Young & Worried
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1
Young & Worried
I'm not sure exactly where I'm going with this, but here goes.
I am a 21 year old girl. Barely 21. I conquered an addiction to weed and prescription narcotics that began when I was 13, and survived a suicide attempt at 15. I had an "aha!" moment in the mental hospital after my attempt, quit everything cold turkey, received treatment for my ADHD, and suddenly became very successful. Scholarships, awards honor roll, letters from Ivy League schools, 1,000s of hours of volunteer work... I really started kicking butt.
I also burnt myself out bad and dropped out of college after sophomore year. I now have a very good job - I'll just say that I work in public safety. Although I truly enjoy my job, I deal with death, tragedy, unbelievably disrespectful citizens, and high-intensity situations daily.
I drink pretty much nightly - like 3-4 drinks. I think regularly about quitting but just end up drinking compulsively anyways. I'm concerned because I know I have a personal history of addiction, my birth-mother and birth-father (I'm adopted) had a history of alcohol abuse in their 20's, and my mom is addicted to prescription narcotics and has been for the majority of my life.
Although my habit currently has had no significant ill effects (no troubles w/ health, work, the law, relationships, etc) I'm concerned about the path it will take. I know my fiancee is somewhat uncomfortable with it as well, in part because his brother died very young due to an isopropyl alcohol OD (he was a severe alcoholic).
I drink because I want to get away from the stress and terrible things I deal with at work, because I'm bored, and because I'm a chronic novelty seeker.
So here I am.
I am a 21 year old girl. Barely 21. I conquered an addiction to weed and prescription narcotics that began when I was 13, and survived a suicide attempt at 15. I had an "aha!" moment in the mental hospital after my attempt, quit everything cold turkey, received treatment for my ADHD, and suddenly became very successful. Scholarships, awards honor roll, letters from Ivy League schools, 1,000s of hours of volunteer work... I really started kicking butt.
I also burnt myself out bad and dropped out of college after sophomore year. I now have a very good job - I'll just say that I work in public safety. Although I truly enjoy my job, I deal with death, tragedy, unbelievably disrespectful citizens, and high-intensity situations daily.
I drink pretty much nightly - like 3-4 drinks. I think regularly about quitting but just end up drinking compulsively anyways. I'm concerned because I know I have a personal history of addiction, my birth-mother and birth-father (I'm adopted) had a history of alcohol abuse in their 20's, and my mom is addicted to prescription narcotics and has been for the majority of my life.
Although my habit currently has had no significant ill effects (no troubles w/ health, work, the law, relationships, etc) I'm concerned about the path it will take. I know my fiancee is somewhat uncomfortable with it as well, in part because his brother died very young due to an isopropyl alcohol OD (he was a severe alcoholic).
I drink because I want to get away from the stress and terrible things I deal with at work, because I'm bored, and because I'm a chronic novelty seeker.
So here I am.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Hi ember 
I think you're very wise to be concerned now...a few drinks to unwind at night after a hard day is how I started too...it can be a swift yet almost imperceptible slide downwards.
I know you'll find a lot of support here
Welcome!
D
I think you're very wise to be concerned now...a few drinks to unwind at night after a hard day is how I started too...it can be a swift yet almost imperceptible slide downwards.
I know you'll find a lot of support here
Welcome!
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
Hi and Welcome,
It's not surprising that you have moved from addiction to addiction. That often happens with people, even when they seem to be doing well. The thing is we need to get to the root of what caused us to become addicted and then learn to deal in healthy ways. Alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse if you don't stop drinking.
There is lots of support here so take a look around and make yourself at home.
It's not surprising that you have moved from addiction to addiction. That often happens with people, even when they seem to be doing well. The thing is we need to get to the root of what caused us to become addicted and then learn to deal in healthy ways. Alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse if you don't stop drinking.
There is lots of support here so take a look around and make yourself at home.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: South Dakota
Posts: 1,061
"I drink because I want to get away from the stress and terrible things I deal with at work, because I'm bored, and because I'm a chronic novelty seeker."
Sounds like the same reasons I started and now I'm dealing with a 15+ year problem that is not easy to fix. Please try to stop now, dealing with stress and boredom is much better with a clear head than an alcohol induced haze.
Sounds like the same reasons I started and now I'm dealing with a 15+ year problem that is not easy to fix. Please try to stop now, dealing with stress and boredom is much better with a clear head than an alcohol induced haze.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
Welcome Ember.
After 30 years of drinking I have quit...I'm glad you are here NOW!!
Like you, I am adopted but unfortunately don't know the history of my biologicals except they were in art school. My adoptive parents don't drink (Well, Dad like a beer now and again) but I am the only one that has swam upstream in the whiskey river.
It is good you know your history and can now take precautions.
After 30 years of drinking I have quit...I'm glad you are here NOW!!
Like you, I am adopted but unfortunately don't know the history of my biologicals except they were in art school. My adoptive parents don't drink (Well, Dad like a beer now and again) but I am the only one that has swam upstream in the whiskey river.
It is good you know your history and can now take precautions.
You are smart to tackle this problem now while it's not too terrible (yet) and while you have your whole life ahead of you.SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Good to have you here! We have quite a few members in their 20's and I'm always impressed to see someone so young decide to get sober. You will be saving yourself years of misery......
It sounds like you have a lot of insight into yourself - have you ever done any one-on-one therapy? I started drinking in my late teens and was having trouble with depression before that, but never got it diagnosed until years later.
Using alcohol to cope with our lives just adds another huge problem....
Keep reading and posting - there's lot of support here!
It sounds like you have a lot of insight into yourself - have you ever done any one-on-one therapy? I started drinking in my late teens and was having trouble with depression before that, but never got it diagnosed until years later.
Using alcohol to cope with our lives just adds another huge problem....
Keep reading and posting - there's lot of support here!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 316
Welcome, ember! I'm about your age and have a history of mental health problems as well. From my recent experience, you're right to be concerned. I thought I could just "keep an eye on my drinking" and it spiraled out of control so quickly. I'm not saying this would happen to you... but as I've been told, social drinkers don't worry about alcohol because they don't have to try to control it. If you think you have some sort of a problem, you probably do.
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