Hellohaz

I need help!

I'm 18, and my friends are all very into going for nights out/ parties and the like. I do like a drink, but it ALWAYS gets out of hand and I end up utterly annihilated, then I wake up the next day ashamed and depressed about my actions.

I want to be able to go out and enjoy myself without having a drink, but I always give in and buy one, which leads to another and another.


I'm going to Bournemouth (uk) soon for some nights out with my friends and to see some live bands. I REALLY don't want to let myself down and drink.

Any advice?

Thanks in advance!

Anna

Hi and Welcome!

I'm glad that you are seeking support here.

If you are trying to stop drinking and stay sober, the advice I have is to not go. I think it would be really hard to be in such a situation and not drink. And, I do believe you can go out and have fun without drinking, but it would matter who you were with and where you were going.

Stimmed

Hi Hello and Welcome to SR.

I think you may need to learn how to enjoy yourself without alcohol b4 going to see bands with friends that will prob get smashed doing so. Thats going to sound very dull to someone your age, but life can get incredibly duller if one ends up with an alcohol abusive life trust me. You have your whole life in front of you, think hard now and make a decision.
I doubt ALL your friends are going to see these bands, hang with them for a change, who knows the friendship may need it, then its a win win for you.

Best of luck tho :-)

Dee74

Hi hellohaz

Welcome

If you find you can't not given in and buy that drink, you may be like me.
I didn't do anything about it and suffered more and more over twenty years.

You'd be wise to do something about it now - whether it's a recovery group like AA or counselling, or even just talking to your GP.

I believe I can't drink just a little. To stop the madness I have to stay sober.

If you're like me, and you simply just can't say no, I think you're going to have to make some changes in your life....like Anna said maybe Bournemouth is too big an ask right now?

D

silly

I agree with Anna. It's very soon in your sobriety to "test" yourself. Now, if none of your friends will be drinking, things might be easier. But if they're all even just having one or two, my guess is that it will be too much for your will power.

Good luck with what I'm sure is a tough decision

Hellohaz

Thank you for replying! The problem is - I've spent a ton of money organising transport and tickets to these shows.

I am adamant that once these shows are over I am not to go out until I think I am ready. Hopefully I will have the will power to just not drink during these shows.

Stimmed

Sounds like you're not going to miss the shows for anything.

Again best of luck, but the answer you are looking for is in these replies, these are wise people Hello, we have all been where you are right now and talk from exp'.

Hellohaz

Thanks again. I am aware that I must stop going out in order to get better (Unless I can find some non-drinking friends to go with).

I have now rearranged - I am still going to the shows but I am missing the 'nights out'. I've been to many shows without touching a drop, it's the going out that's a big problem for me.

Stimmed

Well you have made some changes at least, thats a start.

Enjoy the shows and take care :-)

artsoul

Welcome! Good for you for making some changes in your plans...... you're just making it easier on yourself to get through the evenings without them turning into another disaster. We just never know when things will go really wrong.....

I found it pretty much impossible to control my drinking too, once I started. Everyone here knows exactly what you're talking about and we're here to help each other stay sober. Keep reading and posting - sobriety is SO much better than having a life run by alcohol.:ghug3

ChikkaB

That's a great decision! Very proud of you.

Rickie

Hey man.

Being realistic you're going to drink. Just before you do remember how you felt when you posted here. Don't let these binges become every weekend + the rest. It's a hard time being 18, in the UK, and it has its benefits and also disadvantages. It's very much a cultural thing to go out and get smashed. A right of passage in a way.

Before you know it you'll have done years of constant bingeing, then it can spiral out of control. It took me a few years to realise!

Anyway have a good one.

Btw I'm 25, and you sound just like I was at 18. It's good you're getting worried now though. Took me a few years.

Best

Danae

Good for you! Congrats on recognizing the problem and facing it now. SR has a lot of good advice and support if you need it in the future.

Dee74

I'm glad you've made some changes, hellohaz

It's not unrealistic at all to believe you can get sober and stay that way at any age - it takes a little work and commitment but it's very achievable

I only wish I was as smart at 18 as I am now (not that it's great now, but it's better lol)
D

battypatty

My experience has taught me it is SOOOOOO much esier to say no to the first drink than the second drink!!!