LosingmyMisery

In early recovery, we need all the help we can get. Push past your comfort zone. Anything new is uncomfortable in the beginning. It takes time and great effort. The pay off will be well worth it. I ride the bus to work everyday. I use the time to reflect on what my life used to be and what it is today. Great time for reflection.

johnnymau

This sound like isolating...something I can totally relate to! By the end of my drinking career, it was just me and the bottle. I did not like to drink around (or even be around) other people. The reason I did not like to drink around other people was this: my alcoholism had progressed to a point where, when I had had enough drinks to make me feel better, by then I was already unable to talk coherently.

When I quit drinking, it was definitely a challenge to get myself out into the world and begin to live my life among people again. With practice, it got better pretty quickly though, and I hope the same thing happens for you!

littlefish

I spent hours drinking every day: up to 10 hours. And I count being hungover and then drinking on top of a hangover drinking time too....
I go to a Friday meeting religiously...it takes 45 minutes to get there on the bus, the train and then the subway...and then 60 minutes to get back so all of my Friday night is spent getting to my meeting; about 4 hours total.
I usually drank to throwup/blackout every Friday night for 3 decades so that awful coffee, I am usually the one making it, tastes soooooo good.

ulfr

I talked with my sponsor about this and she said that i need to go to meetings every day because i slipped up today and drank.
I went to an AA meeting tonight but still didn't speak my shyness is really bad right now
i had planned what i wanted to say in my head but when it came to me talking i just passed.

Pete55

Just keep going and listen to your sponsor.
The only suggestion I may add, from my own expirience in early sobriety, I went to most types of meetings, workshops, BB study groups,step workshops, as much as possible and became stuck to one home group, preferably one that has structre, because my head at the time was very un-structred!
The BB study groups were essential to, it seemed to cut through the calamaty thinking. That's what worked in my early days.

Hollyanne

Hi Willow,
That was good to get to a meeting even though you drank.
Don't worry about sharing. No one has to talk. Eliminate that cause for anxiety right now.

Alcohol causes anxiety!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alcohol causes depression!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The detox period of a couple of weeks, we are a bit of a mess.
Then we stabilize and begin a few months of coming out of the fog.
I would not trust my thinking now, and I am 5 months in.
While it is not OK to slip, because it is a rotten and harmful feeling, it does happen so just stick with it.
With regard to prayer, your ears would curl if you heard the "prayers" I started with, but I started to go on my knees (not in BB or anything). I found it kind of defined that time for me by taking a position. I would think a meditation position would be the same. I would be afraid I couldn't untangle myself from the lotus position! LOL.

Good thread you started by the way.
:ghug3

LosingmyMisery

I agree, don't worry about speaking. When you are more comfortable and ready you will speak. I used to stress over having to speak, but I thought "why" so I just listened until I was ready to speak. Honestly, I had a huge fear of public speaking and AA got me past that and the fear is gone.