I am not having a good day.
 

I woke up today and was not centered at all. I had long and joyous days of serenity. I have been sober for 6th grateful months. It has been a long ride going to AA meetings, making new friends, learning how to live again. I have been trying to get sober for a couple years, but now I am all in. I have a plan of attack to try to get through the day, I am taking off work early and talking to my sponser. I am going to reach out online for help and to explain that these are the days that really make or break sobriety. I feel like I can't go on today, but I have been through this before and I know if I just hang tough God will be there. Today I will take action to maintain my sobriety.

I am going to reach out today to other people to see if I can help pour coffee or do something like that at the meeting.

Hey Mcribb, you posted encouraging words for me yesterday when I admitted to having foolishly smoked a j to celebrate 10 days without alcohol.

I'm indebted to you and many others on this site who have been encouraging me in these early days of my sobriety. Hang in there buddy.

Thanks JoeStrummer! I think the whole thing is take action. Posting online, calling, doing something to get out of your head. I feel bad, but atleast I have ways to get through today without picking up, or even destroying my life. That is what I really don't want today. Not only can I make choices today that won't destroy my life. I can HELP people, by pointing out...hey...... these are the days you either you live....or you die...either you get closer to the next drink. or you get further from it.

Hey Mcribb,
Well I don't really feel qualified to help someone who has six months sobriety behind them (this is only my fourth day) but I just want to offer my support.

Dude, 6months! Respect man!
I'm sure your group (and this one) will offer you the strength to make it through this tough time. :)

Forgive me if I'm way off base, Mcribb, but what Step are you on and what action did you take on it yesterday?

That's the action that I needed to recover. Talking to my sponsor was nice and all, but he could not produce a spiritual awakening in me. All he could do was show me the directions and share his experience with those actions. For me to recover, I had to take the precise and specific actions.

9th step Got through my Mom, Dad, Sister. I have a couple more to go. It's more about me just being warn out, but I hear ya. That hammers home I have to get going on the next one. That is a great point. You have to go out and get stuff done!

Mcribb, sorry to hear about your bad day. I know where you're coming from. Being earlier in sobriety than you, I have a lot of "can't go on" days that seem to last a lifetime. It's like I'm finding out just how much misery I was tucking away with the alcohol and now I'm living in it full on. It's sort of... shocking. It could also be a million times worse so I try to count my blessings. I too find that getting out of my head and going to a meeting or getting to my OP recovery group is absolutely necessary if I'm going to continue to succeed. Neither can produce a result but can show me direction and give me support. Hang in there. And congratulations on 6 months. That's very inspirational!

Mcribb-

It's clear you're working the steps as you stated above, so when I feel "uncentered" it's time to start checking a few things and I think you hit "the nail on the head".

You mention making coffee. Perfect! Do something, anything for someone else.

Also, check your praying habits. Are you taking the time each day?

...and finally, man some days I'm just not as good as I am on others. I guess this is what life is, but I'm still working on it just like you.

One thing I know for sure is a grateful recovering alcoholic in AA simply won't drink.

Kjell

I need to Pray every morning just to figure out what the hell I am doing, I prayed to try to get center, but I truely believe God speaks through the others. The guy asking me what step I am working....that is God's work right there.

Mcribb, I hope your feeling better. Just want you to know that I am thinking of you.

God bless you Mcribb! :)

Six months! There's no returning to self-destruction when you've come this far.
Congratulations on your successful journey. If you hadn't made it through day one, you would never have seen six months. Today might be a trying day, but it's not and never will be day one. That's behind you now and forever! Good luck.

Hope your day got better McR :)

D