tired of myself?
 

Hi..I'm 5 weeks today not drinkin and I think it took 35 days for me to grow tired of myself. No it's true..I'm officially sick of me. Is that possible? It's the only real explanation for what I'm feeling. Maybe before, I got to escape sometimes..I mean when I was drinking I was still me, but kind of a different form of me. This same ol', same ol' every day is wearing on me today. This constant..this consistent me. Does that make any sense?

Awwww Mirage, We're not tired of you, you are a great person :)

Maybe you need to try some new things with yourself. Pick up a class, or take up a sport, or maybe even take a break from yourself and creatively write stories or read a novel.

I know how you feel though, right now I'm angry with myself and want to kick my own ***!

Hang in there Mirage :)

:hug:
I'm really pleased to see you here again
I so hope this will be your time for lasting sobriety
:yup:

I didn't much care for myself once upon a time....in order to stay sober I had to change that.

Are you doing anything positive for yourself other than not drinking?

Thanks Stace..and thank you Carol.

LaFemme..Well it's not that I don't like myself, I think I'm adjusting to the consistency of my feelings if you know what I mean. I'm not wanting to drink over it or anything. And no, I guess I really haven't done anything in addition to not drinking, besides watching what I'm eating more and a bit of exercise. (I'm currently in a boot due to a pulled tendon, so can't do a whole lot.) That might be driving me a bit nutty, too, I guess. Maybe it was more of a vent..just wondered if anyone had these kinds of feelings. Thanks for responding. :)

I think sometimes when we stop drinking we have to come face to face with our demons. Even if a demon is ourself. It's easier and more comfortable to be unsober. We are used to that -it is easy and a way of life.
I don't think I'm sick of me as much as I was sick of how I was treating myself and create turmoil in life. I think when we decide to stay sober those feelings loom thick in the air and we need to deal with them. It was easy to pop a cork and not worry about it...now I make an effort and its working. I like me...I like the way my life is going. There is a time and place for everything and you're time will come where it all fits together.
Wishing you the best.

Maybe it's just a little plateau...... I have times when I just want to change things up, change my mood, too.... Today has been like that. Sometimes it's just a blah day. Sometimes I have a hard time just taking a break, enjoying a restful day. Just "being."

When I feel really down, gratitudes helps, and not feeding myself negative thoughts. Also - It helps me to stay in the moment and quiet my mind.

Easier said than done, but better than a drink!:c043:

I really needed to get comfortable with myself...I'd never done that as an adult and it took some time. I was not at all comfortable with myself or my own company, but I found it got easier the longer I stayed sober.

I guess I spent a lot of time working on filling the void within me I used to fill with alcohol.

For me, I don't think events or activities fill that void, although they help - I think healing did.

I had some counselling to help, and so as to not focus on myself too exclusively I did some work helping others - I think, paradoxically, that was the greatest factor in me getting to know myself :)



D

My feelings bring me down sometimes. I know how you feel.

I have to get out of my head. I find that some heavy sweating helps this. That would probably be difficult with a boot on though.

Is there a place you can volunteer? Showing up at my kids school to read, staple papers, monitor the playground can help reset my brain.

Makes perfect sense if you are not doing anything other than not drinking in sobriety. Now you are sober and still have the same issues you hda before. have heard this from many people.

Question is, what are you going to do, what are you willing to do, to change?

Wearing a boot would make most people a little wonky....especially if you are usually pretty active:)

Still, some form of therapy seems beneficial to most people. I have a life coach who is super awesome:)

I can understand how you're feeling mirage. I messed up with alcohol and cannot have it in my life anymore.

But I still miss it. I miss the fun times laughing with my friends, the stupid things we would do. I miss feeling the tension leaving my body. Drinking did not always end up in a disaster. Sometimes I would drink, fall asleep and wake up feeling great and ready for the day.

But I remember when I messed up and why I can never drink again. But it's still hard.

It might help to do things that are fun for you. Walking on the beach, watching a great movie, going out to lunch with your friends. You could structure your week so it includes some favorite things and fun time.