least

I've been stressed a lot lately. My mother's decline into dementia and now my little dog has a serious condition. Yesterday my one kid asked me for a favor... which turned into several favors, all requiring money and time and gasoline... so I was seething in resentment most of the day.

Not surprisingly I had a thought of drinking. Just one spilt second thought, and it was easily dismissed, but it scared me that after almost sixteen happy sober months the thought of drinking to cope could still come up.

I didn't give in to it, of course, just dismissed it as the BS it was, but just thought I'd put it out there that the struggle never really goes away, just goes dormant for a while, it seems.

Be prepared for it, no matter where you are in sobriety. Forewarned is forearmed.

sailorjohn

Well dear, you will love this.

Had the insanest thought yesterday at lunch, grab a NA beer at the DFAC.

I don't like NA beer, didn't like it when I was drinking, pretty sure I wouldn't like it now.

Pretty weird, right?

Zube

Resentment was the theme of my "smoking" AA mtg. last night. I noticed that people tend to smoke more during topics like these. Chain smoke.

Went home smelling like an ashtray.

Zube

laurie6781

For years .................................. my solution to everything and I do mean everything ............ joy, sadness, pity, regret, anger, resentment, etc was to have a drink (well actually many drinks, but it always started with one, lol).

Now, even today, although I have 'trained' myself to 'new ways', 'new actions', etc once in a while a 'brief' fleeting thought of having a drink, as a solution, will 'flit' through my head, roflmao You see, that 'old solution' was a solution for so many years that it can still 'pop' up as a solution today.

Now, the corker to these 'fleeting' thoughts is ...................... do I act on them .......................... and, of course, the answer is ............................... a BIG RESOUNDING 'NO'.

I guess what I am trying to say is I just look at those 'pop ups' as a fleeting rminder of how I 'used to' handle things, and I certainly do not have tgo use them today.

J M H O and experience.

Love and hugs,

Anna

Least, acknowledging resentments and letting go of them is hugely important in recovery, as you have found. Good for you for getting through the moment. I have a very stressful (in a good way) period coming up in a few weeks and I am alrleady feeling concerned. For me, it's not the thought of drinking, but the thought of losing my balance. So, I'm starting to take some extra B vitamins and upping my exercise program.

Dee74

Well as most of you know I was recently reminded about balance and taking care of myself ....I didn't want to drink but my head nearly exploded lol.

I'm sorry you're in such stressful times least - lean on us, and keep working on ways to cut out some of the stress you don't need to deal with, and to deal healthily with the stress you have no choice with

D

Manz

Hi Least,

You know I really like to read your posts, there is always something inspirational in the openness of your sharing. So thankyou. It truly does help someone like me that is new to sobriety.

I too am learning new ways of coping with stress and resentments(to name just a couple of emotions LOL) in a sober and healthy way. And it is a great reminder to know that this will need to always be a consideration. We just can not become complacent.

I hope your stress reduces soon, I am sorry you are going through such a tough time...I can relate.

Big Hugs Least

Hevyn

Least, I was always having those thoughts the first year - I was like Laurie - used alcohol to deal with any kind of emotion or situation. I've passed my third year of dealing with life without anesthesia, and this past year I finally don't give it a thought when hard times come along.

I'm sure I can't completely relax and expect it never to happen again - one day it probably will. Thank you for the reminder - we must always be vigillant.

artsoul

I had a day like that last week - all three kids needed a piece of me and I was trying to meet a deadline. There are still days when I want to escape from all the responsibilities, but thanks to you I remember to count my blessings instead.

I can't imagine how difficult it must be to see your mom decline - I see a few signs in my mom, too, but nothing troubling yet.

Glad you posted - I think you're doing GREAT!!:ghug3

yoli

Sorry to hear you are having a bumpy time Least. It's hard when aging hits your parents. Also your dog is your child. That's how I feel about mine too. And kids require a lot of attention and effort.

I had a hard and stressful day at work today thrown in with a little road rage. It's just the nature of my job. I actually started craving a drink which I always have on Tuesdays, cause they're usually stressful. I had a full-on craving after work and then my car passed by the convenience store I usually stop at. As soon as I passed, my craving disappeared!!

So with some patience and fortitude the cravings will leave, for now. We Can Do It!!!!!!

fulminouscherub

Hi Least,

I hear you. It's hard not to give in to stress and resentment. Some days are certainly better than others.

Thanks for sharing the message with another alcoholic (like me), that it's possible to face our troubles and stay sober, one day at a time.