The Secret to Staying Sober is
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,126
Hey EmeraldRose ---
"...Tonight at rehab we touched on the words recovering vs. recovered.
There is no recovered alcoholic. You are always a recovering alcoholic -every new day! It is alot of work to have that thorn in your side every single day. Gawd, sometimes I wish I just never even started. *sigh*..."
I'm sorry you've been told, at your 'rehab,' that there are no 'recovered' alcoholics, that we're all only 'recovering' alcoholics, and that's for always.....Now, I guess I know where this 'recovering' stuff comes from; treatment/rehab centers.....and it's all bogus....
Like my nearest and dearest friends in recovery, we ALL are 'recovered' alcoholics.........we've quit for good 'n all; just like it says in AA's BigBook. If I'd been told at the jump that I'd never be recovered; just be recovering for the rest of my life, and a lot of work too, forever...........?.....well, I'd have never started on this road of happy destiny.....and as for it being 'a lot of work' well, I've always hated work in any form (the easier the better) I've always figured it's as 'easy' or as 'hard' as I wanna make it, and for me, sobriety is the 'easier, softer' way.....
Check it out, for verification, in the BB, in the first 164 pgs (that's where the Program is located, and not the stories), you'll find 13 references to being recovered, and only 1 reference to recovering (in the chapter to the family, 'for the wife of a husband who is recovering).
So, for me, and all my 'recovered' friends, we'll stick to what AA's BB says, and get, and stay, recovered........
(o:
NoelleR
"...Tonight at rehab we touched on the words recovering vs. recovered.
There is no recovered alcoholic. You are always a recovering alcoholic -every new day! It is alot of work to have that thorn in your side every single day. Gawd, sometimes I wish I just never even started. *sigh*..."
I'm sorry you've been told, at your 'rehab,' that there are no 'recovered' alcoholics, that we're all only 'recovering' alcoholics, and that's for always.....Now, I guess I know where this 'recovering' stuff comes from; treatment/rehab centers.....and it's all bogus....
Like my nearest and dearest friends in recovery, we ALL are 'recovered' alcoholics.........we've quit for good 'n all; just like it says in AA's BigBook. If I'd been told at the jump that I'd never be recovered; just be recovering for the rest of my life, and a lot of work too, forever...........?.....well, I'd have never started on this road of happy destiny.....and as for it being 'a lot of work' well, I've always hated work in any form (the easier the better) I've always figured it's as 'easy' or as 'hard' as I wanna make it, and for me, sobriety is the 'easier, softer' way.....
Check it out, for verification, in the BB, in the first 164 pgs (that's where the Program is located, and not the stories), you'll find 13 references to being recovered, and only 1 reference to recovering (in the chapter to the family, 'for the wife of a husband who is recovering).
So, for me, and all my 'recovered' friends, we'll stick to what AA's BB says, and get, and stay, recovered........
(o:
NoelleR
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Congrats on your 8 months sober!! 
I work on my sobriety every day. I celebrate living sober every day, starting with being grateful when I wake up sober and happy.
Everything I do now is possible because I'm sober.
I work on my sobriety every day. I celebrate living sober every day, starting with being grateful when I wake up sober and happy.
Everything I do now is possible because I'm sober. 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 73
Congrats on 8 months! I always get alot out of your posts. You've helped many.
I do think there is kind of a secret formula. Just not one. Everyone's different. It may be AA. Mayve AA+SR. Throw in a little private counseling. Finding your spiritual center. Maybe all of the above. But whatever it takes, you're right... it's work, perserverence and not giving up.
After many failed attempts I may have found my own "secret sauce". We'll see. Thanks again Lafemme!
I do think there is kind of a secret formula. Just not one. Everyone's different. It may be AA. Mayve AA+SR. Throw in a little private counseling. Finding your spiritual center. Maybe all of the above. But whatever it takes, you're right... it's work, perserverence and not giving up.
After many failed attempts I may have found my own "secret sauce". We'll see. Thanks again Lafemme!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
I STILL marvel at my sobriety every morning....and give thanks for it....because i KNOW how i exacerbated my depression by drinking.
reading here and interacting is something i can do for myself 10X a day if needed....reading about other people's triumphs and struggles makes me feel stronger too.
LeFemme has been using an approach i can relate to...i certainly admire the logic.
reading here and interacting is something i can do for myself 10X a day if needed....reading about other people's triumphs and struggles makes me feel stronger too.
LeFemme has been using an approach i can relate to...i certainly admire the logic.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
I think of *shopping* as a big treat because I have some extra $$$ now that booze no longer soaks it up....(until the next round of gasoline hikes i guess).
when i was drinking I did not shop, no interest, now i'm like a kid in the stores.
my first *reward* for not drinking was to buy myself some wonderful high-thread count sheets...because I was finally sleeping like a normal person!!! i have slept more in the past year, than I did for the last 10 drinking.
when i was drinking I did not shop, no interest, now i'm like a kid in the stores.
my first *reward* for not drinking was to buy myself some wonderful high-thread count sheets...because I was finally sleeping like a normal person!!! i have slept more in the past year, than I did for the last 10 drinking.
New to Real Life
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: I come in Peaces
Posts: 2,071
I enjoy shopping for the first time, too! Even something like a new candle for the kitchen can really brighten my day. Simple things.
We just got back from a weekend trip and I unpacked that day. It hit me that I had never done that before. Always my suitcase would lie in the basement floor, open and half emptied. Sometimes for weeks. Sad. Just a real lack of self-care.
We just got back from a weekend trip and I unpacked that day. It hit me that I had never done that before. Always my suitcase would lie in the basement floor, open and half emptied. Sometimes for weeks. Sad. Just a real lack of self-care.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Morris NJ
Posts: 1
Originally Posted by LaFemme 
WORK AT IT
They say that if you want to stay sober find the people with long term sobriety and do what they do. The thing is if you put all of them in the same room they would all have different approaches to it. The one commonality I see among all the long term happy and healthy sober people is that they have all worked at...usually extremely hard and especially in the beginning.
There is no magic pill, there is no secret formula, there is no master plan.....except work.
That's just the way I see it at 8 months sober. I wanted to share it with all the newcomers because its the single most important thing I have learned
They say that if you want to stay sober find the people with long term sobriety and do what they do. The thing is if you put all of them in the same room they would all have different approaches to it. The one commonality I see among all the long term happy and healthy sober people is that they have all worked at...usually extremely hard and especially in the beginning.
There is no magic pill, there is no secret formula, there is no master plan.....except work.
That's just the way I see it at 8 months sober. I wanted to share it with all the newcomers because its the single most important thing I have learned
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,237
Congratulations on your 8 months girl!!! That's awesome!!! you are proof that working at it...will produce positive results!!!!!!
I am grateful everyday for my sobriety!! and for all the blessings, and lessons I am learning....Eyes wide open now!! and here's to embracing all that comes our way!!! SOBER and PEACEFUL with it!!!
That's awesome!!! you are proof that working at it...will produce positive results!!!!!!I am grateful everyday for my sobriety!! and for all the blessings, and lessons I am learning....Eyes wide open now!! and here's to embracing all that comes our way!!! SOBER and PEACEFUL with it!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Hi Bruda and welcome to SR.
My belief is that everyone has a somewhat unique path but for many the work involves a formal program probably 12 step like AA or SMART so that's a good place to start. SR is also full of good suggestions but might get overwhelming. The first few days are hard...for me I pretty much stayed in bed and did nothing...then I discovered SR. Reading and posting here is part of the work I do to stay sober...being part of this community matters...at least to me.
Good to see you and stick around...we want you here
My belief is that everyone has a somewhat unique path but for many the work involves a formal program probably 12 step like AA or SMART so that's a good place to start. SR is also full of good suggestions but might get overwhelming. The first few days are hard...for me I pretty much stayed in bed and did nothing...then I discovered SR. Reading and posting here is part of the work I do to stay sober...being part of this community matters...at least to me.
Good to see you and stick around...we want you here
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