LeadHatter

I feel alone now-when i post in under90days its only me and occasionally pennywhistle. I have a soak of an alcie next door have discovered i am maybe a codependanty personality in the last 2 days and im totally stalling in my recovery.

i feel obsessive about the man next door and quite mad-unfortunately i know from experience using alcohol or pornography would make me forget my anxieties-yet what other alternative have i?

feel like my support is used up

kevin

LeadHatter

further to this i wonder if i have developed a sugar addiction since my usual cola treat (which is diet thistime in a bid to lose wieght) has been doing nothing for me all day and now im eating mints (virtually pure sugar) i feel a bit grounded although maybe asking for help here and looking on aa website for a meeting has helped 2 but i deffo think it maybe summut to do with the sugar

shame sugar is bad for your bones, health, diabeties, fat etc etc

artsoul

I definitely developed a sweet tooth after quitting..... I think you're right that the pure sugar can create its own issues (ups and downs), but it also helps with the cravings. I know that it took about three months or so for my eating habits and appetite to return to normal. After about 4 months, I started losing weight (and lost about 20 lbs. now at 10 months sober without really trying).....

Have you checked out the Family and Friends of Alcoholics section of the forum? It does sound like you're focusing on your friend instead of yourself.

There lots of options for adding to your recovery, and seeing an addiction counselor or psychiatrist can't hurt either, especially if you're feeling depressed and unable to move foward.

Prayers and hugs going out to you. Just don't drink - remember that this is a process and it takes months if not years to heal..... "this too shall pass.":ghug3

MsCooterBrown

I need to go to a Ben and Jerrys rehab. NEVER ate anything sweet before and now I am ADDICTED to Karamel Sutra. We all have our cross we must drag around. If you are in between a rock and a hard place..pick porn.
Just don't pick up that 1st drink. Sober porn is our goal.
And as for the neighbor..he is a sick alky. Think of how hungover he is daily and you are not. You are on 2 months sober!!! WAY TO GO!
And remember..you are not assigned to the 90 days and under group. No need to sit in that forum alone. We will support you too! Great job on 90 days. Keep it up!

passionfruit

Hi kevin!!

You are welcome to come to F&F anytime. We are there frequently. We have alanon-type meetings 3-4 times a week if you are interested. You need a password to go to the Family meeting chat room at those times.

If you would like the password, please pm me or Kassie2.

I read somewhere that alcoholism is a sugar addiction. When my AH attempts to get sober, his sugar intake skyrockets also.

I think this is normal.

We are here backing you up but it is not the same as face to face interaction with people.

I don't know who you feel about AA or alanon but I personally have attended 1 AA meeting and was welcome as an alanon member. We have AA's in our alanon meetings and they are welcome.

So reach out. I have been struggling with different issues than you , but it is a struggle nonetheless.

Somedays I think I go into panic mode, others depression and its up and down back and forth.

I am doing alot of reading, alot of writing, and alot of talking.

helps somedays doesnt others.

Do not feel alone.

I will pray for you and i send you strength telepathically ( lol ). I am here for you.

NYCDoglvr

I described early recovery as being like 24 hour/day PMS in a full moon! It's part of getting sober and it will pass. I promise you it gets better.

TotoBidule

I agree with MsCooter - pick porn. You have already done so much work on the alcohol it would be insane for that to be lost. If you also have a porn consumption problem then I'd get to that when you completely stop thinking about alcohol... If you don't have a porn problem, then get to it when you get a partner!

GettingStronger2

Kevin, first let me tell you, many of us addicts are codependent. Just comes with the disease. We have to work on that as well.

2 months for some reason is a hard time. I know it was for me, and i have heard it from others. You can do it, just stay strong and remember why you are doing this. Keep reaching out and getting the support you need. you can do this.

Taking5

Kevin,

Are you in AA? What else are you doing except the "under 90 days" thread? You can surely post in F&F or just in Alcoholism forum, and in the 12 step forum if you're an AA guy.

The sugar thing I can definitely relate to. While it is not healthy in excess it is no where near as bad as alcohol. Many of us kicked alcohol and then addressed other issues such as caffeine, tobacco and sugar. I think if you broadened your alcohol recovery in some ways and stopped focusing on the people you cannot control, you may be able to gain some control over sugars.

Of course we are here if you need us.

Stevie1

LOL @ Ben and Jerry's rehab...I relate.

Kevin I have less than 90 days, just haven't posted on that thread. You're not alone by a long shot. Congratulations on your two months!

LeadHatter

Thanks everyone-i think i became a little too focused on the 90 days threads etc etc - anyroads i took a lie down - not to sleep just to get collected - i think having sugar helped and also moving on - i sort of paniced i guess when i heard dee was taking time out-hed been so helpful

so i moved on with my posting, accept now ok i MAY get a bit fat via sugar but ok maybe i need it sometimes, i guess if i accept this its something i can deal with.

so sugar+ a lie down sorted me (for today atleast) no need to escape in porn which im pleased about-its not something i consider good for me although my guess is sober porn is probably less danger than drunk porn anyway im not using p presently

thanks for your good responses everyone.

i was feeling concerned for the sick soak nextdoor since i had effectivly cut him off but realising i only did this in response to my father who basically said him or me makes it something i can deal with-the abrupt cutting off basically was my fathers decision so it wasnt my fault.

there are a whole bunch of reasons why i have not been to aa-maybe i should just do it but my fear is it will damage possibly derail my recovery if it goes bad. thats a confidence issue

still i have learned so much from sr carolid and dee and i know know that (and correct me if im wrong here) all addiction has some basis in obsession which can be cured via distraction

thanks for all your response.

1 day at a time - im getting there slowly just been a tug of war on my heart and moral strings walking away [figurativly speaking] from the sick soak next door and im still not out of the woods yet

be well hari krishna

kevin

ChikkaB

LOL yeah getting dry makes you sleepy and a sugar junkie - that's why most AA meetings usually feature coffee and donuts.

Totally normal - your body is detoxing from a substance that, aside from poisoning you, turns into sugar, so yeah, wanting sweets is normal. So is needing to nap or sleep in. Just your body healing up.

Focus on your own sobriety, not your neighbors'. You can't make him sober, only he can do that.

Scared to go to AA because you might fail? LOL the only way to "fail" in sobriety is to not show up for it

You can do this - just keep putting one foot in front of the other.