found myself 'waiting' for 'that time a day' I thought appropriate to start. Soon 'that time of day' was earlier and earlier in the day. And before I knew it I was saying 'its 5:00 somewhere.' Literally.
I can remember the feeling of reaching over the fridge every 5 minutes to grab the gallon of Jack and the feeling I got when the bottle would get lighter and lighter and the panic I feared that I'd have to load up the kids and make a fake milk run to the store so I could buy more.
I can't say as that's the 'first' time I knew...I always enjoyed drinking, I always had to have beer or when offered a drink -never said no. Ever. Everytime I drank I got drunk. I can't remember any time that I had a few beers or a couple drinks and didn't expect to feel something. It was inevidable.
Its' so refreshing not to depend on a mind altering medicine.

JTele

While the statement I made above is entirely true while also confirming the notion that I might indeed be an alcoholic, I think there were a number of other signs, too. I've been drinking fairly regularly for at least 22 years, but once I found myself out of work due to the lousy economy (early 2008), my drinking obviously escalated above and beyond what it had previously been. Even though I knew I was becoming an alcoholic and very much addicted, I pretty much ignored the signs. I think I just enjoyed drinking too much to really care. But, here are a few more examples that essentially confirmed that my drinking had spiraled out of control.

*When the recyling people would awaken me from a hangover upon hearing my 65-gallon recyling bin full of empty beer bottles crashing into the recycling truck.

*When entering a local tavern once every week and the bartender has a bottle of my favorite beer already waiting on the bar for me.

*When having a "traveler" (beer) was an essential beverage while driving my car to practically any evening occasion outside of the home.

*When having a bottle opener was an absolute essential car item accessory (I liked good beer w/no twist-off caps).

*When having a spare bottle opener was always a bonus in the event the other opener might happen to fall under the car seat while driving. Key-chain openers are especially good for this purpose.

*When making certain that more than enough beer or other alcoholic beverages were always available in the event I wanted to drink more than I had originally anticipated.

I'm sure I could think of several more, but I tend to think there were a number of signs that all accumulated at about the same time, and I honestly can't say what came first.

Zini

So many interesting responses. Thanks to all of you for sharing your personal stories. There's a lot to think about here. I guess the consensus seems to be that all the warning signs were out in the open, very early - we just didn't know where to look.
At the same time, we had to go as far as we did to know just how far we would go. There's no use crying over spilt milk (or vodka), and I am truly grateful for being sober.
Just also feeling oddly mournful today about my lost "friend", who was no friend at all really. It's a feeling, and it will pass, but it was quite helpful reading all your posts on this of all days.
Thanks to all the members of the fantastic SR community...